Soliciting advice…
There’s a family that’s been in my 13yo’s class for years and years, so we know them a fair bit and are friendly but not close. The mom is Black (I believe she has a Black mom and a white dad) and the dad is white, we’ll call the daughter X.
I try to be as antiracist a parent as I can, so when my 13yo today said, “Sigh, X always makes everything about race,” I immediately bristled and started challenging that narrative. He reads me what she posted in the class group chat: “las personas blancas siempre ganan.” My immediate reaction is, “Well, that’s pretty true, right?” And he goes, “But mom!!” Then he shows me the context in the group chat. 3-4 of the kids had been chatting about something.
X: Do you guys have to chat here where everyone can see it? I don’t want to have to wade through all these messages
So the other 12-13yos respond in exactly the manner you’d expect in this situation, saying that anyone who wants to can join in the discussion, they don’t expect people to back read, you can turn off notifications, etc
X: las personas blancas siempre ganan [leaves the class group chat]
Two questions. 1) Would you reach out to X’s mom to chat about this? Not in an aggressive way but in an effort to discuss how to help both our kids approach this in a healthy way. And 2) Any ideas about how to help my white kid to understand this in a constructive way, rather than feeling resentful about the invocation of race? 🫤
