It had been an eventful day, but Leo could say that about most of the days since Dorothy had come to them. She could go a week without making a sound if she was sucked into a book series, but otherwise she brought life into the bookshop that it had desperately needed. She'd come home in a high fluster today because she and Fiyero had stopped by the garage to see if Will wanted to get ice cream with them and found him talking to a girl. He'd mentioned he was helping someone find a used car today, but apparently not that it was a woman, or that she was pretty. Leo wasn't going to be the one to explain to her that gender didn't actually matter to Will, or that it was highly unlikely that he was being anything but kind. The Will Scarlet who had charmed the pants off someone (or several someones) in every town they were in was at least a decade in the past, and that change had nothing to do with the accident.
It wasn't Dorothy's concern about their friend's love life that stuck with Leo. As someone who'd had to learn to be his own best company when he never left the house, he enjoyed the little madam's dramatics. What hit him was the look she'd leveled at Nick after she said it, stone cold and right in the eyes like he'd better do something about it. For an eighteen-year-old kid, she had a stare that could flay right down to the bone. In Leo's more fanciful moments, he imagined she was secretly some sort of ancient sea creature, who at any moment might choose to unhinge her jaw and drag them all back into the ocean. Affectionately, of course. He was fond of sea monsters. But if Dorothy was picking up on that tension, then it was well past time to say something to one of them. He'd seen her baffled expression through enough movies to know she had absolutely no comprehension of romance.
He'd gotten her and Fiyero settled in with bedtime stories, which Dorothy usually insisted on because Leo always did all the voices. Then he'd tucked himself out of the way at the corner desk in the living room to tinker. He couldn't bear to be outside or even think about it most days, but his mind would eat itself alive if he wasn't building or fixing, and he always had a project. When they were finished, he taped them up in boxes and stacked them neatly in the back of his closet where he wouldn't have to acknowledge them or think about them until he got an idea to improve upon something. The television flickered on low for company, and he murmured most of the words to the movie under his breath while he worked, like he was humming a favorite song. He tried not to do it when other people were around, unless he was trying to make Dorothy and Fiyero laugh with his impressions.
The last few days had been a rollercoaster and he didn't know where exactly he stood. There was one place he always knew he could go and just be exactly as he was. Leo knew exactly how Nick came and had never judged him for it. He helped keep him functional, as human-presenting as possible for a creature who was only partially human anymore.
Seeing the lion in the sunspot, he sighed softly to himself, what was left of the pieces of his heart aching for the being who had continued to stand with him. Quietly, he stepped into the space and kicked off his shoes, going to lay against soft fur and warm muscle. "Hey, Leo," he greeted softly, turning his face into his mane.
--
Coming to as a human in a busy city when he’d spent... he didn’t even know how long it was as a lion had been a near-constant anxiety attack. Finding the bookstore had been a source of refuge, and finding Nick shortly after that equally so. Being able to help him and keep his friend in working order was the main reason Leo didn't just give up and go find a zoo to live in.
Though he never set foot outside the shop anymore, some days it was still too much for him. Those were the days Nick walked into the apartment above the shop to find a lion napping in a puddle of sunshine. While still there, his emotions were less complicated as a lion. It understood fear, but not the nameless anxiety that was almost always at a low hum in his brain. Fear meant run from it or eat it. If it couldn't do either of those things, then there was nothing there to fear.
It understood sadness though, and Leo was particularly attuned to it in either form, having lived with it for so long. Nick wasn't often sad. He huffed softly, part greeting and part question that he was free to ignore until he had his voice back, and probably then too. Leo talked a lot--never going outside meant he'd had to become his own best company--but he never forced other people to talk back. He shifted minutely, that warm, furry side pressing against him. Lion snuggles were the best snuggles; he knew from experience.
--
He never minded coming in to the lion in the loft. It was a surprise he ever turned human, really, but he was always grateful when he did. Nick understood what it was to just want to disconnect and not live in the world of humanity and emotions. It was easier to sink into that disconnect, ignore what was left of the humanity in him, than it was to keep on trying with people who didn't or couldn't understand.
Sadness wasn't what he would have called whatever had sunk over him, even that was exactly what it was. That quiet huff made the corner of his lips tug slightly as fingers sank into his fur gently. The only times (outside of one recent) that he could recall feeling warm, were when he was curled up against Leo this way. He didn't mind the way Leo talked and talked, it helped fill the space where he just couldn't, but it was always comfortable. Leo never expected him to talk at all if he didn't want to or couldn't find the words.
Nick kicked off his boots to the corner of the room before he curled completely into the space Leo gave him. His fingers slid idly through his mane, soft and gentle, scratching lightly behind his ear. "I made a mistake, Leo," he murmured quietly. "I thought that I could just have fun with someone for a night."
--
He gave a soft, rumbling purr at the scritches, tufted tail flicking back and forth. He wasn’t one to turn down snuggles or petting, and it was oddly easier for both of them when he was an animal. Nick was all about distance and control, both things he respected at all times, but this shape helped him let down some of those physical barriers. Leo was always honored to be let in at all.
He made a soft whine that was equal parts disagreement and dismay. He hadn’t yet determined if this was a conversation that required a human voice. Sometimes talking was easier when no one was answering back, but he sensed this might be something that needed actual advice and encouragement instead of just listening. Nick was ticking wrong somewhere too, and that was going to require human hands before he left.
--
He had never figured out how to easily or readily talk to a person when he was in turmoil. Leo always made it easy for him, giving him this option. It was easier for the words to come out when he wasn't expected to have an immediate response to something someone else had to say, or had to process someone else's opinion on something. He gave a firm stroke to the softness of his ear before scratching again gently as he continued to gather his thoughts.
He heard the disagreement there and sighed softly, pressing his face firmly against his side for a moment. "I met this man, and damnit, Leo, he makes my palms itch," the words were quiet, ruffling the fur of his mane. "But..." He shifted, resting his back along Leo's side and dropping his head back to rest against his warmth. He rubbed at his leg, an ache there to match the wrong tick that his friend heard. "We are definitely not a good thing. Fucking disaster waiting to happen."
--
He settled when he realized this was a conversation that needed listening rather than advice, at least for now. He knew Nick struggled with emotions in particular, feeling them and talking about them. It was better just to let him get it out. He was the best person to say whether or not his friend was heartless though, and the answer was emphatically not. Their friendship was proof enough of that. Leo didn’t see anyone else lining up to deal with his many idiosyncrasies.
He rested his head between his paws, eyes closing in bliss at the ear scritches. They quirked with interest when he said he met someone because that was definitely noteworthy. He wasn’t sure Nick even noticed that most people were living, breathing humans, let alone attractive ones. Then again, attraction had fallen way down the list of priorities for either of them. He flicked him with his tail, both teasing and an invitation to continue. It was a countdown now to how long he could stand the click of wrong machinery before he felt compelled to fix it.
--
There was no part of Nick that believed he was capable of anything entirely human. He didn't believe in his heart, what there might be left of it. He knew that Leo didn't share that opinion, but his friend was biased. There was no one else who had chosen to stand by his side and keep him running. If it had been up to Nick, he'd have made them let him stay in a field and rust.
He felt the ear quirk and sighed softly to himself, knowing he had buried the lead on that particular bit. He had never let himself properly see or want anything or anyone. There had been no reason to, not really, and Will was the highest possible abnormality possible for him. The teasing flick of his tail had him catching it and wrapping it around his hand and wrist gently, playing lightly with the fur on the end. "He's a thief and an asshole. I'm a cop and a bigger asshole."
--
Leo could calmly contemplate his own death or the possibility of staying a lion for the rest of his life, gradually losing the ability to talk and reason and tinker, which he'd once considered an essential part of himself and still did in its way. But he wasn’t capable of being reasonable when it came to leaving his few remaining friends behind. He’d failed to save almost everyone who'd ever mattered to him. He wouldn't lose anyone else.
He made a chuffing sound that passed as laughter in this form. Leave it to Nick to never do relationships and then pick the most star-crossed one he could possibly find. It had a poetic beauty to it, like a story out of a book. He supported anything that made his friend happy, including this, if it did. He curled around him, bumping his head under his hand for more pets. He was there if he needed to talk more or if he just needed quiet.
--
Nick knew that it wasn't easy for Leo, living after all of his people were gone. Every time he heard him speak, saw him tinker, he breathed a little easier. He couldn't admit to it, couldn't put it to words. He tried to show it, instead, in any little way he could bring himself to. He wouldn't add himself to the list of people that Leo had lost.
That soft chuff had him tugging gently at his mane in retaliation. He wasn't sure that Will or anything involving him could make him happy in the long run. None of it was anything he was used to or had ever thought to want. The bump had his hand shifting to continue petting him gently, his nails sliding through fur. "I thought maybe we could at least be... friends," the word sounded choked, unfamiliar on his tongue. "I don't think we can."
--
Nick knew that it wasn't easy for Leo, living after all of his people were gone. Every time he heard him speak, saw him tinker, he breathed a little easier. He couldn't admit to it, couldn't put it to words. He tried to show it, instead, in any little way he could bring himself to. He wouldn't add himself to the list of people that Leo had lost.
That soft chuff had him tugging gently at his mane in retaliation. He wasn't sure that Will or anything involving him could make him happy in the long run. None of it was anything he was used to or had ever thought to want. The bump had his hand shifting to continue petting him gently, his nails sliding through fur. "I thought maybe we could at least be... friends," the word sounded choked, unfamiliar on his tongue. "I don't think we can."
--
He was never bothered by what Nick could or couldn't put into words. His actions spoke clearly for him, and Leo didn't have to doubt that loyalty and care. He told him every day by showing up and sticking around, in all the small and large ways they looked after each other. It wasn't just an unspoken assurance that they'd die for each other, if it ever came to that. It was a daily commitment to staying alive for each other, and that was a lot harder.
He tilted his head, a silent question as to why. Friendship wasn't something Nick often sought out. Theirs had just sort of happened upon them due to circumstance. He didn't imagine it was something he'd easily walk away from either if he'd decided he wanted it, so it had to be a problem on the other side. Nick's brand of stoicism could be acquired taste, but Leo could attest that he was an excellent friend once he'd decided to keep someone.
--
His connection with Leo was far easier than he had ever expected to have with anyone. There was no expectation there, no necessity for him to speak more than he felt was really necessary. He wouldn't choose to leave him, not after he had lost everyone in his world already once. Every day, he woke up and kept going, doing what he needed to make sure that Leo did too.
He swallowed lightly at the silent question, his chest tightening lightly. "It wasn't my first intention," he admitted, knowing that he certainly hadn't looked at Will and thought of being his friend first. "We had a very disastrous first extended encounter, and tried to salvage it with a second." None of it made any sense to him.
--
Nick was probably the only person who understood how valuable that kind of friendship was. The easy acceptance, the zero expectation. Leo was a shadow of the person he used to be. There wasn’t enough left to be much of anything for anyone, and some days he had nothing at all to give. Nick didn't judge him or expect better from him. He just let him be.
It sounded to him like it couldn't be that disastrous if they were both still trying, but that was a very human thing to try to express as a lion. He settled for a soft, rumbling purr of reassurance instead. Even if it wasn’t the kind of thing that would be okay, he was here for him. Leo considered it progress that he’d even tried to make a connection with someone.
--
Nick understood entirely what it was to barely have anything left of himself. It was one of the reasons he couldn't bring himself to leave Leo's side. There wasn't another creature alive he felt could truly understand that part of him, and he wasn't inclined to letting go. They could simply be, exactly as they were, with no expectations otherwise.
That soft, rumbling purr brought him some comfort, encouraged him to sink just a little bit closer to his friend. He had never intended to connect with anyone, had been content with living his life without any genuine connection to anyone else. There had never been a need, or even a desire, for anyone else in his life, after all. He scratched gently behind his ear again and let himself just relax against him.
--
Leo was content to let the comfortable silence stand for a while. He found it comforting to coexist like this, lion and man both relaxing and enjoying the quiet company without any pressure. Eventually, when the pool of sunlight had gradually grown smaller, he couldn’t stand the off-cadence ticking any longer. He could never stand to leave something broken, least of all something that had to be causing Nick some discomfort.
He stood and stretched, giving a mighty yawn, and head-butted him gently him toward the door. It was prompting to get out unless he wanted to see a very naked human Leo in a minute. He didn’t have any problem with it either way. Most shapeshifters he knew had known were casual about nudity. It came with the territory, but a warning was polite either way.
--
Nick was never one to push for conversation or sound at all. It was a comfort to know that he could lay in silence with another being and it wasn't considered rude, or harsh. Laying curled into Leo's side, he gave absent rubs to his thigh, trying to ignore the ache of it. Oftentimes, it was easy to ignore his own discomfort.
When he stood, Nick stood up and stretched, the soft head-butt making him huff lightly. "Alright, alright. I'll see you in a few minutes," he murmured as he walked out of the room. A naked Leo wasn't something he was in the mood to see. It wasn't that he hadn't, he couldn't spend so much time with the shapeshifter and not have.
--
Despite having been one all his life, Leo was the last person to explain the mechanics of shapeshifting, like where all that fur and extra mass went when he changed back. It was an impossibility according to the physics of this world, but here he was. Spending the day as a cat posed no risk to him. It was only if he stayed that way for months or years that he'd start to lose speech and his other human qualities. Too long, and he might not be able to come back under his own power. It didn't always seem like the worst fate, but he wouldn't do that to Nick.
He tugged his clothes back on and wandered back out to meet him, tipping his head toward the workshop. "Let's get you fixed up." Even if he never did anything with his inventions, he couldn't help making them. His mind would eat itself alive without something to tinker over. The room was cluttered with work tables and tools and bits of things, all the finished ones taped neatly in labeled boxes on shelves along one wall.
--
He didn't give much thought to the mechanics of shapeshifting. It simply was the way it was and a part of who his friend was. This world was nothing like what they came from, and he couldn't expect this world to understand anything from theirs. He would be sad if his friend chose to sank into his feline side, but he would understand it. They both had known too much loss to be expected to stay human, or easily so.
When he walked back out, he knew better than to protest Leo's need to fix the wrong tick. He was used to them, ignored them for as long as he could feasibly manage, which wasn't healthy. Following him to the workshop, he sighed softly and went to settle in the chair that made it easy, rolling up the leg on his shorts to give him access to the panel he needed.
--
Leo knew that Nick knew that he shouldn't ignore those things, and he really wasn't the lecturing type. Who was he to tell someone to take better care of themselves? He had an anxiety attack if he got too close to the door. It made him sad, though, that Nick discounted his own pain. It was almost like he thought he deserved to suffer.
"You don't have to hurt, you know," he said gently. There was no synthetic skin covering the leg panel, which never failed to set Leo's temper simmering. They hadn’t bothered to cover anything that could be hidden by clothing, like Nick wasn't even a person who might care about such things.
It was quick work to adjust the gears and get the metal clockwork turning smoothly again. It wasn’t the most efficient machinery, by far, and Leo was constantly working on upgrades. "How does that feel?" He pulled his hands out but didn't move to replace the plate just yet, giving him a chance to shift and test it first.
--
Leo had no way of knowing just how close his thoughts were to the truth of it. It wasn't often (or at all) that Nick chose to discuss any of his replaced parts. They only usually served to remind him how far from human he had gotten in so many ways. The soft words made him sigh, and he didn't know if Leo could understand. He'd never know if he didn't try to explain.
His eyes lingered on the leg panel, metal surrounded by skin, rivets and plates instead of muscle and skin. "If it hurts... I can remember there's still parts of me that are human." The words were quiet, barely loud enough for even Leo to hear. They were a dark truth for him. There were whole parts of him that weren't human anymore, however cleverly hidden by synthetic skin some of them might be.
He watched him working, unable to look away from the mess of the clockwork, a far cry from the technology they were surrounded with here. Once Leo's hands were out, he shifted his leg, curling and stretching it, standing for a moment. "Better," he admitted before sitting back down, "Thank you."
--
"You're all human, Nick," he assured him gently. "What are bodies if not a collection of moving parts and obscure processes? Maybe a little more finessed than these, but that's just shoddy workmanship for you." It irritated him to no end that, for as remarkable as Nick's inner workings were, they could have been better with just a little more care and attention.
He was rapidly becoming an expert on this world's technology, so much more streamlined and efficient than what was here. He’d love to be able to give him a better overhaul someday, but for as outdated as the clockwork seemed by comparison, it worked in ways that wires and circuits didn't quite manage.
He nodded, fixing the plate back into place and laying down his tools. "That does answer some questions about what I've been working on though." He smiled, tipping his head toward one of the back tables for him to join him as he unwrapped one of his projects. It was a kind of synthetic skin, much like what Nick had already, only he'd tried to make it softer, more like the real thing, but still durable. "If you like it, we can cover some of the exposed machinery. If not, it'll have other applications." If it didn't bother him, it didn’t bother Leo. He just wanted him to have options.
--
It wasn't an easy way for him to think of himself. He couldn't completely remember the time before he had started losing pieces of himself to a cruel world that demanded control. Even what Leo called shoddy workmanship was beyond anything Nick could understand, let alone fix. He didn't want to think what would have become of him without his help, really.
"They were punishments as much as they were 'upgrades', Leo," he said softly. They were never meant to be beautiful, not on the ones like him. They allowed a higher level of control, and he had never liked having his control taken away, which hilariously had only led to him losing more and more. Worst sort of catch 22, that.
Sitting still while his plate was replaced, he couldn't help but give him a slightly curious look. Following him back to the table, his eyes drifted over the covered pieces. The sight of the synthetic skin made him blink slightly and instinctively look down at the uncovered plate. Reaching over, he brushed a careful finger over it before yanking his hand back and looking at him in surprise. "It's soft," the words were filled with quiet wonder. "We could cover them?"
--
"I know. You didn't deserve that." His expression softened, a mixture of empathy and sadness. Nick didn't deserve what had been done to him. Nobody deserved to watch pieces of themselves be cut away and replaced, all for the sake of creating better soldiers. This world was alarming and busy and loud, and it had fresh horrors every day on the news (which he never watched anymore for his own sanity). But it lacked some of the very specific cruelties of their world, and that was a point in its favor. There was far more freedom here for both of them.
"It matches temperature pretty well too." He nodded. It couldn't be too insular or he'd overheat, but if it didn't trap enough, it would feel less like real skin. People weren't naturally cool to the touch. "If you want to. There will be seams, since we have to be able to get in to the machinery, but it's a start." He had to know more about how it reacted to Nick's real skin before he could work on something to make the seams less obvious, but it was on his list of things to work out and improve.
--
There were times that he wasn't so sure he didn't deserve every bit of it and more. Maybe not in the instances that each and every piece was carved out, but the end result of it all. All too clearly, he remembered the first surgery, even if nothing before it was clear anymore. The terror of it had never really gone away, and he remembered how long it had taken him to allow Leo to help him. Somehow, it was easier here, letting him do it all. There was a comfort in knowing he wouldn't have more pieces taken away from him against his will, and Leo was far more gentle than anyone else had ever been.
His throat tightened lightly at the care and consideration and he had to choke down the protest that he wasn't worth the effort. He knew that wasn't anything Leo would stand to listen to. "That's alright. Most people won't be close enough to notice," he pointed out with a quiet sigh. He knew how much work had already gone into it for Leo to be showing it to him at all.
--
Leo would never purposely hurt him. He couldn’t even bring himself to destroy his creations when he planned to do nothing with them, hence the rows of boxes. He could certainly never do to a living thing what the people of Oz had done to Nick. He valued that trust in him and tried always to be worthy of it, always with the full realization that those gears and cogs were connected to flesh and bone.
"Not even your new friend?" He raised an eyebrow, the shadow of a smile on his lips. He wouldn’t be Leo if he didn’t tease at least a little, but he usually knew where the lines were and kept well to one side of them. "This one is sized for your leg panel, if you want to give it a try. See how it feels, and then if you like it, I can have some more ready in a week or so. If not, I'll keep working on it." He'd do that anyway because he already knew it could be improved, but it only really mattered how it worked in practice, and that was something only Nick could tell him.
--
The knowledge that Leo didn't have a single part of him that would allow him to do what had been done to Nick had been why he'd let him help to begin with. There were some people that were just so purely good that it was impossible to think of them otherwise. Leo was one of those in Nick's world. He did as much to keep the cogs and gears from defining him as he did to keep them running sometimes.
The teasing comment made the corner of his lips twitch and he shrugged his shoulder. "I would let him be," he admitted, because that much was true. However, it also wasn't something he anticipated happening, and especially not without him knowing that he literally wasn't completely human anymore. He took a moment to give it serious consideration before nodding carefully once. "Alright, let's try it."
--
Leo would have argued the definition. He wasn’t a good person. He’d failed everyone who ever counted on him, and he'd probably fail Nick someday too. They were both broken bits of people held together with tape and stubbornness by the time Oz got through with them. He didn’t know if there was value in hanging on long after it would have made more sense to just give up, but here they were. He might fail him eventually, but it wasn’t going to be today.
His smile widened slightly, less teasing and more happy for him. That was progress for Nick, even if it never went past this, and he was proud of him for trying. "Gonna see him again?" The question was casual, no expectation hinged on it, and Leo wouldn't have argued with either answer. He wasn’t in the business of pushing people into things, even if he’d thought Nick would stand to be pushed.
He nodded, giving his shoulder a soft squeeze of encouragement. He babbled an explanation that probably only made about 20% sense to Nick as he worked. It was partly pure enthusiasm over the project, but it was partly a need to always let him know exactly what he was doing with his body. It wasn’t a small thing, to trust another person with that. Knowing what was happening and how it worked was a kind of agency.
--
He knew that Leo wouldn't agree with him, that he couldn't see himself the way that Nick did. They were both barely held together, and there were days he wondered why they bothered to keep going. He was sure that one day, he'd fail him, far more than he already had.
Shaking his head slowly, he hated to see him look anything like happy for him in this. He didn't think it was anything for anyone to hope for, him having something like that. "I don't know," he admitted quietly. It didn't matter that he wanted to. It wasn't a smart idea for him to, he didn't think, for various reasons. The top of the list was that he didn't think it was what Will actually wanted.
His usual stoic silence reigned while Leo babbled as he worked. He appreciated the effort at making sure that he knew exactly what was going on, it didn't work half so well if he didn't, honestly. Even though he couldn't follow all of the science, he nodded along and committed it all to memory. He spent quite a lot of time teaching himself, going to basics to understand the things Leo said.
--
He just nodded, deciding not to pry. The one-sided conversation earlier had been telling enough. Nick was confused, and there was nothing Leo could ask or say that would lessen that confusion. Some things just had to be worked out on their own. He was the last person to give advice on relationships, especially when he didn't even know the other person. But he was there if he needed to talk, and he knew Nick understood that.
He did his best to explain things in normal human words first. The rest was pure pleasure in the subject matter. The science here was so different from what they had at home. There was always so much to learn, and blending some of their world with some of this one to create something new sparked that intellectual curiosity better than anything. "Let me know what you don't like about it," he said when he finished, straightening. "I can always keep working on it."
It was nothing short of certifiable that he was doing this again. Last night had been a disaster, and he’d never expected to hear from Nick again after he walked out of the restaurant, much less for him to lead with an apology. Still, he should have ignored the message, blocked the number, never given the man another thought. It would be safer for both of them that way. But they were both established idiots and assholes, and he was starting to think they deserved each other.
Having a drink felt safer than dinner. It was a normal way to meet people, and he’d done it plenty of times. Last night, for example, because drinking and going home with a stranger felt better than sitting alone with his thoughts. They’d also agreed to try to be friends, which was also safer, if more unusual. Will regretted it a little because goddamn look at him, but he wasn’t so self-destructive as to want a repeat of last night. He could do friends. Probably. He paused in the doorway to let his eyes adjust to the dimmer lighting and look for Nick.
--
This was far from a smart thing for him to be doing, but then he hadn't been doing the smart thing with Will at all. He wouldn't have blamed him for ignoring the text message he sent, apology or not. Last night had been, by far, his worst attempt at anything like that. But now he had made it clear that he wasn't exactly good and most definitely fell into an asshole category of his own.
A drink felt distant enough for comfort, safe. He'd gotten to the bar first, settled in with a drink of his own with his eyes on the entrance. He couldn't help but watch the door carefully and the sight of him had his eyes drifting slowly over him. The man still made his palms itch with the want to get his hands on him and he had to tamp down hard on that desire. He lifted his hand just enough to catch his attention.
--
It was stupid that knowing Nick wasn't exactly good only made him more attractive. It was a fucking problem, is what it was, one that would probably take years of therapy to unravel. Will wouldn't have put his hands on anything that was too good. As unwelcome as that kiss had been at the time, his mind couldn't help replaying it, the hint of darkness in him almost too much to resist. That... wasn't a helpful train of thought.
The corner of his mouth pulled up in a smile when he saw him, and he made his way over with a soft greeting as he sat down. He ordered a drink, unable to help looking him over. Unfair how he got better every time he saw him. He smiled slightly as his gaze lifted back to his eyes. "How's your day been?" He was determined not to fuck this up again, and that meant acting as normal as possible.
--
He quashed the spread of warmth at the smile he shot him by covering it with the burn of alcohol, draining his drink and gesturing for another. He gave him a soft greeting of his own as he settled next to him. He couldn't help but look him over again as he settled, unable to help it. The man was too damn beautiful for Nick's good and it didn't help the self-control.
A small smile lifted the corner of his lips as their eyes met. "Really damn dull," he admitted with a chuckle, thinking of the piles of paperwork he'd been saddled with as a result of his last write-up. He didn't think he'd ever get off of desk duty some days, or away from parking. "What about you?"
--
It was stupid how much he liked Nick's eyes on him, worse that he wanted him to use more than his eyes. This friendship thing was probably as doomed to failure as their last attempt, but he had a feeling he'd enjoy going down in flames with him. He took a sip when his drink arrived, welcoming the familiar burn, although he doubted it would clear his head.
"You in trouble?" He quirked an eyebrow, a smirk pulling at the corner of his mouth. He’d said he was lucky to have a job at all, so it seemed like a reasonable assumption. "Not bad. Real pretty bike in the shop today. She'll be fast when she runs." In the disaster that was last night, he didn’t think he’d mentioned his day job. Stealing probably would pay the bills, except that wasn’t why he did it. He never kept anything he took. He didn’t have to anymore.
--
He didn't harbor any delusions that they would manage to be successful at this. No attachments. Two assholes and a barrel of issues between them. Nothing about any part of the equation showed that it could do anything except burst into flames. Just one look at Will made him all too willing to burn, though, and that was a problem.
"To say the very least," he chuckled, shaking his head before taking a drink from his new glass. "My last write-up was, a uh.. what's the word they use here... a doozy?" Spinning his glass on the bar top, he watched Will with a slow smile of his. "A mechanic, huh? What does the bike need to be running?" He had found that he had a fondness for cars and motorcycles here.
--
"What did you do?" He chuckled softly, slowly spinning the glass between his hands. He was determined to act like this was normal and they were friends until it was true, ignoring all the awkwardness and bad feelings of the previous night. It was easier if he pretended they already knew each other and this was just catching up, and that meant asking after his job like he hadn’t a major trauma response when he first heard what he did for a living.
He stopped spinning the glass when he realized Nick was doing the same and took another slow sip. "Like you said. Most of my skills didn't exactly translate here. Had to learn new ones. We didn't even have cars where I'm from." He'd been fascinated the first time he saw one, fingers itching to get behind the wheel and under the hood. He made a face, obvious distaste in it. "A lot of things. Owner isn't caring for it properly."
--
The question tugged his lips into another slow, partial smile. "Ah, well... I might have told my supervisor that he was as thick as the stick shoved up his ass that impeded any real thought," he shrugged slowly and took a long drink from his glass. He didn't handle being told to do someone's dirty work very well. And if the story helped them both ignore the trouble of the night before, he was fine with that. He just hoped he wouldn't get another shut down, or even worse.
He nodded in understanding as he listened to Will talk and huffed out a quiet laugh. "Yeah, same here. So much about this place is entirely different. Cars, the technology, all of it." He wasn't driven to do much that involved the actual world he was in. Protecting people was all he was after, here. The look on his face made him smile and shake his head. "That's a damn shame."
--
His laugh was soft and warm as he shook his head. "You weren't kidding when you said you were lucky to have a job." If Will was lowkey pretending to himself that Nick had literally any other job that they might be talking about, that was his business. He knew it wasn't a long-term solution if they were going to be friends, but he hoped it would work for him at least until there was a measure of understanding, if not trust, there.
His next question pressed right at the edge of that delusion, threatening to pop it like a soap bubble. "Why do you do it then?" It wasn’t judgemental, or at least he hoped it didn't sound that way. He was curious, and he wanted to understand him. Theoretically, Will knew all cops weren't terrible people. In practice, he'd only met the terrible ones. He wanted to understand how someone who didn't seem terrible to him could fit in that line of work.
--
The sound of that laugh sent warmth blooming through him and he knew that he was in deep shit. "I told you," he chuckled darkly, shaking his head slowly. The job hadn't been his first thought, but it had been the one that panned out. But then, they hadn't had enough conversation for Will to know jack or shit about him, and vice versa.
The question made him sigh softly. "Because someone has to be willing to stop people in power who don't actually know what's wrong or right," he answered before draining his glass again. He was under no delusion that it would change the way Will had looked at him the night before.
--
In one question, he managed to ruin the easy conversation they'd established, so different from last night. Will would kick himself for not being able to leave things alone, except he had the feeling this was important. He wasn’t great at meeting emotional problems head on. It was easier just to walk when things got difficult. But he didn't seem capable of completely staying away from Nick, even if he should.
It was a good answer, if it was true. He didn’t know what reason Nick would have to lie about it, but people didn’t generally need good reasons to be dishonest. He didn’t think he was, but he wouldn’t rule it out. "I'm sorry, for the way I reacted last night. It wasn’t fair to judge you without knowing you," he said softly. He didn’t know if his apology was worth anything, especially when he still wasn't entirely comfortable with what he did for a living, but he was trying to do better.
--
There was a part of him that hated how honest his answer was, wishing he could have just continued to live in the easy rapport. If he were anyone else, he might have been able to come up with some easy, breezy reason of ease for why that was the job he did here. Why he did anything he'd chosen to do, why he had fought when he'd fought.
The soft words made him sigh heavily and shake his head as he gestured for another drink, knowing he would want one far sooner than later. "It is what it is," he said bluntly. "My entire life has been lived under the thumb of people who only cared about their prosperity. Even when I was a soldier for someone who had 'saved' me," his words were cold and he could feel the wrong clicking that came with an elevation in his blood pressure he couldn't afford. Taking a deep breath, he forced himself to calm down. "You're the one who said no attachments, Will. Why should I expect you to get to know any part of me that you don't want to?"
--
"Sounds familiar. Makes sense people can't be trusted with power anywhere," he said softly. He drained the glass and nodded for another as their bartender reappeared. That was the Sheriff of Nottingham in a nutshell, caring more about his own wealth than what it did to the people around him. Will saw it here too, everywhere he looked, and it made him sick. He couldn't do anything more about it here than he could there, but he couldn't stop fighting it in small ways either.
He got the feeling he *did* want that though, that there was something being asked of him here that he couldn't give. Will had never in his life been enough for someone. He didn't expect that to change now. He sighed softly, running a hand through his hair. "I'm trying, Nick." It wasn't defensive, just quiet and honest. It was why he was here right now, trying to fix what he'd fucked up last night. Except things couldn't always be fixed. Nick wasn't going to forget the way he'd looked at him. He wouldn't expect him to.
--
"They're not all terrible, just," he paused for a moment, "what's that saying about power and corruption?" There was signs of that same corruption here, and he was sure it was inescapable no matter where he was. One person had never been able to do much to fight against it. Even with people standing alongside him, the fight hadn't been in their favor.
He didn't know what he wanted here, why he had asked for this. "I know," he said quietly, gentle. It was a far cry from the stern coldness his voice had taken on the night before. "I'm not saying you're not. My job's the very least of what I am, Will. I have no reason to hold anything against you, especially not last night."
--
He nodded in silent agreement. Will had never been interested in power. Unfortunately, that seemed like exactly the sort of people who should have it. If he could get over his personal bias, he could grudgingly admit that Robin might be worth following. He'd actually given up some of his power to help people, and that was something he'd seen happen exactly once. He had no idea what his brother was up to here, just that he was here.
"Alright. Where do we go from here with this friends thing?" He shot him a small smile. It seemed like they'd cleared the air at least a little, and while Will could definitely hold a grudge, he wasn't harboring one for anything that had happened last night. They'd both apologized. That was good enough for him. That didn't mean he knew what to do next though, or how to move into something that was more comfortable for both of them.
--
There wasn't anyone that he felt was worth following at home. Even here, he hadn't read a single thing to give him hope in any of the leaders in this place. Maybe, on the smaller scale, sure there were some that weren't terrible he supposed. He had a feeling about the man in charge of his station, but he couldn't make any guarantees.
"We drink, and we get to know each other," he shrugged with a slow smile. He held his glass up for him to tap lightly. "Let's just have a good night, Will." The invitation was clear, the hope right alongside it.
--
"Okay." He smiled, raising his glass briefly in return. Shelving the angst and just having a good time didn’t seem like a particular skill for either of them, but there were a lot of things Will was trying tonight that he wasn’t good at. As Nick had said, they wouldn't get better if they didn't try.
Getting to know each other better seemed... doable. "Play a game? 20 Questions. If you don't want to answer, you can drink and we'll move on, no comment." It seemed like a way to keep them out of dangerous territory. Not that Will had a lot of secrets left after last night's.
--
Tapping his glass lightly to his, he nodded his head once before taking a sip. What he had requested wasn't anything he was familiar with doing, but he was willing to try. It was a whole new world. Literally. If they couldn't be something more than what they had been now, he wasn't sure that they could at all.
Nick set his glass down, his eyes drifting over Will's face before he nodded in acceptance. "Alright. That sounds fair," he agreed. "You get to start, then. What's your question?"
--
Will had drinks with people, and he got to know people, but the two activities weren't usually combined. They served very different functions in his life. It wasn’t that surprising that Nick was turning out to be singular in every way. He supposed if they wanted something different, they were going to have to do things a little differently.
"No repeats," he added with a slightly wicked grin. He didn’t want his questions turned back on him. Too boring. He took a drink while he considered what he wanted to know and decided to start with something easy. They were trying to keep it light, after all. "What’s your favorite thing about being here? In this world, or time, or whatever it is."
--
Nick didn't do either, grabbing drinks with someone or getting to know them. He lived a life of solitude outside of very few, close connections, and those were nothing like this. Will was, all around, something unique in his world. He didn't make connection easy at all, let alone anything like this.
"No repeats," he agreed with a soft chuckle. It was a little too easy that way, anyway. The question made him hum slightly, his glass spinning between his fingers along the bar top. "Honestly? I'm not sure. I don't spend a lot of time living." It was a painfully honest truth, "But, I like this. Just being able to be a... a person." He cleared his throat, "Alright. Forests or water?"
--
"Forests. But as someone who lived in one for a while, you're not going to last long without a water source nearby." He grinned. Aesthetically, he'd always take trees though. More habitable, more places to hide, and more like home than most places he'd lived. He wasn't going to let himself dwell on why that was the case though. He told himself they were Robin's friends more than his anyway.
"So you like being able to be a person, but you don't do a lot of living. Why's that?" It may have been too serious a question for the game they were playing, but Nick had an easy out if he didn't want to answer it. Maybe Will just wasn't very good at casually getting to know someone, but he was more interested in what Nick was like than what his favorite color was.
--
He chuckled quietly in understanding, nodding as he sipped on his drink. He knew that much, and it made him miss the days of training where it was easier to just focus on work instead of everything else. Somehow, it didn't surprise him to learn that Will had lived in a forest.
"Because person is a relative descriptor for what I am these days," he admitted with a slow shrug. "Living isn't something I'm really familiar with anymore and I'm still trying to figure out how much I'm capable of doing it." He wanted to get to know Will and was willing to try and let him do the same with him. "Why no attachments?"
--
He supposed that was fair, asking a difficult question and getting one in return. He took a few moments to consider it, deliberately not taking a drink as he did. He was going to answer it. He just had to figure out exactly how honest he was going to be with it. It would have been true no matter what, but truth came in degrees. "Because I don't trust anyone to stay, and they sure as hell shouldn't trust me. As you saw last night, I tend to hurt people just by being myself. Safer on both sides to keep it simple."
He took a slow drink, the honesty burning his throat almost as much as the liquor. That was more weakness than he was willing to admit to most people, but if they were really going to do this, then Nick deserved to know exactly what he was getting into. "Why'd you kiss me?" He didn't know that was the question that was going to come out when he opened his mouth, but apparently his thoughts were still tied up in the previous night.
--
He had halfway expected him to drink and pass on the question, taking last night into consideration. It was easy for him to be silent and patient, since it was a default for him as a whole. He huffed out a quiet noise at his answer, taking another slow drink. He knew defensive measures when he saw them, and having them confirmed for him only made him relax further.
Staring down at his glass on the bartop, he considered taking a drink but that felt like a coward's way out. "To get you to decide if you were leaving or staying, knowing I'd accept either one," he sighed quietly. People didn't stay in his world, either, until incredibly recently in the grand scheme of things. "Why did you answer my text today?"
--
His chuckle was short and harsh. "That's a shit reason. Next time kiss me because you want to." He drained the glass, barely tasting it and aware that it gave him no out for the next question if he needed it. He'd answered every question so far, and he was still going to be hungover as hell tomorrow if the game kept on like this. He couldn't help feeling Nick had been trying to make him leave, and Will couldn't exactly blame him for that. He did the same thing to people all the time.
He looked him over briefly, like he wasn't quite sure of the answer himself, a small smile coming to his lips. "I like you. For some reason." That probably said something deeply psychological about him, but he wasn't diving into that one if he could help it. He drew a slow breath, not expecting the game to take such a serious turn, but as long as they were in it. "What do you want that you shouldn't?"
--
He rolled his shoulder slowly, "Believe me, I know." The worst part was how much wanting to kiss him had actually factored into it: which was to say far more than was reasonable. Lifting his glass, he emptied it before Will answered, glad he didn't have to work the next day or he'd definitely end up on permanent desk duty with the hangover he knew was impending.
Setting his glass at the edge of the bar and gesturing for another round for them, he took the question seriously. It didn't matter that he couldn't tap out. He wouldn't have, even if it had been an option. "To kiss you again," he answered, turning lightly in his chair, "the way I did on the sidewalk, and more." He knew it was reckless and downright stupid to still want the man sitting next to him. It didn't stop the wanting.
--
Will wanted to kiss him too, badly and every single way he could think of, but not to prove a point. It was the biggest flaw in their friendship plan. He wasn’t known for having the best impulse control anyway. He wrapped his hand around the fresh glass, grateful to have it even if it was seeming less likely that he’d use it for their game. He was the sort of person who appreciated knowing where all the exits were.
He turned a little toward him in response with a soft, slightly bitter chuckle. "You could have that without being my friend. I wasn't exactly playing hard to get," he pointed out. It would have been much easier if he wasn't, in fact, but Will wasn’t sure he wanted to this to stop. As painful as their conversations were, he liked them. "Your question," he added, more softly.
--
He didn't like the sound of that chuckle, too bitter for him by half. Wrapping one hand around his glass, he reached over slowly to brush the tip of his forefinger along his jaw lightly before pulling his hand back. "No, but you deserve more out of me than a kiss out of spite, Will, and I'm sorry for that." The other man deserved that from him, whether he thought so or not.
This was the most honest they had been with each other, and it wasn't the alcohol doing it. "Would you have reached out to me, if I hadn't?" He didn't care if the answer was a little painful. Their whole conversation was, as a general rule so far. What was a little more in the scheme of it all?
--
Warmth bloomed over his skin under the path of his hand. His gaze softened slightly, and he shook his head. "You already apologized, and I accepted." Will could certainly hold a grudge, but he wasn’t, not against Nick and not about that. It wasn’t how he wanted to remember kissing him though. He wasn’t sure he’d be able to talk himself out of it if he got an opportunity to do it again but better.
He met his eyes, not flinching away from the truth even if it was painful. "No. I thought about it, but I thought a clean break would be easier." He paused, teeth running gently over his bottom lip while he thought about the next question. It was by no means a safe one, but he sensed Nick would follow his lead if he turned back to easier topics. He didn’t want to cut that conversation off. "Do you really want to just be friends?" he said finally.
--
Already, he was trying to figure out kissing him again, wanting a better memory for both of them than that last disaster. Talking himself out of it wasn't even really an option in his mind. Meeting his eyes, he nodded in understanding an agreement. It would have been easier, but he wasn't sure it was the option either of them really would have preferred.
Trying not to get distracted by the want to have it be his teeth on his bottom lip, he spun his glass in his hand. "No." It wasn't what he wanted at all, but it was what he would settle for. "Am I actually going to see you again after tonight?"
--
Will didn’t choose it because he preferred it. He chose it because he was self-punishing and he’d already inflicted enough of himself on Nick. Except, apparently, he hadn’t. He wasn’t expecting an apology or forgiveness. He didn’t really know what to do with either now that he had them. He didn’t need more reasons to like Nick.
That was a relief. He didn’t think friends were supposed to think about kissing their friends so often or in such detail. That question surprised him a little, however fair it might be given his behavior. "Yeah, if you want to. I don’t spend time getting to know people I'm not planning to see again. Do you want to see me again after tonight?" It was dangerously close to breaking the repeat rule, and he wouldn't blame Nick for calling him on it instead of answering it.
--
If it hadn't been for the continued presence of very select few people in his life, he would have said he didn't know how to have friends. But he did stand by his opinion that more of the work was done on their end than his own. He certainly didn't think of kissing, say, Fiyero, the way he thought of with Will, though. His answer made curiosity rise, but he wasn't going to prod just yet.
"I do. I reached out to you," he reminded him with a slow smile before taking a drink. "Do you have anyone from your home here?" He had to get away from the dangerous questions that made him want to step over to him and correct that last disastrous kiss, otherwise he was going to give in to the urge. It was also not a question he was going to ask because he wasn't quite ready to hear that Will wanted him to keep his hands to himself.
--
Will didn’t really have friends either. There was Marian, who he liked and protected, but that was always going to be complicated with her dating his brother. He liked his boss and mentor at the garage, but again, that was a different relationship. That mostly left O'Malley, a guy he occasionally chatted or had drinks with. That fact that he'd done that more than once seemed to put him in the friend category.
Will shrugged but let it go. He could have reached out just because he felt bad. It didn't mean it would go past this. The truth was that it was getting more obviously stupid all the time for either of them to continue with this. "Marian. My half-brother's ex-girlfriend, which is as complicated as it sounds. I like her more than him though." That was a whole separate trauma to unpack, but it wasn’t Marian's fault that Robin was... Robin. He tried not to hold it against her and knew he didn't always succeed. "Who do you miss most from home?"
--
Nick didn't spend too much time feeling guilty without a very good reason, normally. It was an exhausting drain that didn't really have a place. There was no denying this wasn't a very intelligent choice, continuing this, but neither of them were calling it quits either. It was a curious predicament. He pulled a face at his answer, unable to help the reaction. "That's... a lot," he finally simply said.
The question made him blink and pause, unsure if he really had the right to miss anyone. "Fiyero," he finally said, "Dorothy, too, even if she wasn't actually from home." He knew that things might be a little easier for Leo if they were here too. "What's one thing you absolutely hate?"
--
"Yeah. It's not her fault though. And she's... good." It took him a moment to settle on the word, but it was the one he wanted. Marian was a good person, which was why she really shouldn't have too much to do with Will. He couldn’t help checking in on her though. It was a strange world, and nobody else they knew was here. She was doing well for herself without anybody's help.
He paused to think about that because there were a lot of things Will hated. People who abused their power, the sheriff and his minions, black and white morality, his brother. Nick knew about most of those already though. "I hate that no matter what world I'm in, the most vulnerable people suffer the most. If you're old, sick, poor, or god forbid all three, you're fucked. Nobody cares. Nobody helps, even if they can." He deliberately left single mothers off his list, although he counted them. It was too telling. "If anything were possible here, what's one thing you would want to do?"
--
"Ah," he murmured in understanding. Having a good person involved in something complicated usually only made it more so for the person it was complicated for. Already, based on what he knew of Will, he figured that her being good was complicated for him all on its own, let alone her connection to his brother.
That answer wasn't the answer of a bad man, by any stretch of the imagination, but he wasn't going to be the one to say so, not in that particular moment. He agreed with most of it, though. Where he didn't was where he had the missing pieces to prove that some people helped, even if they paid a price. The question only made one answer spring to mind. "Give Leo his family back," he murmured softly before taking a drink. His wouldn't recognize what was left of him, so there was no point. "Do you have family, besides the half-brother?"
--
Will had paid for it too and had the scars to prove it. It was nothing like Nick's though, and he’d be grateful the Sheriff of Nottingham didn't have much in the way of imagination. Nick's answer was by no means the answer of a bad person either, and the significance wasn’t lost on him. He’d like to hear more about his friends--all three of them that he’d mentioned--but tonight was about getting to know him.
"No. My mother died when I was fifteen. I never knew my father. It would have damaged his reputation to acknowledge her, or me. Robin was his real son." There was no obvious emotion when he spoke about the man, but that was telling enough all by itself. That anger and bitterness ran so deep it was just a part of him.
No matter what, they seemed to return to serious topics, and there was an obvious reason for that. They were both sad bastards with a pile of trauma each. His gaze flicked to him again, a bit of mischief sparking in it as he smiled, the only warning he was about to lean into that natural recklessness and say something he shouldn't. "Best sex you ever had?"
--
Hearing such a flat answer when it came to family should have been surprising, but it really did answer a lot about Will without having to touch various topics. "Don't you just love nobility or just money," he drolled out, "Very little actually noble to found except their titles." He had no fondness for anyone of rank in Oz, never really had. Corruption or just selfishness always seemed everywhere.
Nick wore his trauma like a second skin, quite literally in some ways. Bouncing between seriousness and flirtation with Will didn't really surprise him any more after their conversations. The question should have been playful and gotten playful in return, would have, but for that pile of trauma. Instead, for the first time all night, Nick drank. As he lowered the glass, he smiled slowly, "Favorite time you got away with a steal."
--
For someone who flirted as well as Nick did and kissed him without warning at dinner, that wasn’t the answer he was expecting. Silence said plenty, and that was concerning all on its own. It wasn’t the first time Will had wondered if his advances were just making him uncomfortable, but it was enough to make him decide to call it quits on that for now. Maybe friendship really was the best option for them.
The question made him laugh softly, and he shook his head. "I don't have a favorite. That's not why I do it. When I was a kid, it was just survival, and then it was about helping other people survive. It all runs together after a while." He wasn’t a millionaire, and they could afford to give a little more. He sipped slowly from his drink. "Which is better: a lie that protects or a truth that hurts?"
--
Talking about sex in general never bothered him, talking about it with Will on his mind was dangerous. Talking about his past with it was complicated, and more than a little painful at points. He needed to figure out a way to clarify that for him without dragging them into another awkward pit. He liked Will's advances, wanted more of them, really.
He hummed softly at his answer, and it really told him so much about what he needed to know about the man. It just solidified that he knew he would do a lot to protect him, like he did others like him, and had for longer than he had been in London. "A truth that hurts, every time." He wasn't one for lying, and that sort of protection always fell apart. His eyes slid over him, darkening a little with the question on his mind, "Having, being had, or switching?" He couldn't help the question with the way the man made him want to pin him against a wall.
--
This game wasn't going to work for that conversation. Will wanted to know anything Nick wanted to tell him, but he didn’t know the right questions to ask. With him having sidestepped one already, he wasn't going to pry in that direction. Whatever they were doing here, it wasn’t that. The implications were plenty though, and the fire that constantly simmered in him had noticed. He wanted to burn down anyone who'd ever hurt him.
He wasn't expecting him to turn the conversation back in that direction, and his eyebrows went up, even with the inviting smile that spread across his lips. He clearly didn't mind him asking. "Switching. But not a deal-breaker either way." He could roll with what other people were comfortable with, since he didn’t have a lot of lines of his own in that area. "Favorite position?" It was testing a theory as much as it was a question, that the off-limits topic wasn't sex so much as the past. Will of all people could respect that.
--
He wasn't sure how much about him Will wanted to actually know. Sure, he figured he'd take the light parts, the sexier parts, but the darkness? The painful? Those he wasn't sure on and he wouldn't subject anyone to those who didn't actually want to be around him in the long-term. They weren't anything he even liked discussing with the very, very few people that had stayed.
He smiled slowly at his reaction, pleased to have caught him by surprise with the question. "Perfect," he murmured, a little dark and heated, for all that he tried to bank it. "Considering how often I've wanted to have you wrapped around me and pinned to a wall in the last forty-eight hours, I think it's safe to say we can go with that." He took a sip of his drink as he watched him for his reaction.
--
He wasn't sure of that either. He could hardly blame Nick for being hesitant to open up when at every turn, Will gave the impression he was going to walk away. He should and usually did, had even tried once already, but for whatever reason he seemed unable to make it stick. All of this opening up in a game he'd started should have sent him running, but he only wanted to be closer.
Heat slid down his spine at that look on his face, but that was nothing compared to his answer. "Jesus," he said softly, trying not to stare at him with open wanting. He had to fight down a shudder of pure need at the mental image, and he drained the rest of his drink to distract himself. If he kept drinking, he couldn't count on any good decision-making moving forward. That wasn't his best thing sober either.
--
He was willing to risk it, risk letting what few human parts remained of him. He couldn't explain why, only that he wanted to close to the other man. Every bit of him that he was allowed, he would take, selfishly, and hoard it. It was nothing he was familiar with wanting, but he wanted it nonetheless.
Draining his own glass, he set it away from him and let his eyes slide over him again. "Now, I'm going to kiss you again, and I'm going to do it properly," he warned him as he stood up. "Then I'm going home for an ice cold shower, and I will talk to you again soon." Stepping over to him, he slid his fingers along his jaw to tip his head back and press his lips to his in a slow, deep kiss.
--
Will could have told him from experience that he wasn’t worth that. Nick might be the one missing pieces of his humanity, but Will wasn't a whole person either. He doubted there would ever be enough of him to sustain another person, and Nick deserved better than to live on scraps of whatever he could give. It was a conversation for another night, when he couldn’t dull the self-hatred with liquor and flirting.
He had no idea what kind of game they were playing anymore, and the conversation hadn't clarified things any more than that comment did. It wasn’t a question and didn't seem to invite Will's input on the matter, although the only thing he would have argued was leaving him for the night. No attachments. What a fucking joke. He tipped his head, sinking easily into that kiss, and it was arguably better than the first one. He couldn’t let himself get too lost in it, knowing where the lines were tonight. "Goodnight, Nick," he said quietly when they parted.
there was one prize i’d cheat to win | nick & will
@animpracticalheart
As strange as Will found this world, there were decent things about it. For one, he was no longer a wanted man hiding out in the forest with a half-brother he could barely tolerate. His apartment was a shithole by modern standards, but it was easily the nicest place he'd ever lived, and there'd been no sign of Robin at all in the city. He wasn't sure if that was good or not. Much as he wanted to hate him, he'd been doing a lot of good for their people, and this city wasn't without its problems either. Will didn't have a band of Merry Men to shake down London's rich, but he'd been pick-pocketing since he was a kid. It was a hard habit to break, not that he was trying. He never stole from people on his side of town or from anyone who didn't look like they could afford to give a little.
He also never kept anything he stole. He didn't need it. He had a perfectly fine job as a mechanic, and it paid for everything he needed and then some. He was lucky not to need much. But there were people in his building, on his street, on his side of town, who couldn't put food on the table for their kids or afford their medicine, and he couldn't sit by and do nothing. Will wasn't his brother. He wasn't taking on the sheriff and the royalty and god knew what else to fix all of London's problems. But he could do this much. He could help when he saw that help was needed, and try not to land his ass back in a cell in the meantime.
He had more than enough to go around after a morning of wandering through London's business district with sticky fingers, wallets tossed into garbage bins here and there as he went. By the time he got home, there wouldn't be so much as a five dollar bill left on him, but he had a couple more stops to make first. He paused to talk to the man camped outside a gas station--his name was Jake, and he was a really nice war veteran--and pet his dog, pressing a couple folded bills into his hand before he left. He could practically feel eyes on him as he crossed the street, and he tossed a look over his shoulder, eyes narrowed as he searched for the source.
--
This world was interesting to him, and he couldn't help but be fascinated. He had always thought that the more people you were surrounded by, the more seen you would be. The opposite seemed to be the case here. London was busier than the Emerald City ever seemed to be, and yet he managed to get by practically invisible. Well, he did once he dressed to cover metal, but even before, gazes would skate across him, not really looking at him persay. He was more used to that than he would admit.
It was easy enough to get a job here, helping people, the bearing of a soldier helping smooth the way. That didn't mean he always liked his job. He was learning the hard way that the law of this land wasn't always right, and he didn't like how it made things hard for people just trying to survive. But then, law was like that everywhere, he knew. He missed his friends and stayed away from the area where accents were too posh and everyone seemed a little too full of themselves. Arrogance suited no one, and someone as much metal as man had to be especially careful.
He noticed people, especially ones that looked like they didn't want to be. Habit, he supposed, from his days serving Ozma as a soldier. He didn't mean to watch so intently, the rugged kindness making him curious. The glance over the man's shoulder had his lips twitching, wondering if he'd felt him watching and he arched an eyebrow, simply shrugging to himself as he forced himself to start walking again.
--
Will had always considered the law more of a friendly suggestion than an actual rule, which was probably why he had the Sheriff's scars all over him. The punishments here weren't so violent, or so he'd heard. He wasn't in any hurry to test the theory by getting caught, though he'd like to see a regular jail cell that could hold him. Overall, this world seemed a lot kinder than his, but there was suffering everywhere.
Maybe his luck was running out though. The guy watching him had soldier or police or various civil servant written all over him. Will never minded a handsome stranger looking at him though, and the grin he shot back was a little wicked and full of mischief. It all but dared him to call him out on something. He was careful, but not that careful. He couldn't say for sure how long he'd been watching.
--
The law wasn't always right, and that knowledge had added to Nick's scars and substitutions. He'd developed a terrible habit of doing what he knew was right rather than what the law called for, and it rarely put him in a good spot with his superiors. When he'd read the punishments here for breaking the law, he'd breathed a little easier at knowing he wouldn't lose any more pieces of himself. He didn't consider himself a paragon of virtue by any means.
The look he shot him sent pink spreading across his cheeks and up to his ears, but he couldn't help the small smile in return. He hadn't expected a handsome stranger to get flirty at him today... or ever, really. Clearing his throat for himself, he took a deep breath and tried to shake off the fluster.
--
That was a better reaction than Will had been hoping for. Actually, if he'd had ten guesses looking at the handsome stranger, embarrassment wouldn't have made the list. A part of him knew he had no business touching something that shy and sweet and broken, and if a guy that gorgeous didn't know he was gorgeous, then he was definitely broken.
That didn't stop him from slowing his steps so he could catch up, his smile toning down into something more straightforwardly friendly. He could never manage to chase all the mischief out of it, but he could always bring the charm back later if only to see that lovely shade of pink again. "Hi," he said simply, when he was close enough for conversation.
--
There was no part of him that he could claim was whole, untarnished, or even remotely likable by most people. He had learned how to live with it, to be comfortable in his rivets and skin, even enjoy it after a while. He wasn't the most charming, the most handsome, both of those were Fiyero and that was perfectly okay by him. He didn't see the need to have feelings for anyone, not after what other people's emotions had caused.
He blinked slightly as he caught up to him, noticing the shift in smile and relaxing slightly at it. "Hi," he greeted carefully in return. "I'm Nick," he offered his hand to him with a slightly quirked eyebrow.
--
Will was perfectly capable of being charming when he wanted to be, but that was more due to being a con artist than being actually likeable. He didn't give most people the chance to know him well enough to like him or not. It was better to keep it simple, help where he could, and keep to himself otherwise. He'd always been good on his own. That brief feeling of belonging with the Merry Men had been the biggest lie of all, and he saw no reason to look for that again.
"Will. Nice to meet you." He took the offered hand and couldn't help smiling at the formality of it. "You don't sound like you're from around here, Nick. What brings you to London?"
--
There were times here that Nick missed Fiyero, Leo, and even Dorothy fiercely. They were the ones who knew him best, where he didn't feel like he needed to tread carefully. With most people, he was careful and pulled close into himself, no chance of anything pulling him into a world he didn't belong in.
The smile made him blink slightly, tipping his head as he studied him while they shook hands. "I'm not from anywhere here," he shrugged. "I found myself here one day, I'm not entirely inclined to leave. What about you?"
--
They were already smack in the middle of a world they didn't belong in, and Will, for one, was enjoying it. This place was an improvement over his home in just about every way. Even if he missed people from home, he wouldn't have admitted it. Nobody stuck around forever. On a long enough timeline, everyone bailed eventually.
He raised an eyebrow at the look, and he couldn't help returning it. Sue him. The guy was gorgeous, and he was only human. It was his turn to tilt his head, the explanation a rather odd one, but he thought he understood. Nick wouldn't be the first person he met who didn't belong here. "Vague, but... familiar. Same, I think."
--
There was a lot that he liked about the place he'd found himself in, for all that he was mostly on his own. At least here, he was able to be more of who he wanted to be and he could leave who he'd been before in Oz. Maybe, he could even be a guy that flirted with a handsome stranger just because he could. That wasn't the worst thing he could be, really.
Having his look returned made him smile slowly and he chuckled softly. "You think?" The question was teasing as he let his hand go. "I can say with certainty that I'm not from London and I didn't choose to be here. How's that?"
--
Will would very much love to help him test out those skills of flirting with handsome strangers. He was something of an expert. He couldn't quite get a read on whether it was welcomed or not though. Nick wasn't really flirting back, but he didn't seem put off by it. Will thought it might even be interest there, but he couldn't be sure. He loved flirting, and he loved poking at people, but purposely making someone uncomfortable with his advances wasn't usually a line he crossed.
"Once in a while. Just enough to get me in trouble." He grinned like he was made of trouble as he took his hand back. "I might be from London, or close enough. But it didn't look anything like this," he chuckled softly, still a little in disbelief over all of it. Being somewhere one minute, and somewhere--sometime--completely different another. "Would you want to go back, if you could?" He could let him keep his vague answers for now, or forever if he wanted. He was more curious about the present man than the past.
--
His head was full of 'do I, don't I' and weighing who he'd been against who he thought he might want to be, how he might want to be. That urge to be able to flirt with a handsome stranger was rapidly winning with every smile out of the man. If he wanted his life to be different than it had been in Oz, he had to let it be, right? The pure trouble in that smile made his final decision for him, and his smile shifted slightly. "Trouble can be fun," he agreed, thinking that was exactly what Will looked like.
Laughing, he nodded in understanding, "I'm not used to anything like London. Emerald City was big, but still very different." Everything was different, and the way he'd completely changed places was never going to fail to baffle him. "Back? No, I really don't think I do," he admitted, because there he couldn't just flirt with a handsome man, most of them were soldiers he was in charge of.
--
He could practically watch that conflict on his face. Will didn't know exactly what it was about, but it was clear he was coming to some kind of decision, and he was interested to see what it was. The smile he ended up with was more promising. "It usually is," he agreed with a soft chuckle. He'd been in some much less fun trouble back at home, but so far, it didn't seem to have followed him here.
"It is bigger. Faster. Louder. The technology? Way ahead of anything we had. The food's a lot better too." This place was an improvement over his home in every way. Will had no reason to want to go back, but he doubted it was up to him. It hadn't been his decision to come here in the first place. "Good to know. I don't either." He wouldn't get caught up with someone who was still attached to their home, or perhaps had someone waiting for them there. He was starting to think Nick might be the kind of person he wanted to get caught up with.
--
That soft chuckle only added to the knowledge that he was definitely making the right call. He liked the sound of it and it deepened his smile into something charming and a little devastating. "What's your preferred kind of trouble, then?" He couldn't help but ask the teasing question, his eyebrow arching slightly.
"The technology is definitely better than what I'm from," he agreed, and it made some things easier for him. "The food is definitely better. A lot more options, for sure." More and more, the place was confirming that it was entirely worth it to stay. "Good," because if he wanted to stay, then just maybe, Nick would get to see him again.
--
God. If Nick was beautiful when he was unsure of himself, he was nothing short of devastating when he decided to flirt back. That voice, that smile. Will had a feeling he wasn't the only trouble here, and his smile widened slowly as he let himself look him over. "Tall, blue-eyed, and handsome." He could take or leave the blue, but there was no denying it worked for Nick. That was an ocean he'd gladly fall into.
"I could take you to dinner, and you could tell me more about that." The words were out before he'd fully considered them, but he wasn't sorry. He rarely was, even when his mouth got him into trouble. Will wasn't really a dinner kind of guy. At most, he might go out for a drink, but he didn't do attachments. He didn't just want to take him home though. That was part of it, but he wanted to talk to him too. Maybe getting to know him would crush that curiosity. It worked with most people.
--
He tamped down hard on the shiver that wanted to go through him when Will looked him over. It was unfair that he could pull that kind of reaction out of him already and it really made Nick want to know if he could do the same. His eyes drifted slowly over him in return, that blue darkening just a little in promise, "Only fair for tall, dark, and more than a little roguish."
The invitation made him laugh softly, even as it turned his ears a little pink. "Deal," he agreed, shifting a little further into his space. He wanted to get to know him. He wanted to chase down that warmth that their flirting put in him. Being able to talk to someone he found attractive was almost novel these days. The potential of acting on that attraction? Even more so.
--
He liked Nick's eyes on him. He already knew he wanted his hands on him, but he'd settle for eyes right now. "You tellin' me you got a type?" He raised an eyebrow, his grin an invitation and a dare. One he hoped Nick would take. Plenty of people had a thing for the bad ones, and he was fine to play into that. Sometimes, he could even convince himself that was all there was to him.
He shifted closer when he did, until he could feel the warmth of his body without touching him. "No feelings," he cautioned, meeting those beautiful blue eyes. "No attachment. Nobody gets hurt." Will knew he had a tendency to hurt people just by being who he was. Even being absolutely clear about where he stood going into it, it still sometimes happened. He didn't want to hurt Nick, but he didn't want to walk away from him either.
--
The question, the invitation and dare in it, was something he couldn't ignore. Not because of any 'bad boy' vibe, which wasn't really what he got from him, trouble, sure, and plenty of it. "Right now? Sure. You." The words were a husky murmur that he didn't even bother to hide.
When he shifted closer, his eyes narrowed slightly and something sharp glittered in them. He shifted to press him slowly closer to the wall. His eyes drifted over him slowly, a blatant perusal that also gave him a moment to gather his thoughts. "You can have dinner, or you can have no attachment," he finally said bluntly. He wanted him, and he wouldn't deny that . He also intrigued him, which made him want more than a night of him being around. He could ignore the heat in the name of getting to know him, and he was used to not getting to know intriguing people. "I say that, because if you think I'll only want you once, something tells me that wouldn't be the case."
--
Will had to fight down a shiver at the sound of his voice like that. He’d liked teasing the uncertain version of Nick. He wasn’t prepared for him now that he'd decided where he stood. He liked those edges on him. The part of him that never let himself be pinned in a corner flashed him a warning sign, but he let him back him into the wall. He didn’t mind the closeness itself, and he shoved that paranoid voice into a box to examine never.
That answer did nothing to reassure him that they were on the same page. If Will was smart, he'd walk away from this right now. Unfortunately, he was an established idiot. "I didn't say once. I said don't fall in love with me." He returned the slow once-over, ending on those so blue eyes with an arch to his eyebrow, a clear challenge in it. He had to tuck his hands behind him to keep them off him. Much as he wanted to touch him, it wouldn't be fair. Not yet.
--
One day, Nick would be able to be flirted with and not get all twisted up at first. He wasn't used to just being randomly flirted with, but with the way this was going, he might actually get past that. Knowing exactly where he stood on the idea was a headspace he had always preferred. The heat of him so close was horribly tempting.
"Lucky for you, I'm not exactly known for a heart," the words were murmured and a little dark, self-deprecating humor that so few people would really understand. Reaching up slowly, he tucked a single finger under his chin. "Dinner, Will."
--
Will would have to stop breathing to stop flirting. It was as much a defense mechanism as anything, a way to keep people off balance and at a distance, even as it seemed like he was inviting them closer. Never close enough to hurt him though. He wanted to close that small space between them, to have all that warmth pressed against him, but it wouldn't kill him not to have it. Not yet.
"Your heart's not what I want from you," he assured him with a soft chuckle. Will had entirely too *much* heart. From his perspective, it was the source of most of his problems. His life would be a lot easier if he didn't care so much. He couldn't risk it on another person, so it was better to just take it out of the equation.
That wasn't the choice he'd thought he would make. He'd more than half-expected Nick to heed the warning and walk away, or take advantage of the offer and then cut his losses. He still wasn't sure they'd reached any sort of agreement, but he wasn't going to argue with that voice. He raised the phone he'd stolen from him and texted himself with a time and place before sliding it slowly back into his pocket. "Then I'll see you at dinner."
--
No one stayed or he chose not to keep them long enough for him to get hurt. It was simpler that way, for hearts to not enter the picture. He couldn't exactly blame him for the request, and the truth was that Nick wasn't even sure he even had one after everything. "Good, that makes things easier." Something said it wouldn't make him like it any more when Will walked away, but that was alright.
He could have taken the warning and walked away, but he wanted his life to be different. So much tightly wound control wasn't entirely necessary anymore. His smile was slow at the sight of his phone in Will's hand, for some reason entirely unsurprised by it. There was a lot to the man, he was rapidly learning. "I'll see you then."
--
It took effort not to steal a kiss while he was close, but in this one instance, Will didn't want something he had to steal. He wanted Nick to kiss him on purpose when he was damn good and ready, and he’d enjoy the wait. The only reason he was able to walk away from him was with the promise of seeing him later, although he fully realized it gave the man plenty of time to change his mind between now and then. If he was smart, he would. Will had his number saved in his phone, but if he didn't show tonight, he'd erase it and forget he ever had it.
In the meantime, he had errands to run, mostly for the people in his building and the surrounding area. He never kept the money he stole. It was damning, for one thing, if he ever got caught, but that just wasn't the reason he did it. He wasn’t selfless enough to say it wasn't about him. He definitely got something out of it that he couldn’t explain to himself and didn't like to examine too closely, but it wasn’t cash.
He was on time to dinner, and he’d surprised himself by inviting Nick to one of his favorite places. It was tucked away on the edge of the water in Mermaid Lagoon. It wasn’t fancy or expensive--he didn’t think either of them would enjoy that--but the atmosphere was nice, and the food was great. Maybe he should have gone with something less personal, but hell, he didn’t do dinner. He was already down the rabbit hole.
--
After leaving Will and having plans, there was a part of him that wished for someone to talk to who would understand, that knew his hangups and missing pieces. But at the same time, he just held onto the hope that they were together and okay. Going home, he was glad for the time to clean up and get some sleep before going out. Even better was knowing he was off for a few days so his rest schedule could be skewed for a night.
He'd looked at where he'd been invited and liked the vibe of it, relaxed and somewhere he didn't feel he had to be so careful. Seeing Nick, he smiled slowly as he walked over to meet him. He didn't spend much time out at restaurants, so if this went horribly sideways, his favorite spots would be safe. He wouldn't lie to himself and say he wasn't relieved to see him, but it wasn't anything he felt the need to say out loud, either.
--
It shouldn't be this nice to see him already, but the truth was that he hadn’t really wanted to leave him in the first place. He still had no idea if dinner was a bad call, but he knew he wanted to be around Nick. It was unusual for Will, since for all the time he spent around people, he often preferred his own company. Safer that way.
"Hey." He gave him an easy smile, no comments about being surprised to see him, although he was a little. When they’d been seated and had their drink orders taken, he let out a soft chuckle, glancing around. "Weird. I've never done this before," he admitted. He’d eaten in restaurants since he got here, but not often and never as a date. Courting was different at home.
--
It made no sense for him to be this happy to see him already, but knowing that he didn't want to leave him earlier, it made sense. He wanted to get to know Will, whatever of him he'd be allowed to learn, because he was sure that he had rules on that too. It wasn't as though he could say anything against keeping people at arm's length anyway. He did it, too.
"Hey," it was easy to let him see the smile as they were taken to a table, offering his drink order when asked. His eyebrow raised slowly, but he couldn't say he was exactly surprised. "I haven't either," he admitted with a slow shrug. Even at home, what he'd done couldn't be called dating or courting, because it was very, very far from it, and it had been rare.
--
Will wasn’t sure exactly where his lines were with Nick. The man had thrown him off balance from their first conversation, and he was already breaking his rules by being here. He was sort of hoping this dinner would put things in perspective for him. He was a little afraid he didn't want so many boundaries with him, and that was a stupid, reckless thing to want with a near total stranger. Unfortunately, stupid and reckless were two of his favorite things.
He raised a slow eyebrow in return, equally unsurprised. He wanted to ask why he'd chosen dinner in the first place then and didn't know where to take the conversation if not in that direction. He regretted the impulsive honesty already. He didn’t do this. There was a fucking reason he didn't do this. He knew he could walk out and Nick would let him and that would be the end of it, but somehow the idea of never seeing him again was worse than sitting here being awkward. He drew a slow breath, his gaze flicking away as their waiter returned with drinks, and he thanked them softly.
--
He let his eyes drift over him, studying him carefully. He really was a beautiful man and there were far worse choices for ways to spend his night. Nick wasn't one for taking things from people that they didn't want to give him. The line in the sand against love had set off enough bells and kept him surprised that he'd offered dinner at all.
Giving their waiter an easy smile, he thanked them and slid his menu to the edge of the table. Ordering his food, he was content to let Will have another moment couched in being polite to their server. At least that way, he could actually focus on him without interruption. When they were alone again, he leaned back in his seat with a slow smile. "How do you get better to look at the second time I see you?"
--
It was easier to put his focus on ordering food rather than second guessing, oh... all of his life choices. This wasn’t the time for an existential crisis. It would be a lie to say Will wasn’t one for introspection though. He was fully aware of why he was the way he was. He’d just never seen any reason to change it. His rules kept him alone, but he was comfortable alone. It wasn't safe because nowhere was safe, but it was something.
He'd more or less wrangled all of that back into its box by the time their server walked away, and Nick's comment made it easy to slide back into that cocky charmer, his grin quick and full of mischief. "It's a gift. One we share, apparently." He looked entirely too good to be true, and Will had no doubt that he was. It wasn’t just that though. There was something about him that made him want to look closer, the same man who would blush at a compliment and then be confident enough to back him into a wall.
--
Will's face was a fascinating study for him, the way it shifted so carefully. He knew what compartmentalization looked like as it happened, he'd utilized it for years to keep himself alive. Well, living, at least, alive felt like a different connotation entirely. He had often looked at Dorothy, at Fiyero and Leo and wondered if that was all what alive was really like.
That grin, full of charm and mischief, was something he enjoyed the sight of even as he felt it was an armor all its own. He knew all about hiding behind something. "Do we?" His smile deepened slightly as he watched him. "I hope your time earlier was well used."
--
Most people didn’t care enough about what Will said or did to watch his face that closely. He had no idea how much he was giving away, but he was unmoored enough to know that it was something. More than he meant to. He had no idea why Nick was still sitting there, purposely involving himself with an admitted mess.
"Are you fishing for compliments? Because I can work with that." He let his gaze travel slowly over him, his smile equally slow. It was hard to think of one thing he could find fault with. The man was carved out of stone. "If you're asking what I was doing, then I decline to comment," he laughed softly. He might own up to what he did at some point over the evening, but not that easily. Not when it was badly incriminating. "But its use definitely wasn't as good as this one."
--
To be fair, most people that probably spent time watching Will's face weren't trained the way that Nick was. Beyond that, it was just a beautiful face and he really enjoyed looking at it. Right now, he saw no reason to prod at anything he saw there unless Will gave him a reason. Something told him that he would rather he didn't.
"Oh no, I don't do fishing," he chuckled lightly, his eyes teasing. He didn't mind being under his eyes but he wondered if his gaze would stay the same later. His eyebrow raised slightly at him and he shrugged, "Your choice. You don't owe me anything." It did deepen the curiosity, but he considered it just another line drawn by the other man and they were rapidly adding up. "Then I'll have to make sure it stays that way."
--
Will was exceptional at deflecting other people's prying. He could not answer questions for days and only come off rude if he meant to. He wasn’t sure he wanted to play that game with Nick, and he kind of doubted he'd tolerate it for long anyway. He’d already proven himself good at cutting through bullshit. Admitting to a crime was a little more forthcoming than he wanted to be though.
Why would you want to? He bit down the first reply that came to mind because Nick had put it clearly. They didn't owe each other anything, not even an explanation of why they were here. "I don't think that'll be hard for you," he said instead, keeping the easy smile. "Tell me more about yourself?" It was a request for whatever he felt comfortable sharing rather than any specific questions.
--
Nick spent a lot of time having to cut through bullshit, had for a long time it felt like. He was known for being able to analyze a person quickly, detached and factual. Nick came across as the kind of person who wanted nothing to do with any of that. In this, he didn't see a reason to prod where he clearly wasn't wanted.
The easy smile had him fighting the urge to raise an eyebrow, wondering just how much he hid behind it. It wasn't good for him, wanting to know so much and having the feeling he wouldn't get to. His head tipped slightly at the request, considering for a moment. "There isn't much," he shrugged lightly, having thrown himself into a job he barely liked but knew he was good at rather than facing the fact that he was alone. "I was a woodsman, once, fugitive and soldier." He wasn't sure which of them he preferred, if any.
--
"We have something in common already. Two out of three isn't bad." His smile was slow and slightly wicked. He'd let Nick guess which of the two it was, although it was probably obvious that Will had never been a soldier. A boxer and a bowman, but never an official part of the King's army. Those were more survival skills, anyway. Someone as proficient in pissing people off as he was had to be able to defend himself.
"And now?" He couldn't help noticing that all of those were in the past tense. There wasn't much cause for being a woodsman in a city, or a soldier in a city it wasn't possible to leave. He'd had to do some reassessing when he got here, since none of his past skills were particularly useful here. He'd always been good with his hands though, and he liked the comparatively steady income at the garage. It was more stability than he'd ever had in his life.
--
It didn't really surprise him to hear that parts of their pasts were similar enough. He could tell he had never been a soldier, would have probably done everything not to be (not that Nick could blame him). Not everyone was meant to follow someone else's instructions, and some could, just not for long.
The question made him huff out a soft, self-deprecating bit of laughter. "Now, I'm lucky I have a job because I never fail to say when the law is absolute bullshit," he shrugged. At least here, the consequences for that weren't quite so damaging to his sense of self. "Better that than a blindered cop, though." He couldn't stand the ones who refused to see the grey, or even the humanity. Which, that one was amusing to him, because most would consider him far less than human if they knew.
--
Following orders went directly against Will's basic makeup. That documented authority issue was part of what landed him in so much trouble. Sometimes it didn’t even matter if the rule made sense. The fact that it was a rule made him compelled to break it. He’d never yet met someone who inspired total loyalty in him. Probably never would. Robin occasionally inspired a little, much to Will's distaste, but he enjoyed fighting him on things too much.
He raised his eyebrows, not sure he liked where this was going. Nope. He definitely didn't. "You're a cop?" he clarified because it needed to be said. "Jesus Christ..." He couldn’t help a soft, disbelieving laugh at the irony of it, running a hand over his jaw as he shook his head. Fate, obviously, really had it in for him. He couldn’t even say he was surprised. His life was always fucking like this. He should stop this now. Pay for dinner and walk away. It was more reckless than even Will usually was to stay.
--
He watched his face carefully, knowing how some people reacted to police officers. He'd had the feeling that Will would be one of them, but it didn't entirely prepare him for it. The reality was that there was very little that translated into skills for him to get a different job. Private security didn't get hired with no background.
"I can leave," he offered, scooting his chair back slightly. He certainly wasn't going to stay somewhere and in company that clearly didn't want him. "I'm more than my job, Will," his voice was stern, unmoving and a little cold. He knew it was where he always fell when he was trying to protect what was left of himself, what hadn't been broken into pieces and thrown away.
--
If he hadn’t already admitted it, that voice would have been a dead giveaway. Something inside him went dark and steely in response, but it wasn’t cold like Nick's. It was always fire with Will. It got him into trouble, but it protected him too because no matter what the Sheriff of Nottingham and his torture buddies chipped away from him, they couldn't take that. He also knew--at least in a hypothetical sense--that it was different here. He didn't know if he'd say it was better, but it wasn’t just one evil man with his thumb on everything.
"That's not it." His voice was surprisingly gentle despite the flash of fire in his eyes. It wasn’t hard to see that he’d misstepped, and he had the odd sense that he might have even hurt him. Not exactly surprising. Will tended to hurt people just by being himself. He didn’t want to leave it like that with him though. It was a stupid and reckless thing to admit, but he deserved a little honesty.
"I'm a thief, Nick. That's why it would be incriminating for me to tell you where I was today, or what I was doing. Doesn't that create some sort of conflict of interest for you?" His smile was slow and a little self-mocking. He fully expected him to finish leaving. It would be safer for both of them to shake hands and part ways. But damn, he would be sorry to see him go.
--
He was surprised by the difference in what he heard in Will's voice versus what he saw in his face. Nick wasn't an easy person to hurt, he rarely cared enough to be hurt. That he had felt the need to be stern with him, to reinforce that it wasn't all he was, told him that this was even more dangerous to him than he had thought. None of this was anything he had expected when he'd met him just hours before.
Pushing up from his chair, he walked around the table without a word. Leaning down, he wrapped a hand in the front of his shirt gently and leaned down to brush his lips over his. "I don't give a shit right now. Do I look like I'm in uniform?" He nipped lightly at his bottom lip and pulled back, releasing his hold on him and going back to sit in his chair.
"I'm a cop here because that's easier and more palatable than anything else I could do." His eyes were full of steel as he looked at him across the table again. "And if you'd paid attention, you'd have heard that I know the law can be wrong."
--
It was already too complicated to want to stay. He’d bailed on simpler things for taking far less emotional bandwidth than this. Will wasn’t such a sucker for a pretty face that he would abandon self-preservation for it, so what stopped him from getting up and walking out right now? He couldn't have said, and he wasn’t comfortable with the conflict. He had proof now that Nick was especially dangerous to him. It wasn’t just a feeling. His life would be far easier if he wasn't the sort of person who enjoyed sticking his hand in the fire.
He braced himself for him to leave when he stood up, so he wasn't prepared for him to come closer. It would be silly to try to arrest him without any proof, even if he had just admitted it. His breath caught at the brush of lips, but he was too confused and annoyed to properly enjoy that kiss in the moment. He wasn’t above angry sex, but mixing it with serious conversation was too hard to follow. He was sure his brain was going to play it back for him later though.
He buried that mix of emotions as Nick took his seat again and leaned back in his own chair, that cheeky troublemaker persona once again wrapped around him like a blanket. "Fuck off with your lecture voice. I heard you. It doesn't matter what you know. It matters what you do." Obeying a law he knew was wrong was worse, in Will's mind. The corner of his mouth turned up in a smile, his head tilting slightly in acknowledgement. "But I don't know enough about what that is to judge you for it, so." It wasn’t an apology, but it was as close as he would get.
--
The kiss wasn't meant for him to really enjoy. It was a terrible way of making a point, but he couldn't really resist it. He couldn't bring himself to walk away, even knowing that he should. He didn't have a good reason to remain here, to stay with Will. He couldn't understand why he didn't feel like leaving was the appropriate option.
His eyebrow raised further, "And I'm lucky I have a job, so." He rolled his eyes because he spent more time in an office being written up already than he did actually doing what was supposed to be his job. At least it wasn't losing more flesh for metal, but it still took its toll. "No, you don't." He wasn't sure that Will would try. He wasn't even sure why he wished he would.
--
If the point was that he was staying, then it spoke loudly enough. Will was still trying to decide if he was mad about it, but it was tangled up with the rest of his feelings. He wanted to kiss Nick. He didn’t know if he wanted to be kissed in this context. He didn’t come away with a nice feeling about it, so that probably meant he didn't. Actually, this whole thing felt shitty, and it had pretty much from the moment he got here.
He drew a slow breath, his jaw clenching on an answer. The truth was that neither of them knew the other. At all. Full stop. He didn't know what kind of cop Nick was any more than Nick knew why this conversation put a tight knot in his stomach or made the scars on his back ache. "For the record, you don't know anything about me either." He stood, tucking a couple bills on the table to pay for dinner. He didn’t want to be here right now, and most of it had nothing to do with Nick. This was a failed experiment. He knew better, but he’d done it anyway, and he couldn’t fucking breathe in here.
Will had not been prepared for the way last night had gone, and it was nearly lunch by the time he and Nick finally made it back to the bookstore. He'd promised Fiyero he would come by in the morning, and while circumstances had changed since then and he likely wouldn't remember anyway, Will tried to keep his promises to him. It seemed like taking advantage to just assume he would forget, and there was always the off chance he would remember and the absence would confuse him more.
Besides, there were a couple of conversations he needed to have. He pointed at Leo with that no bullshit sergeant's look on his face. "You. Stay outta my business." Leo chuckled and gave him a little salute and a *you got it, sarge,* and Will considered them good. Unlike Dorothy, Leo knew exactly what he'd done and why it was wrong. He didn't expect him to meddle again. Dorothy, on the other hand, was going to require explaining. He pointed at her and tipped his head toward the apartment. "You. Let's have a chat." It wasn't a suggestion, and for once she didn't argue with him.
It took time to explain to Dorothy exactly what was wrong with what she'd done and how it mattered that she hurt everyone even if the results happened to be good. She was a smart kid, fully capable of reasoning, but she fell a little short on empathy at times. He could tell by the end that he'd gotten through to her though, and while he wasn't sure that was remorse--which was asking rather a lot from Dorothy--there was understanding. He also explained that he'd be spending a few nights a week here, and Nick would be spending a few with him, and while she didn't look particularly happy about that part, at least she didn't argue.
He hugged her so she'd know they were good and went to find Fiyero and hug him too. He still wasn't overly pleased with their antics, but they were his family, and he loved them. He made his way back to Nick, giving in to the urge to lean into him and press a kiss to that perfect jaw. "You got work to do, or you wanna get out of here?" They'd planned to spend the day together, but that was before they'd spent a whole night and morning together. If he had things to catch up on, Will wouldn't be a brat about it.
