Help me find a Destiel fic?
So, I clicked a link on Tumblr in a Destiel rec post, and found myself re-reading a pretty angsty story I really liked…
…then lost it when I passed out with my nose in my phone, because Tumblr-reader/not logged in to ao3. “No problem,” I said, “It’s a well-reviewed fic and pretty unique, I can find it on Ao3.” Bwah, ha, ha,ha.
Here’s *my* description:
Modern AU-no monster hunting, dissociative Dean POV. In the 25-30,000 word range? NO clue on the author. Not recently written.
Dean’s dropped everything in his life to take care of his dying dad - John- who has liver failure and was an abusive and absent parent. Dean is crushingly lonely and lost and hates it, but stays anyway, falling deeper and deeper into depression, until he pretty much stops eating. He still goes running every day, where a cute butt guy passes him regularly on his own runs (Cas). Essentially, Dean is starving himself to death, falls and breaks his arm, but tries to ignore it to go back to his dad, who has died. Cas finds him passed out, insists he get his arm seen to, and persists in showing up to help Dean cope with his dad’s death, Sam’s crappy avoidance, the house foreclosure, finding out about Adam (and that John left Adam everything but the car), and…that’s where I left off.
It’s REALLY well written, and I ’d really like to finish the re-read, but can’t find it on Ao3.
Think about it-what tags would you search for?
Destiel
depressed Dean
Canon (or minor) character death
Alcoholic or drunk or abusive John Winchester
Stanford Sam, angry Sam, Sam is an asshole
Eating issues, starvation
Dissociation, grief, loss, angst, suicidal references
Bobby and Ellen are in it
From what I remember of the initial read, I think this *maybe* gets as far as a kiss so I’m not sure if the author tagged it as slash or &
Except for Modern AU (or Modern era, no monsters or similar tag) I’m describing the entire damn canon and even with that tag, it’s like 1/3 of the fanfic. Assuming the author even tagged it the way I remember it…
HELP?!
