parts of gender
assigned sex: everyone, sadly, is assigned a sex at birth. most people are assigned either female or male, but there is actually a third sex. that is intersex. people who are male assigned at birth are born with penises and people who are female assigned at birth are born with vaginas. a male assigned at birth will also have xy chromosomes and a female assigned at birth will yy chromosomes. if you are intersex, you’ll have sex characteristics from both sexes. sadly, only female and male are on the birth certificates, so usually, the doctor just assigns one of those to the baby, telling the parents to raise their child like that. in the future, that may lead to dysphoria or confusion about themself from the kid.
gender roles: these are the stereotypes and roles society has given females and males. yes, there are more genders, but societal roles haven’t accepted that. either way, gender roles aren’t fair. usually, it’s that females are supposed to be emotional and weak and stupid. males are supposed to be practical and strong and smart. but they have been changing a little now that things are more modern. a lot of kids my age see that girls are smart and practical and maybe still weak and emotional. and boys are supposed to like sports and video games and be bad with grades and are stupid. of course, they aren’t better, because no matter what stereotype we put on someone, whether good or bad, is fair.
gender expression: this is how you express your gender. it’s about what you like to do and your name and your pronouns. it’s different from gender roles, because gender roles are about what society has said is for females and what is supposed to be for males, while gender expression is about the “stereotypes” you put on yourself- they aren’t actually stereotypes, but it’s just the way you express yourself. the way you make yourself look has to do with your expression. for example, if you want short hair or you want to wear makeup, that’s part of your expression. and it can be any combination of things. also, it might have to do with physical body parts. so, for example, you might not want breasts, so you might wear a binder or get top surgery, if you have breasts originally. these are usually described with the terms feminine, androgynous, or masculine. for short, femme, andro, and masc. usually, a femme expression would be long hair and makeup. an andro expression would be neutral clothing and maybe a specific type of hair cut that can be described as both femme and masc. if a girl wears “boy clothes”, they might be considered as andro. a masc person would usually wear loose and longer shorts and have short hair. as i mentioned above, your name and pronouns is a big part of your gender expression. remember, that none of this has to match the expectations of your gender. the same goes for your name and pronouns. if you identify as a boy, but the name sophia feels right, that’s okay. and you can use any pronouns- neo pronouns, she/her pronouns if you are a guy, she/they or he/they pronouns. you should experiment with different pronouns and names before you find one that feels the most right to you.
gender identity: gender identity is what you feel inside about your gender. it has nothing to do with what you like to do or how you dress. i like my hair and i think i will wear makeup in the future, but i still identify as nonbinary, because that’s how i feel inside. i didn’t understand that until i started exploring my feelings. it’s hard to explain. but try to think about who you are. like, what do you see when you picture yourself. do you see a girl or a boy? for me, i don’t really see anything. i just see... me.
(check out my gender unicorn post to learn more about this and explore more about your gender.)