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《☆》 48 hours

part 4 of my LOVE AND ALL event

synopsis. when your best friend tells you that he's moving across the world in two days, you two decide to spend the next 48 hours with each other. pairing. best friend!yoon sanha x reader genre. best friends to lovers, hurt/comfort warnings. sleep deprivation induced love confession, SMOOCHING. MAKING OUT. FULL ON MACKING FACE. mentions of alcohol/getting drunk, sexual innuendos wc. 9.5k (this was not supposed to be this long, i got so carried away)

a/n. YEAH IT'S LATE, I KNOW. NOT THAT ANYONE IS GONNA NOTICE (except for u, zanna) BC NO ONE READS ANY ASTRO FIC

“You’re shitting me right now.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Like, you cannot seriously be dropping this on me right now.”

“I wouldn’t be if I had the option.”

You had your head in your hands as you and your best friend sat on the bit of roof outside your bedroom window. You and Yoon Sanha had been practically attached at the hip since you could walk. Growing up right across the street from each other, going to the same school, spending every day of every summer together, consoling each other through your first heartbreaks, even accidentally being each other's first kiss during a stupid game of spin-the-bottle in middle school.

And now here the two of you were after twenty years of friendship, and he was leaving. For good.

“Why do you have to go with them? It’s not like we’re kids anymore, you can stay if you want to.”

Sanha sighed, wrapping his arm around you to pull you closer. You allowed him to bring you in, resting your head on his shoulder as you fought back the frustrated tears welling up in your eyes.

“I do want to stay. But I have to be with my family. You’d do the same if it was you.”

You sighed into his shoulder. He was right.

“I guess I’m not mad that you decided to go with them, it’s just the fact that you’re telling me two days before you leave.”

“Yeah, I know. I’m a shitty friend.” He sighed, pulling you a little closer, laying his head on top of yours.

“No, you’re my best friend.”

The two of you fell silent. Silence between you two was never awkward, but you didn’t know how to feel right now. Sanha was by far your closest friend- sure, you had other friends, but he was different. You never had to filter yourself around him, never had to hide how you felt or mask all your little quirks. You were yourself around him.

“What do we do now?” You lifted your head off his shoulder, bringing your knees to your chin, watching as the moon began to rise, illuminating the lines of cookie-cutter houses in your neighborhood.

“Well…” Sanha began, stretching his long legs across the roof, leaning back on his elbows. “My plane takes off at eleven p.m. on Sunday, Which leaves us…” He pulled out his phone to check the time, “roughly forty nine hours before I have to be at the airport.” The two of you turned to look at each other at the same time, your faces mirroring each other's expression. Thinking the exact same thing as always.

“So…” He started, a grin creeping up onto his face, “we thinking the same thing?”

You stretched out your legs in front of you, leaning back on your elbows just as he was. “Pulling two consecutive all-nighters, not leaving each other's side until you board a plane to another country, leaving the both of us completely unknowing as to when we’re going to be able to see each other again?”

“That’s the exact thing I had in mind.” He reached his hand out for you to shake, a grin on his face and a twinkle in his eye as you shook it with a sigh. Knowing Sanha, not only were you going to get no sleep, but you were going to end up doing a lot of things you were going to regret.

FRIDAY 21:00

“This is really the last thing you want to do before you leave the country forever?”

“Oh, please. Strap up, babe. We’ve got all night.”

“Gross. And we’ve got two nights, actually.”

You and Sanha were currently walking through a crowded shopping mall, Sanha’s grip tight on your hand as he practically dragged you through the sea of people. Going to a mall on a Friday in the beginning of Summer was never a good idea when you wanted to spend some alone time with your best friend who was leaving you forever.

“Where are we even going? You’re like, basically dragging me like a ragdoll.”

Sanha didn’t answer as he pulled you into a random clothing store, not letting go of your hand as he looked through the racks.

“Sanha? What are we doing?”

“Trying to find some cute hoodies for us so we can match.”

“Why do we need to match?”

Sanha turned around, a faux-offended expression on his face. “You did not just ask me that.” You rolled your eyes and wrenched your hand from his grip, ignoring the grin on his face as you began sorting through the clothing racks yourself.

“Wait…” You could tell he was fighting to hold back a laugh as he spoke. “This is perfect.” Your eyes rolled harder than they ever had before as he pulled out a hoodie with the writing ‘I ❤️ MILFS’ written in bold letters across the chest.

“I hate you.”

“There’s one for you, too!” He giggled as he pulled out a nearly identical hoodie, but with ‘I ❤️ DILFS’ written instead.

“...You’re gonna buy those no matter what I say, aren’t you?”

“You know me so well.” He skipped off towards the register, eagerly pulling out his card and paying for the stupid hoodies. You waited by the door of the store, watching as he flirted with the cashier. Judging by the giggle she made, you could only assume that he’d made a stupid joke. You rolled your eyes as he leaned on the counter, practically towering over the girl at the register. You sometimes hated his stupid jokes and his stupid height and way he was able to get along with everyone. Stupid charming asshole.

He grinned at you as he walked back in your direction, throwing the hoodie at you, which you caught with ease, grimacing at the writing on the front.

“Don’t make that face. You’re gonna be wearing that hoodie for the next forty eight hours, honey.”

“What if I get hot?” The two of you made your way out of the store, the crowd starting to dissipate as the mall was closing soon.

“Then you take your shirt off, and put the hoodie back on. You can shed some layers, but the hoodie stays on.” You made a face at his innuendo, which he paired with that stupid smirk. “And now…” Sanha pulled his hoodie over his head, narrowing his eyes at you until you sighed and did the same. “...Now. We drive.”

SATURDAY 01:00

Sanha had only forty four hours left in the country, forty four hours left with you, and all he’d suggested doing was buying stupid matching hoodies and going back to your place (technically, it was your parents basement that you lived in for free), to eat chicken nuggets. You watched in an almost confused state as Sanha lay sprawled over your couch, bottle of soju and box of chicken nuggets in hand, absently chewing as he watched the shitty rom-com that played quietly on the TV.

He seemed to sense your eyes on him, turning to give you a placid smile before his brows furrowed. He sat up as he noticed the rather disgruntled expression on your face. “What’s wrong, honey?”

“Nothing.” You grumbled, crossing your legs and arms, looking away from him in a deliberately sad manner. You knew you were being childish, but he was your best friend, and he was leaving. Forever. You figured that the two of you would be going out and doing fun and stupid things before he left. You had no idea when you’d see each other again after this, but you were just doing what you usually did; drinking in your parents basement and watching movies.

“Come on, tell me what you’re thinking.” He sat up with a groan, setting the items in his hand on the coffee table and crawling to the other side of the couch to be closer to you. Looking up at you with his big brown eyes, you almost felt bad for being annoyed at him. Yet, you didn’t relent.

“Thought you always know what I’m thinking.”

He frowned up at you, narrowing his eyes as if trying to physically see what was going on inside your head. “I just want to spend time with you.” His eyes softened back up as you relented under his stare. He always was able to get you to talk.

“We are spending time together.” He reached out for your hand, loosely holding your fingers in his own, resting his chin on the arm of the chair.

“Barely.” You sighed, leaning back in your chair, uncrossing your legs. “We’re sitting on opposite sides of the room barely even paying any attention to each other.”

Sanha stayed quiet, but you could see the gears turning in his head. He suddenly sat up, catching you off guard. He kept his hand in yours as he stood up from the couch, urging you to follow him with a light tug of your hand.

“Okay…I love to see you taking initiative, but where are we going?”

“Places!” He started leading you up the stairs to the side door that led into the garage.

“Very descriptive.” He practically shoved you into the passenger seat of his car.

“Trust me, babe. You wanted to go out and do stuff? We’re going out and we’re gonna do stuff.”

You should’ve kept your mouth shut.

SATURDAY 03:00

“We’ve been driving for two hours. Where the hell are we going?”

“You’ll see!” He’d been saying that for the past hour and a half. You were starting to think he was plotting on murdering you. Or he had a body in his trunk and he needed help burying it.

“Okay, can you give me a hint?”

Sanha hummed, tapping his steering wheel on time with the soft music playing over the speakers. “You’ll like it.”

“Great.” You sighed, leaning your head back and closing your eyes. Listening to the soothing sound of Sanha humming along to the music and the vibration of the car as he sped down the highway. You could feel yourself starting to drift off before you felt a sharp pinch on your thigh.

“Ow! What the fuck, Sanha?” You slapped his hand away from your leg, looking up at him in disbelief, yet his face was almost serious, other than the ghost of a smirk that threatened to creep up on his face.

“We agreed to stay awake for these forty eight hours. If you fall asleep, I fall asleep. And given the fact that I’m currently behind the wheel, I don’t think you want that.”

“You’re a psycho.”

“Don’t pretend you don’t like it.” You opened your mouth to refute the claim, but Sanha slowed the car down, turning it down an unlit dirt road. Maybe he really did have a body in the trunk.

“Where are we?”

He shushed you, a smile on his face as he continued down the dirt road. He ignored your confused face, driving for a few more minutes before pulling to the side of the road and putting the car in park. He opened the door without a word and exited the car, quickly jogging around to your side to open your door before you could. You narrowed your eyes up at him as he offered his hand to you, taking it slowly, you let him lead you out of the car.

He led you down the road a ways without a word, the only sounds coming from the occasional crunching of sticks beneath your feet and the crickets chirping in the warm summer night. He occasionally looked back at you with a giddy smile. He was excited, really excited. You had no idea where he was taking you.

“Oh, here we go!” He giggled, pulling you along as he picked up the pace, practically skipping along down the road. He pulled you through a patch of bushes, your confusion growing more prominent the farther into the forest he brought you. Suddenly, he stopped in his tracks, causing you to bump into his back. He turned around to face you, a grin on his face. “You trust me?”

“You have to ask?”

“Right.” He walked around to stand behind you, putting one hand on your shoulder and the other over your eyes, blocking your vision. You took a deep breath as he guided you, taking slow steps so you didn’t trip. “Just a little bit farther.” He breathed into your ear, causing goosebumps to raise all over. You hated when he did that.

“Okay…Here we are.” He removed his hands from your body, and you opened your eyes. Your jaw dropped at the sight in front of you.

When the two of you were kids, every summer your families would take you, Sanha, and his brothers to a big lake a couple hours outside the city. It was a hidden treasure of yours, no one else seemed to know it was there, so you always had it to yourselves. You hadn’t come back to the lake since middle school.

Until now, that is.

You didn’t know what to expect when Sanha had practically thrown you into the car, but you would've never expected this.

“So?” Sanha stood beside you, a proud smile on his face as he waited for your reaction. You looked up at him with a grin before walking towards the edge of the water, taking your shoes off as you approached.

Sanha laughed as you yelped when the cold water touched your feet, but his smile faltered when you started giggling and kicking the water giddily. His brows furrowed as he watched you having fun, a sudden sense of guilt washing over him. But he plastered a smile back onto his face when you turned back to him with that pretty smile, waving him over to come play in the water with you.

“You wanna swim?” He asked as he walked over to you, taking his shoes off and placing them in a safe dry spot a few feet from the shore, gathering yours from where you tossed them and placing them next to his.

Your brows furrowed at his question. “Swim? The water’s super fucking cold.”

“Yeah.” He replied, taking the “I ❤️MILFS” hoodie off and setting it next to his shoes.

“Thought the hoodie was supposed to stay on.” You smirked. He rolled his eyes at you before he began lifting his shirt over his torso. Your jaw snapped shut and you turned your head away from him sharply, looking around and taking in the scenery as nonchalantly as you could.

Sanha snorted at the sight of you pretending the rocks by the shore were the most interesting thing in sight. He waded into the water, doing his best to make it look like he wasn’t freezing his ass off. You looked back over to him, your jaw dropped slightly at the sight of his muscular back, and the fact that he’d removed his jeans as well.

“You gonna join me?” Sanha called over his shoulder, fighting for his life to keep his voice from shaking.

“Uhh…” Your brain short-circuited at his question, standing there dumbly until he turned around with a raised brow.

“You gonna leave me in here by myself, or are you gonna take your clothes off and get in here?”

“Jesus, Sanha.” His words snapped you out of your stupor, the question making you impulsively roll your eyes. He kept staring at you, brow raised and arms crossed. “Jesus. Fine!” You stepped out of the water, walking over to where Sanha had laid his clothes. You took a deep breath, trying to pretend that your best friend was not about to watch you undress. You glanced over at Sanha to see that he’d turned around to give you a modicum of privacy. You couldn’t help but smile as you took the hoodie off, thanking the universe that it was a warm night.

Sanha shivered in the water as he heard you removing your clothes. You’d been his best friend for as long as he could remember, he’d seen you in a bikini a ton of times, you two literally took baths together when you were babies. He’d probably seen you in your underwear several times before! But even as he told himself that, he just couldn’t figure out why his heart felt like it was about to beat out of his chest.

Against his better judgement, he slowly turned his head to look over his shoulder only to be met with the sight of you taking your shirt off over your head. He quickly snapped his head back to its previous place, a red-hot flush creeping up his cheeks. He ran his hands over his face, hoping the cold water of the lake would help cool him down.

He nearly jumped out of his skin when he felt you tap his shoulder. He almost regretted looking down at you. The moon was out in full, illuminating your features as you looked up at him, and you’d pulled your hair back to keep it off your neck. You raised a brow at the blank expression on his face, raising your hand to poke his cheek, causing him to roll his eyes and grab your hand to take it away from his face. But he didn’t let go.

Instead, he pulled you further into the water, laughing at the look on your face as you went deeper into the water, but he’d be lying to himself if he said he wouldn’t turn around and run out of the water right now if you weren’t around to see it.

He brought you deep enough for the water to touch the top of your shoulders, bending his knees so he was on the same level as you. He turned to look at you, only to see you looking up at him with a mischievous grin on your face. His face dropped as soon as he realized what you were thinking.

“Don’t-” He was cut off by you tackling him, pushing him and yourself under the water. The two of you splashed around for a moment before coming back up for air, you laughing at the shell-shocked expression in his face. He watched as you pushed your wet hair out of your face, your laugh lighting up your face in a way that made his heart ache. Your laughter died out as Sanha’s expression remained unchanged, just looking down at you blankly, his wet hair sticking to his forehead. You reached up to brush his hair back, but he grabbed your wrist, stopping you.

You looked up at him in confusion before your face dropped. “Sanha don’t you dare-”, he quickly picked you up and pulled you out of the water, you yelping as he slung you over his shoulder before body slamming you back into the water.

You grinned as you emerged from the water, the sound of Sanha’s sweet laugh filling your ears. The two of you stopped to catch your breath, pushing your hair out of your face, you looked at each other in unison, not saying anything, just looking. The air felt strange as Sanha stared down at you, his eyes going from their usual softness to a certain intensity that you’d never seen before. You weren’t used to the silence between you two feeling so heavy. You impulsively splashed him to cut the tension, causing him to splash you in retaliation.

After several more surprise attacks spaced out by more staring, you two ended up sitting on a rock by the shore, praying the air would dry you off soon, as Sanha’s sudden urge to drive here left no time to grab any towels. The two of you sat in silence, a much more comfortable silence than earlier, looking at the stars as they slowly faded with morning fast approaching. You laid your head on his shoulder, you felt him slightly jump as your cold wet hair met his neck, but he didn’t push you away, instead, laying his head on top of yours. It was comfortable. Familiar. And your heart nearly broke when you remembered that it might be the last time you sit with him like this.

He looked down at your face once he felt a hot tear drop onto his arm along with the cold water from your hair. “Hey, don’t cry now.”

“I’m sorry, I think I realized how much I’m gonna miss this.” You sniffed, wiping the tears from your face.

“No, I mean, don’t cry right now. We’re both in our underwear, it’s kinda weird. Like, I feel like I’ve seen this movie before, and no offense, but that is not how I was planning for this night to go.”

“God, don’t be a fucking gross, Sanha.” You took your head off his shoulder with a quickness, smacking his chest as you pulled away, your tears immediately drying.

“Sorry. You know I love you, right? You’re my…Like, best friend.” He looked down at you nervously, his hands fiddling with a stick he’d found by his feet.

You sighed as your tears welled up again at those simple words. “Yeah…I love you, too, Sanha.”

Sanha prayed you didn’t see the way his lips trembled and his eyes watered, and you didn’t. But you noticed the way his hands shook. You silently took one of his hands in your own, not noticing the way a hot tear made its way down his face as the sun began to rise over the horizon.

SATURDAY 15:00

You sighed for the umpteenth time since you and Sanha made your little pact to not leave each other's side until he left. Your head was starting to hurt from lack of sleep, but you still had around 28 hours left. The two of you were sitting in a diner, you on your fourth and him on his sixth cup of coffee.

“Maybe if you overdose on caffeine, you won’t have to go.” You mused as the waitress filled his mug yet again. Sanha chuckled as he shoved a handful of fries into his mouth.

“Yeah, but then what if you overdose, too? Think that’d be kind of pointless.”

“Okay, but what if our hospital beds were right next to each other?”

“Aww, we could share an IV!” He laughed as he opened a creamer packet, the two of you had built a sizable tower of used sugar and creamer packets. The two of you laughed, but the positive energy didn’t last for long. A somber silence settled over the table as Sanha took a long sip of coffee. You watched with tired eyes as a drip of coffee traveled from the corner of his mouth down to his chin. You had half a mind to reach over and wipe it away before he grabbed a napkin and did it himself.

“This sucks.” You sighed.

“Yeah…We need to go do something fun.”

“Like what?” You massaged your temples, willing your headache to go away.

“I don’t know! It’s Summer! It’s a Saturday afternoon! We’re young! We’re hot! You…look like you’re about to die.” Sanha watched as you planted your face in your hands, groaning loudly. A couple in the booth across the wall from you looked over in silent judgement at your matching hoodies. “That was me, sorry! Got a bit of a tummy ache.” Sanha laughed, patting his stomach. The couple turned away, whispering to each other. Sanha sighed and gently rubbed your head, shushing you as you groaned again.

“You remember that time in middle school when I drank five RedBulls at 6 a.m. after pulling an all-nighter to study for my final, and then I proceeded to fail that final, and then I had a migraine for like, three days straight?” You lifted your head up, keeping your eyes closed, blindly reaching for your coffee.

“Didn’t that happen in high school?” Sanha moved your coffee into your hand so you didn’t knock it off the table.

“Yeah, it happened a couple times.”

Sanha watched with a frown as you chugged down your coffee like a beer. “You know what? I have an idea.”

You lifted your head up to look at him with narrowed eyes, placing your mug back down on the table. “You gonna tell me what it is this time?”

“Nope! Let’s go!” He turned to call the waitress over for the check while you groaned and placed your head back down on the table.

SATURDAY 18:00

You were in the passenger seat of Sanha’s car yet again, but you knew he was driving you to the coast. Something about this moment was so peaceful, Sanha had rolled down the windows enough for the wind to blow through your hair, Mac Miller playing through the speakers, the sun beaming down on the ocean, Sanha holding the steering wheel in one hand, the other holding yours, his thumb lightly stroking the back of it. The sunglasses on his face settled low on the bridge of his nose, a content smile on his face.

“You wanna walk around the shops before we head down to the beach?” He asked as he pulled into the little town that resided just off the beach, his hand letting go of yours and back to the steering wheel. You hummed and nodded, looking at all the cute kitschy shops that lined the town’s mainstreet.

Sanha parked outside of a candy shop and the two of you immediately headed inside without any discussion. The two of you spent almost two hours taste testing all the different saltwater taffy flavors, arguing on what flavors to actually buy. You ended up leaving with a plastic bag weighing almost two pounds, filled to brim with the stuff.

After you were done browsing through the cute little souvenir shops, you dropped your stuff off in his car and headed down to the beach. For a Saturday evening, it was surprisingly sparse. There were a couple of families scattered along the beach, but for the most part, the two of you were alone, and the sun was starting to set beautifully in the west.

The two of you took off your shoes as you had done the previous night, setting them carefully down by a big stick. You looked at each other at the same time, sharing the same look. Without a word, the two of you raced down to the water, giggling as you ran through the sand. Of course, Sanha with his long legs got there first, he turned around just in time to catch you as you came barreling into him. He wrapped his arms around you, lifting you out of the water and walking deeper into the ocean, the waves coming to his knees.

“If you drop me, I’m gonna fucking kill you!” You giggled as Sanha continued into the water, the waves now coming up to your ankles as they wrapped around Sanha’s waist.

“I’m not gonna drop you.” He laughed, holding you a little tighter as you slipped in his grasp a little. “I just want to stay like this for a minute.”

Your laughter died out after that comment. You breathed heavily, attempting to catch your breath after chasing your friend down the coast. You nestled your face into his neck, taking a deep breath in through your nose. You wondered if this would be the last time you’d smell his cologne. It was vanilla and sandalwood. You’d bought the scent for him for his birthday a few years ago, and he’d worn it ever since. His hand rubbed the small of your back, not in an inherently intimate way, it was just comforting. For both of you. You always loved to be held, and he always loved to have something to hold.

SATURDAY 21:00

You had officially spent the past twenty four hours with your best friend. The two of you were sat next to each other, a small fire in front of you, keeping you somewhat warm in the cold coastal air. As Sanha set up the fire, you reminisced about the time the two of you went to your first high school party, and he’d accidentally set your hair on fire. He put it out immediately by splashing his full cup of beer at your face, completely ruining your brand-new shirt in the process. At the time, you were so pissed at him, you swore you’d never speak to him again. But the next morning, he showed up at your door with one of his hoodies that you’d been begging to borrow for months.

The two of you watched the ocean in the darkness, stretching out for what looked like infinity, the moon casting a beautiful silver light down on it. Sanha turned to look at you and he frowned at the puzzled expression on your face.

“What are you thinking about?” He whispered with a little nudge to your shoulder. You didn’t answer, only bringing your knees up to your chest, resting your chin on them with a deep sigh. He looked away with a similar sigh. “Stupid question. Sorry.”

“It’s like…” He quickly looked back down as you started. “It’s like this is affecting me way more than it’s affecting you somehow.”

Sanha stayed silent, attempting to wrap his arm around you, but you pushed it back down. You did your best to ignore the hurt in his eyes as you scooted away from him a bit.

“You know it hurts me, too.”

You scoffed, running your hands through your hair in frustration. “I know. And I know you don’t like talking about your feelings. But you’ve hardly said anything about like, feeling bad, or that you’re gonna miss hanging out or that you’re gonna miss…me.” You said the last word in an almost silent whisper.

“I am gonna miss you.” His voice broke as he spoke up, prompting you to look up at him, shocked as you saw the tears escaping his eyes. “I’m gonna miss you more than anything. Literally anything. You’ve been there for me my whole life, you’re my best friend, you’re the only person I can really talk to. I just feel like…if I don’t acknowledge that I’ll miss you while I’m still here…then maybe I won’t feel it until I actually am gone.”

He refused to look down at you as he cried, wiping his tears as quickly as they fell. You silently scooted back to your spot right next to him, resting your head on his shoulder. You could tell by the way his shoulder slightly shook that he was trying, and failing, to hold in his sobs. You could feel yourself tearing up as you wrapped your arms around him, which he immediately reciprocated. Pulling you close as he could, one arm around your waist, the other holding your head to his chest.

The two of you cried in each other's arms until there were no more tears left to cry. At some point, Sanha had shifted onto his back, bringing you down with him. You lay here now, with his arms around you and your head on his chest, slowly moving up and down with his deep breaths. Taking your phone out of your pocket, you saw the numbers 01:00 glaring up at up. You shifted your head up to look up at Sanha, thinking he might have fallen asleep, only to find him already looking down at you. You hated seeing your friend cry, but there was something so pretty about the tear stains on his cheeks illuminated by the fire that was still softly burning in the sand.

“I love you.” He softly muttered, soft enough for you to wonder if you were meant to hear it. You gave him a small smile before settling your head back on his chest. His hand that rested on your shoulder went up to the back of your head, gently stroking your hair. There was something so intimate about this moment. The sudden thought that this would be the perfect honeymoon popped into your mind, causing you to blush and sigh, embarrassed at your own thoughts.

“When do you want to head back home?” Sanha asked quietly, his hand still stroking your hair.

You hummed into his chest, taking a deep inhale of his scent. “I don’t.”

“Me neither.” He agreed.

“Can we just stay like this for a little bit?” You whispered, almost hoping he didn’t hear it.

But he responded with a whispered, “Yeah.”

SUNDAY 07:00

You woke with a start, realizing that you failed the mission. 48 hour all-nighter failed. You lifted your head to look at your surroundings, the fire had long since smouldered out. Turning to look at Sanha, you were shocked to see him already looking up at you, smiling softly up at you through tired eyes.

“Oh, shit.” You groaned, rubbing your eyes. “I’m so sorry, Sanha. I didn’t mean to fall asleep.”

He sat up slowly, groaning as he stretched out his arms, stretching the side that you had been laying on a little bit extra. “Don’t worry about it.” He smiled. “It was only for a couple hours. I’m sure I nodded off at some point as well.”

“Will you be okay?” You asked softly, pulling at a string from one of the holes in his jeans.

He smiled down at you as you fiddled with his jeans, reaching out his hand to gently shake the sand from your hair. “I’ll be fine.” He breathed out, his breath catching in his chest as you looked up at him with your pretty eyes, shining in sympathy.

“If you say so. But we should probably head back now.”

He stood up with another tired groan, helping you up from the sand and dusting it from the back of your hoodie, turning around so you could do the same for him.

The two of you silently made your way back to Sanha’s car. Without a word, you held out your hand for him to toss his keys in your direction. The two of you wordlessly agreeing that the one who had actually gotten a little bit of sleep should be the one to drive.

The four-hour drive back to your house was mostly silent, Sanha occasionally nodding in and out of sleep, harshly pinching his own arm to keep him from falling asleep. Each time he did, you sighed and shook your head at him, but you knew better than to actually tell him off. If he wanted to stay awake until he boarded that plane, then he would find a way to stay awake until he boarded that plane.

You pulled up to your house as slowly as you could as to not alert your parents of your arrival. Sanha was practically zombie-ish as the two of you descended the stairs into your pseudo-apartment in your parents house. You watched almost in pity as Sanha made a notably slow beeline to your fridge, grabbing a RedBull from the door and immediately chugging the whole thing.

“You know Sanha…” He made his way over to your couch and flopped down onto it, grabbing the remote from the coffee table and turning the TV on. “...It’s okay if you want to take a nap for a couple hours.”

He immediately shook his head in protest, wincing at the headache the sudden movement wave him. You sighed and gently sat next to him, wrapping your arm around him. He immediately melted into you, snuggling his head into your shoulder. You ran your fingers through your hair soothingly the way he had done to you the night before. He took a deep breath, closing his eyes at the comforting sensation. “Sanha, just go to sleep. I’ll wake you up in a couple hours.”

“No.” He immediately protested, pulling away and looking back at you as if you’d viscerally offended him. “I’m not going to sleep.”

“Dude…” You started with a sigh, but he cut your sentence off with a shake of his head.

“I’m not going to sleep. Just…stop trying.”

“I slept for a few hours! You said it wasn’t a big deal!”

“And it wasn’t! Because it was you!”

“What do you mean? I’m so confused right now.”

“I don’t want to go to sleep. I don’t want to spend any more time away from you than I already have to.” You shook your head in confusion, trying to process exactly what he was saying.

“What…?”

He sighed, putting his face in his hands, rubbing his tired eyes. “If I go to sleep, then I’ll just be missing out on the few hours I have left with you…My plane leaves in twelve hours. I can’t…I can’t lose any more time.”

“Sanha…You’re not losing any time with me by taking a nap for a few hours.”

He looked back up at you, tears present in his eyes again. “I’m sorry.”

Your heart cracked at the way his voice broke. His big beautiful eyes were glossy as he looked at you. “Sanha, just go lay down on my bed for a couple hours.” You ran your fingers through his soft hair again, his eyes fluttering closed at the touch.

“...Will you come with me?”

Your breath hitched at the question, but you nodded nevertheless. “...Of course.”

You stood up from your spot on the couch, gently taking his hands in yours and leading him to your bedroom. You pulled the blankets back so he could settle in as you pulled the blackout curtains over your windows, casting the room in darkness. You were about to walk out of the room before Sanha’s voice stopped you in your tracks.

“Thought you said you were gonna come with me?”

Your cheeks heated up as he spoke, hoping he couldn’t see in the darkness, you turned around to look at your friend, who was sitting up on his elbows. Even in the darkness, you could see his pretty round eyes looking up at you pleadingly.

“I thought you meant just like…tuck you in or whatever.”

Sanha shook his head, pushing the blankets on the other side of the bed back, looking back at you expectantly. “Like I said, if you sleep, I sleep. That works the other way around, too.”

The heat in your cheeks only deepened as you nodded in defeat, closing the bedroom door and making your way to your side of the bed, settling in, laying flat on your back, putting a respectful amount of distance between you and your friend.

Sanha sighed looking over at you staring at the ceiling like a mummy. “Don’t be weird, dummy. Come here.” He gently grabbed your arm, urging you to roll over, pulling you close so you were chest-to-chest. “Sorry if I get sand in your bed.” He whispered with a smile.

“Don’t worry about it.” You mumbled into his chest, wrapping your arms around his waist, settling into him. Sanha sighed contentedly as he felt you relax. He loved knowing that you could feel relaxed around him. And that he could feel so relaxed around you.

SUNDAY 18:00

“Shit.” You sighed as you saw the time on your digital clock when you woke up. You almost rolled over to get out of bed, but you were stopped when you became conscious of the firm arms wrapped around your waist. You must have rolled over at some point in your sleep, as Sanha was now pressed against your back, his hands warm on your stomach, his chest rising and falling as he breathed deeply. You turned to look at him and your heart started beating hard in your chest as you looked at his face in his sleep.

He seemed so peaceful. He didn’t have that little wrinkle between his brows that appeared when he was stressed, his thick lips were parted slightly as he breathed, you could feel the warm air on your neck, tickling your skin.

But you knew you had to wake him.

You gently shook him, “Sanha?” you brushed the hair off his forehead gently, your fingers straying to his jawline as you did so. “Sanha, wake up.” He let out a deep groan, causing your stomach to flutter. You were about to remove your hand from his face before he reached up and grabbed it, holding it there, taking another deep breath. You held your own breath as he moved the palm of your hand down to his mouth, planting a gentle kiss there before releasing it. Your breath came out shaky as he slowly opened his eyes, smiling softly up at you.

“Hey, you.” He breathed out, the smile on his face dropping slightly as he looked at the time on the clock behind you.

“I know.” You sighed, tossing the blankets up and standing up, stretching your sore limbs before you walked over to the curtains and opened them, letting the evening sun into the room. Your heart ached as you turned around to see Sanha looking up at you, a sad smile on his face as he watched you. “We should get up.”

Sanha nodded, rubbing his eyes as he sat up in your bed. You watched with a frown as he stood up slowly with a groan, his hair somehow still perfect despite the sleep. The two of you slowly ‘got ready’ for the rest of the day, showering and changing your clothes, washing away the remnants of your night on the beach.

You walked into your makeshift living room after getting ready to find Sanha sitting on the couch, staring out the window in a rather melancholy manner as the sun had started to set, the golden light casting over his face, illuminating his features in a way you’d never seen before.

He must have heard you exit your room. Without even turning to look at you, he asked “Wanna go for a walk?”

SUNDAY 19:30

You had to leave for the airport in an hour and a half. It still didn’t feel real. You were thankful that Sanha’s family had taken the liberty to pack his things as the two of you hung out for the weekend, grateful that you still had this time together.

The path the two of you walked was familiar, you’d walked it together countless times. You didn’t even have to ask where you were going. The path to the neighborhood playground had deteriorated over the years, there wasn’t many kids left in the neighborhood, they’d all grown up and moved away. Like Sanha.

The two of you walked hand in hand toward the park in silence. It wasn’t a comfortable silence. Both of you scared that if you turned to look at each other, tears would be shed. As you got nearer to the park, your ears perked up as you heard a jingle in the distance. It sounded familiar. You looked up to Sanha to see if he was thinking the same, but his face had already broken out into a nostalgic smile. He looked down at you, a little glimmer in his eye. “Want some ice cream?”

The two of you were sat on the broken-down merry-go-round, ice cream in hand, neither of you speaking as you ate. The sky had settled into a warm twilight, the stars barely starting to shine through the dull dark blue. You watched as Sanha ate his ice cream, suddenly flashing back to when the two of you were little kids on Summer vacation, begging your parents for ice cream money, giggling as you ate the sweet treats.

“You still look tired.” Sanha raised his eyebrows in agreement with your statement, biting into his ice cream in a way that made your teeth hurt just to watch.

“Yeah, well, seven hours of sleep to my forty plus hours of being awake didn’t really do much for me.” You nodded at his words, finished off your ice cream and shoving the wrapper into your pocket, sighing deeply as you leaned against the pole in the middle of the merry-go-round.

Sanha finished his ice cream not long after you, shoving his wrapper into his pocket the same way you did. He didn’t lean against the pole like you did, though. He sat up and stared at you, an indecipherable look in his eyes as you met them. You raised your brows at him as if to ask him what he was thinking, but he just kept staring.

Your brows furrowed as he breathed out a deep sigh, looking away from you to rub his eyes with a groan. “I…don’t think…I can do this.”

You tilted your head in confusion, his eyes looking back up to meet yours. There was something notably…longing about his expression. He took a quick deep breath, shifting his body to fully face yours, he folded his hands in front of himself as if he were praying. He was close enough for you to see the deep purple bags under his eyes.

He said your name gently, your head tilted again, your eyes pleading for him to continue. “I don’t really know how long I’ve felt like this…maybe forever…and I’m sorry to be telling you this right now- but it might be my last chance…” He trailed off slightly as his voice broke, your heart dropping to your stomach as you realized what he was trying to say.

“I uh…I feel like a piece of shit for telling you now. But…” He took one final deep breath, his glossy eyes practically pleading with yours to let him continue. “I am so in love with you.”

Your jaw dropped at his words. It was like the whole world went silent at his confession, the birds no longer tweeting, the frogs no longer croaking, the crickets no longer chirping. It was just you and Sanha.

“I’m sorry for only telling you now. Feels like I’ve been telling you all the important stuff at the worst times possible lately.”

Your eyes never left each other, his pleading, yours confused.

“You…are in love with me?”

“Yeah.”

“Always have been?”

“Yeah.”

“And if I told you I felt the same?”

“...I’d say that’s some pretty shitty timing. Not that I can judge on that front.” You chuckled through teary eyes at that, your head in your hands as you tried to figure out whether you were about to break down in laughter or sobs.

“How long have you felt the same?”

You hummed, looking back up at him, but quickly looking away at his intense stare. “I don’t know, Sanha. Forever, I guess.”

“Well…Guess we should’ve had this conversation a lot sooner.”

You both laughed sadly, just looking at each other. You scooted closer to Sanha to rest your head on his shoulder as you usually did. It didn’t feel different this time- the warmth you felt when he wrapped his arms around you- which confused you for a moment, but then you realized that that warmth that filled you whenever he held you wasn’t just a deep platonic love for your friend. It was love. Real love.

The minutes ticked down without end. His lips on the top of your head as you both breathed deeply. He hummed as he toyed with the string of your hoodie, just enjoying being able to breathe you in. You were messing with the fingers on his hand that was resting on his thigh, his long fingers were always a kind of fascination of yours.

“Sanha?”

Your heart drummed loudly in your ears as he hummed, looking down at you. You tried to mentally center yourself before you looked back up at him. His heart pounding just the same as his eyes met yours. “Yeah?”

“...Will you kiss me?”

“...Yeah.”

As if he had been waiting his whole life for that question, he brought his hand to your jaw, tilting your head up for him to plant his lips on yours. His swiftness took your breath away, but your body practically reacted on its own, your lips moving against his, your hand coming to the back of his head as if you’d done this dozens of times before.

You were no stranger to the feeling of Sanha’s hands on your body, as he brought his hand to the small of your back to pull you against him, you smoothly brought your legs to either side of hips as if it was second nature. His hand moved from your jaw to the back of your head, his fingers tangling in your hair, the slight sting of the tugging on your scalp caused you to gasp slightly, Sanha taking it as an opportunity to deepen the kiss, pulling your hair just a little bit more to tilt your head, making it a little bit easier for him to slip his tongue into your mouth.

You did your best to keep yourself grounded, wanting to enjoy this for as long as you could. You kept your eyes closed, focusing on the sensation of Sanha’s fingers scratching your scalp, his tongue massaging against yours, his hand tightly gripping your back as if you were going to run away.

His plump lips moved to your cheek and down to your jawline, placing light feathery kisses all the way down to your neck. “Sanha…” You whispered, your stomach twisting as he held you tighter. He breathed out your name in return as you ran your fingers through his hair. You ran your hands down to his chest, pushing him back slightly. He looked up at you with furrowed brows and pleading eyes as he stared up at you. You brought your hands up to either side of his face, your heart melting as he instinctively leaned into your touch, his hands coming down to gently hold your hips.

You leaned back in to press a gentle kiss to his lips, pulling back for a moment to take in the sight of his blown out pupils again before leaning back in, gently nipping at his bottom lip, causing him to hold your hips a little bit tighter. You slowly moved your lips against his, whimpering softly as you felt his arms fully wrap around you, holding you as close as you could possibly be.

You pulled back again, grinning as Sanha chased your lips for more, pouting as you held his face still. The two of you stared at each other for a moment, taking in each other's disheveled appearance. He ran his fingers through your hair again, not to pull it, just to touch it. Your thumbs gently brushed over his cheekbones, just holding his face. Your eye contact didn’t waver until Sanha’s phone started ringing, startling the both of you, causing Sanha’s finger to tug at a knot in your hair, making you yelp in pain, he apologized quickly, pressing a quick peck to your lips before answering his phone.

“Yeah? Okay…We’ll be there soon.” He sighed, leaning his head against the pole behind him, his hand still on your hip squeezing gently as if to ground himself. He looked down and took a deep breath before looking back up at you with apologetic eyes. “I guess we were out here for a little longer than anticipated. My parents are on their way to the airport right now. They wanted to know if you could drive me there.”

Your heart dropped as if it was your first time hearing the news of his moving. You nodded quickly, your hands on his chest trembling as you stood from your spot in his lap, your face burning red as the weight of what the two of you just did settled on you. You helped Sanha stand from his place underneath you. A strange air settled over the two of you. “Well…Let’s go, I guess.” He stepped off the merry-go-round, holding out his hand for you to take. You walked slowly as you could back to his car, he opened the passenger door for you to slide into the seat, and he settled into the driver's side.

SUNDAY 21:00

The drive to the airport was almost completely silent, Sanha’s hand gently rested on your thigh as he drove, you making a pitiful attempt to keep your tears at bay as you got closer and closer to your destination.

It was like you were in a dream-like state as you and Sanha pulled up to the airport and made your way inside, catching up to his family, and getting his luggage checked. You didn’t notice the worried looks his parents and brothers kept shooting your way as you moved through the airport. You didn’t want to believe it as the Yoon family made it to security, pausing to bid you goodbye.

His parents hugged you tightly, his father shedding tears as they let you go, wishing you well, reminding you that you needed to drop Sanha’s car off at his cousin’s house, and telling you that you’re welcome to visit whenever you wanted. His brothers had significantly less sincere words to say, but they hugged you tightly nevertheless, telling you that they’d miss you, and that you were “like the little sister they never had, or whatever.”

His family all shared knowing looks with each other as they went in the security line, giving you and Sanha some semblance of privacy to bid each other goodbye. The two of you just looked at each other for a moment before crashing into each other in unison, your arms wrapping around his neck, his around your waist.

“I kinda wish that we’d done more than just make out the last hour we had together.” He joked through the tears, holding you as close as he could without hurting you.

“I don’t mind. I probably would have if you were a bad kisser.” He rolled his eyes, but you couldn’t see it. You breathed in his cologne one more time, savoring the scent, pressing your nose into his neck.

“I love you.” He breathed into your ear, causing goosebumps to raise all over. You loved when he did that.

“I love you, too.” Your voice cracked, squeezing him tightly one last time before you both pulled away, holding each other's hands, looking into each other’s eyes, the same sadness mirrored in your expressions. You didn’t want to pull away.

But you had to.

Sanha leaned in, pressing one last soft kiss to your lips. It wasn’t just a kiss. It was a goodbye. Because you both knew you couldn’t say the words.

“I’ll call you the second I land.”

“You better.”

“I’ll FaceTime you every day.”

“Not if I call you first. You better keep that hoodie on the whole flight, by the way.”

Sanha chuckled, looking down at the big I❤️MILFS printed across his chest. “I’ll keep mine on as long as you keep yours on.”

“I think this thing is practically fused to my body at this point.”

The two of you shared one last laugh before sighing, not wanting to look in each other's eyes again.

“I love you. So much. I just wanted to say it again.” Sanha brushed his fingers over your knuckles before bringing them up and pressing his lips to them.

“I love you, too, Sanha. Don’t forget that.”

His eyes finally met yours again, and he gave you one last smile. “I could never.”

He held your hands until the last possible second, walking into the security line alongside the sea of people traveling to wherever the universe was taking them. You watched Sanha until he made it all the way through security, laughing every time he turned and waved to you, your heart sinking into your stomach as he gave you one last wave before disappearing behind the gate.

You managed to fight your tears until you made your way back to Sanha’s car. The tears fell slowly at first, you thought they might dissipate until your whole body started racking with sobs, leaning your head against the steering wheel as you cried out your grief. You ran your hands through your hair, the intensity of your sobs nearly doubled as you felt the knots he had left in your hair as he pulled on it. You could feel the bruises forming on your neck from the way Sanha’s mouth worked on you. Your hips slightly sore from how tightly he’d held them.

The only consolation you had was the knowledge that Sanha was your best friend. He always had been and he always would be. No amount of distance or time apart could ever change that. You loved him, and you knew he loved you. And that had to be enough for now.

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