Putting You Back Together
Author's Note: Hi! I’m sharing a small snippet from a much bigger story that is a passion project for me! The journey of my Warlock, Erebus, and how she became what she is today. She is the embodiment of all my beliefs, of every single thing I love and cherish! There will be three parts to this story, but this small section is from the very last part! I hope you enjoy it!
Summary: Erebus is learning to live in an Exo frame, struggling to find her value again. Thankfully, she has people there for her. Something she didn’t think she’d ever have.
Warnings: Angst, self doubt, not hecking edited because the author is very tired and will do that later XD Nothing else really! But if you spot anything, let me know!
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“But if I didn’t do this mission, you’d find someone who would.”
Aneira’ blinked once. Twice. A third time. Her mind felt as if it was going in slow motion, taking in Erebus’s words and processing them one at a time. A magenta eyebrow raised, a questioning look danced inside of the Hunter’s amber eyes. “Is that bad? If we got someone else to do it instead of you?”
A slow, cautious nod left the Exo’s form. Erebus’s shoulders somehow sank even further towards the icy floor of the Derelict as a clumsy blue metal hand curled around her left wrist, her right fingers tapping upon the cold metal out of discomfort. “I mean, one time? Sure. That’s nothing. But…if there’s a second time? And a third? What good am I if I can’t-”
It was like a warsat hit Aneira in the chest, her breath vanishing as she quickly realized the words about to leave the Exo’s mouth. Soaking up Erebus’s terrified body language, gazing upon the woman who looked like a scared toddler trying to impress a parent, a puppy about to be abandoned, it all became too clear.
Aneira didn’t mean to interrupt. It just slipped out. Taking a firm step forward, Aneira placed a determined hand upon her own hip, those golden eyes hard and strong as she cut the Exo off. “I’m not going to replace you Erebus. Do you understand? That’s not a possibility, there’s not even a single reality in where any of us would do that! Where I would do that..”
“...O-Okay.”
It was soft. Timid. There was fear behind that single word, clearly petrified to let hope in, unable to hear and accept what Aneira was saying.
“I’m serious Erebus. No one can replace you, why would you even-” A loud agitated sigh left Aneira’s quivering lips, her gloved hand running over her face as the Hunter attempted to reset. Yelling wouldn’t help, only actions would, but Erebus wasn’t in a place where she could accept either. “Drifter and I just went through literal hell to get you back. You know I wouldn’t do that for anyone else in this shitty galaxy, why would I toss you away after doing everything I possibly could to get you back to me? Back home?”
Erebus’s flickering blue optics struggled to meet Aneira’s gaze, afraid of what her soul was possibly whispering to the Hunter in front of her. Yet, she couldn’t look away. She couldn’t count the dents she had put on the wall, she couldn’t look down at Harold resting by her struggling feet, no distraction would save her from her partner's reassurance. The Exo knew she was being childish, but the fear in her chest, it was just too strong. Too consuming. “B-Because I’m not…what I used to be.”
“I didn’t care about your strength or what you could provide for me. I didn’t care that you were this scary, capable guard dog for Drifter, this big strange creature the Vanguard couldn’t capture. All that I cared about was that you loved me. That you saw me.” Aneira’s words came out her mouth faster than she could process them, her eyes scrunching closed as her hands clenched and unclenched. The action felt right, repetitive as she simply let go, allowing her emotions to speak for her. A rare occurrence.
“You’re the only person who ever asked me what I wanted. You’re the only person who said “Hey, you’re working hard, do you want a break?” You brought me lunches when the Vanguard stationed me on Nessus for a week, you brought me hair dye when I was undercover at the Dreaming City, for Travelers sake, you painted pink and blue hearts onto the palms of my gloves when I had to leave for the Tower for a debrief I was scared for, so I’d remember you’d be right next to me!” Sucking in a deep breath, Aneira’s eyes slowly opened, burning with unshed tears and shitty lighting of the Derelict.
“...It was never about strength or usefulness Erebus. It was about who you were as a person. Who you still are.”
Exo’s couldn’t cry. A new thing Erebus had just discovered as her arms wrapped around herself, her back curling forwards as her head drooped even closer to the metal floor. “...A-Ane. I’m sorry but…I can’t stand up for much longer.”
A different sigh left the Hunter’s mouth this time. A mix of relief and defeat, knowing that Erebus had heard her words, but simply couldn’t grasp them. Not right now. Not when she was like this. Locking her amber eyes onto the Exo, she could see Erebus’s quivering metal knees, struggling to hold up her body. The Hunter wanted to continue this but she couldn’t.
“Alright.” Carefully, Aneira took a gentle step towards her partner this time. Her gloved hands reached out slowly towards the Exo. “But I’m not letting this go. We’re talking about this later. You’re important Erebus, important to me, to Drifter, to Pierce, to Order. No one’s going to replace you.”
Erebus’s head bobbed weakly to say she was listening. Her strength too far gone as she basically collapsed into the Hunter’s grasp.
That nod wasn’t enough for Aneira. She would make Erebus believe those words. She wouldn’t stop till Erebus felt them in her soul.
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