Do you feel proud? Does this make you feel strong, to point fingers at children, blame them for the abuse they suffered, tell everyone that it's their fault that they were hurt. That they should have known better, that it's their fault an adult hurt them. Lied to them. Told them things were okay when they weren't. Do you blame an 8-year-old for being raped too? "Oh you should have known better, this is your fault and anyone defending you needs to shut up because this is your fault."
Does it make you feel big and strong to name the accounts of victims of sexual abuse, to incite harassment towards them?
Are you getting off to this? Getting in a good wank? That's the only logical reason I can think of as to what would excuse this kind of behavior.
You can say what you will about me, about my attitude, about the things I've said, the things I've done, the mistakes I've made. I'm human, I'm not perfect, and I will never be perfect. And I'm not going to kill myself trying to be perfect for the likes of you. You who will side with the abuser every single time if it means siding against me.
You don't care about these kids and it shows. You have not lost sleep, you have not had breakdowns because you were trying to figure out how to help, you have not had long nights up comforting them, and you have not experienced the pain of feeling alone in your need to do anything you can to support them and help them heal and help them grow as people. You haven't been up until the early hours of the morning, sobbing to the only other person who knows the extent of the damage because you don't think you're doing enough, even after everything you've already done. Because you don't know who to ask for help in this and you're constantly on the front battle fields taking blows so no one else has to.
You are not the one who will make yourself a martyr for the hatred of people like you so that you can minimize the damage the actual victims of the situation receive. You are too fucking cowardly to show your face, and you mock others for not showing theirs. And you are far far too much a coward who values your own reputation too much to put it on the front lines every single time it is asked of you to prevent further harm being done. You are too much a coward to even defend your own opinion with your actual account, while people who value these children are putting everything they've worked for at risk for them.
You don't care about victims. You don't care about raising awareness of abusers. You just want to fester in your own negativity and try to drag down the people who do care because you dislike them.
Tell me, if I were to donate a million dollars towards resources to help with CSA cases and support victims, would you agree that that is a worthy cause, or would you spew vitriolic hate, call it an attack against your personal self while hiding your identity, and tell people I'm just looking for attention? If I saved animals would I just be doing it for the praises of other people? Must everything revolve around this ideology that if someone does something that is objectively good, like bringing awareness to CSA, or shedding the light of truth on lies and liars, that they must have an underlying reason?
Do you hate me because I am good? Or do you just want an excuse to hate me because you will never be able to stand up and do what I do? Do you hate goodness, or are you envious of my will to constantly push to do what I feel is the right thing? Will you continue to hold past mistakes against me, mistakes I've made up for and have contacted individuals privately to make up for them time and time again, while continuing to tell me that I must forgive being slandered and accused and lied about?
I do not have to forgive anyone for as long as things are being misportrayed and people are trying to demonize me and my actions. When I forgive it is because people have ceased and desisted. Every lie that is spoken about me to try to damage my reputation because I was shedding light on the truth is another nail in the coffin, because this community knows who I am and what I am like. I will never need the validation from swine like you, swine who would rather eat their own shit than admit that someone who is on your side of "against the big blogs" might have a point when it comes to literal child sexual abuse. I do not need your validation because I have a vast support network of people that you seethe and gnash your teeth at because you wish so desperately that you could be in my place.
I am loved because I have made myself worthy of love. I have shed vitriolic hate, I have put aside my own gripes with people, I have kept my personal history and opinions out of this situation to the utmost best of my ability to show the unfiltered truth.
Do you know how distressing it was compiling that document? As someone who is a long term victim of CSA? To see people I love, people I care for, people who I look up to. To read their words, to see the hurt, to try to puzzle things together? Do you understand the horror of being told that your friend, someone you trusted would hurt a child in this manner?
I am upset. I am enraged. I have done so much more for these kids than the likes of you would ever dream of doing unless it was with a gun put to your head. I have done these things out of my own will, my own volition. I have purposefully took on all the attention, I have made it about me by putting it on my main. I have made myself your enemy so that you will not direct your vile vitriol towards the people who were actually hurt. And I will keep standing here, taking these shots, taking these blows, bleeding from my heart and eyes and mouth, screaming until I have no voice and still I will continue to beg and plead because that is the right thing to do. Because that is where my loyalties lie. Because that is the kind of person I am.
What kind of person are you?
