#aragon

[phantom-threaded]

The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring 2001, dir. Peter Jackson

[illustratus]

The Battle of Toro 1476 (detail) by José Daniel Cabrera Peña

[felifiran]

Do you think Legolas ever made references from 300+ years earlier

Just completely forgetting that 7 of the other 8 members of the Fellowship were not around to witness whatever thing he was referencing

Legolas: The sky is as dark as the Great Eclipse of 2490, what terror that wrought! How did you fare during that terrible month?

Aragorn: ???? 7 generations of my family have lived and died since then ????

It would definitely make Legolas sad as 2490 was like a week ago and it would put into perspective the brevity of mannish / dwarfish / hobbit lives

On a much lighter note, maybe Legolas tried to make pop culture references to them all, but his references were 300+ years out of date so they all called him grandad

[aceofmoxes]

The Mouth of Sauron versus Trump

Sauron: The rabble of Gondor and its deluded allies shall withdrawal at once beyond Anduin

Trump: Ukrainian forces will withdraw from the part of Donetsk Oblast that they currently control, and this withdrawal zone will be considered a neutral demilitarised buffer zone, internationally recognised as territory belonging to the Russian Federation NATO agrees not to station troops in Ukraine.

Sauron: The alliance will take oaths never again to assail Sauron the Great in Arms, open or secret

Trump: Ukraine agrees to enshrine in its constitution that it will not join NATO, and NATO agrees to include in its statutes a provision that Ukraine will not be admitted in the future. If Ukraine invades Russia, it will lose the guarantee. If Ukraine launches a missile at Moscow or St. Petersburg without cause, the security guarantee will be deemed invalid.

Sauron: All Lands East of Anduin shall be Sauron’s forever, solely

Trump: Crimea, Luhansk and Donetsk will be recognised as de facto Russian, including by the United States. Kherson and Zaporizhzhia will be frozen along the line of contact, which will mean de facto recognition along the line of contact.

Sauron: West of Anduin as far as the Misty Mountains and the Gap of Rohan shall be tributary to Mordor,

Trump: The US will receive compensation for the guarantee. $100 billion in frozen Russian assets will be invested in US-led efforts to rebuild and invest in Ukraine. The US will receive 50% of the profits from this venture

Sauron: the men shall bear no weapons but shall have leave to govern their own affairs

Trump: The size of the Ukrainian Armed Forces will be limited to 600,000 personnel. Ukraine's sovereignty will be confirmed.

Sauron: But they shall help rebuild Isengard which they have wantonly destroyed

Trump: The United States will cooperate with Ukraine to jointly rebuild, develop, modernise, and operate Ukraine's gas infrastructure, including pipelines and storage facilities.

Sauron: In Isengard his lieutenant shall dwell, not Saruman but one more worthy of trust

Trump: Ukraine will hold elections in 100 days. Ukraine agrees to enshrine in its constitution that it will not join NATO, and NATO agrees to include in its statutes a provision that Ukraine will not be admitted in the future.

Slava Ukraini!

Credit to WinnerSpecialist at Reddit/Noncredibledefense

Donate to defend Ukraine at UNITED24.

Tolkien understood evil.

[jay-wasstuff]

The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers (2002)

[rainbowquinoa203]

My lord of the rings headcannon is that Aragorn secretly keeps count of his kills like Legolas and Gimli and silently compares his numbers without telling them.

Aragorn after Helms Deep: “they only got 43, I got 45.”

[frankensteinsmonst3r]

LOTR but it happens in an IKEA