How do you know if your friends care about you as much as you care about them? People have their own way of showing they care, but how do you learn that and know they care?
That’s a really good question andactually a little complicated. I’ve always had a sixth sense when it comes toknowing things about others. I was just born with that. I’ve always been verygood at reading people (except when it comes to knowing if guys like me or notlol) But I think one thing that lets me know they care about me is when theycheck-up on me, want to hang out, and respect my boundaries, opinions, morals,and values. Eventually I get to a point with others where I feel totallycomfortable telling them or talking to them about anything, but it usuallytakes a very long time for me to do that because I have trust issues. Also,when they legitimately seem excited to see you is a good indicator. If you seea friend you care about deeply in public and get excited seeing them and go tosay hi and they act weird and awkward (like they feel embarrassed you’retalking to them) then they don’t care for you that much at all. Body languageis also a big part in reading people. You can tell a lot from body language. Ifthey cross their arms and step back it usually means they are trying to keepyou at a distance, literally and figuratively. Friends who care wouldn’t dosuch things, unless of course you don’t like being in close proximity withpeople and what not, but any good friend would know that. It’s really hard totell because not everybody is the same. Oh and if your friends actually keepplans with you that’s a big indicator too. Again, it varies among everybody.Some people just have difficulty keeping plans because of severe social anxietyand what not. The thing is there really isn’t a control for such things; thereare far too many variables and not enough to work off of. You can have ahypothesis, but not have enough to create a theory. But I do stand by the bodylanguage and speech pattern are very good ways to figure that out. I think mostimportantly you should just focus on what you look for in a friend. Usually,that’s a good way to tell, yourself, if your friends are treating you right. Whatyou look for in a friend is basically how you expect them to treat you too.Some people like overly kind, polite, and talkative friends. Others likefriends to be more sassy and sarcastic and not extremely polite. For instance,my friends are usually pretty sarcastic, somewhat obnoxious, and a little darkand twisted, and are their own person. We have dark humour as well. It’s reallyall a matter of personalities. Some people are just total opposites of you andyou don’t get along with them. I wouldn’t be able to be friends with someonewho was always serious and couldn’t have fun, or someone who can’t hold anintellectual conversation or any conversations at all. Those kinds of peopletypically annoy me and even if we do somehow become friends, in the end we alwaysend up going our separate ways. But anyway, I guess what I’m trying to say isthat you should set your own boundaries and think about how you know a friendwould care. Some people like friends who always buy stuff for them and pamperand spoil them, others like friends who will be blunt and totally upfront andhonest with you. So, it’s really a matter of how you thinkfriends should treat each other to form your own basis on it. Here I’ll elaborate.
Somethings I look for in a friend:
Sarcastic humor
Able to take jokes
Snark and sass
Dark and twisted (Let’s just say my friends and I can talk different ways to kill someone with an object, and then think up logical ways to get rid of a body and where, and not to leave any evidence behind nor draw too much attention to yourself, and then think about contingencies.)
Intelligent
Can handle name calling (my friend Cathryn and I go back and forth insulting each other all the time, but for humour, not to hurt each other, you’d be surprised at the number of people who don’t understand that at all and make it awkward)
Know how to handle my violent and dark nature (my friends know not to hit me because they know I’ll hit back harder, for instance, out of pure instinct, and they also know how I can make an innocent thing dark af.)
Accepting
Honesty
Loyalty
Someone who has goals, long or short term
Someone who knows what they want and won’t give me the runaround. You can’t be friends part-time with someone. That’s an acquaintance.
A leader, not a follower. Someone who can make their own decisions.
Respectful
Other things I can’t think of right nowUh… Yeah I think I’ve rambled enough. Hope I helped!