One Trip Wonder
I must have been an octopus in a previous life. I have spent many years mastering the art of carrying twenty shopping bags at once without assistance. Most of the time I can complete the task quite well, especially at Christmas when I'm shopping solo and believe I haven't enough purchases to warrant a trolley. For hours on end I wander aimlessly around KnifePoint until the bags begin to dig into my skin cutting off the circulation, then I have no choice but to spit the dummy and leave.
You see, I have worked out that you can use your arm like an extender-pole, sliding the bags up to increase carrying capacity. As long as the contents are relatively light and don't cause too much pressure, you should be right. Tips and Tricks #17: Remember to mix up the bags to keep the balance just right so your goods don't crash against each other causing breakage, or worse still, bust through the bottom and end up in a zillion pieces on the footpath.
In our house, I am known as the One Trip Wonder. The distance from the garage to our front door is a measly twenty-seven paces, which in reality is nothing. Except if gale force winds persist or there is torrential rain, hail, sleet or snow. Then it's not pleasant. But I still don't like multiple trips.
I know you blokes out there don't get it because you always ask us why we don't just make a second trip. But what is there to not understand. It's simple. Why make two or three trips when we only have to make one.
My motto has become this... I will carry 17 grocery bags or die trying before making two trips. Please feel free to etch that one my headstone.
Dee xx
