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"That yellow wallpaper is probably riddled with Arsenic." (to The Banker from The Bartlebey)
This panicked The Banker. How could he know? Was Bartlebey as all knowing as everyone said? Was The Banker even supposed to know Bartlebey's lore? He had to stop panicking. He could get past this.
"What makes you say that?" the Banker asked, as cool as a cucumber, or in this case, cool as an Asparagus.
“Are you meeting someone here? Because.. I think I’m that person.” (Bartlebey, Star of Christmas verse)
"You're.... the fella they sent me to meet?" Charlie questioned quizzically. He was technically supposed to be doing community service, but if this guy was going to do something else, he certainly wasn't opposed to it.
❛ i want to be your dad . ❜ (from any of my muses)
“Oh, uh, Bartlebey, is it?” Megan spoke slowly and carefully, “I’m flattered but am uninterested in a ‘daddy’ right now.”
What do we think about everyone shacking up, bestie?
Oh, so many friends to talk about! Let’s see…
Bob and Megan? Well they’ve been on and off longer than some of these fans have been alive. But throwing a child in the equation might be the glue that adheres them permanently- unless Megan wants Francois to be a child of divorce.
Larry and Petunia really seemed like the “it” couple back when they finally got together. But now with this A drama and a certain papprazzo pepper…things could start shaking up. We’ve already seen Petunia get jealous of Acmetha, and that was in the past. Is Larry a jealous type too? Personally, I can’t wait to find out.
Charlie Pincher and Bartlebey…one of those things that I’m not even sure I want to know. They seemed happy, secure, until, of course, the butler found out the invisible hand Charlie played in the disappearance of Mom Asparagus. But now that moms been found alive and blogging - will all be forgiven? I’m not sure if their relationship is on a strong enough foundation to withstand that.
And speaking of Mom Asparagus - Dad must be thrilled, but a certain famous bowler might be driven to the edge. Who’s to say Mom won’t be murdered for real this time?
Oh, and murdering spouses - did you see Archibald and Lovey talking civilly? Pretty weird given that she’s still sure she burried him.
And we can’t forget everyone’s favorite green girls - why IS Esther acting so shy around Achmetha? They’ve already confessed to having kissed, and I have a feeling their little two girl slumber parties don’t stop with just kissing.
We’ve also had a few newer faces to keep an eye on. The banker seems to have been getting pretty friendly with a certain red headed rhubarb, and I don’t mean the rug. I don’t know them as well as I know the others, but know that I’m watching with baited breath just like you.
XOXO
Gossip Gourd 😘
I’m watching Clue with subs rn while listening to some music and honestly like
I would LOVE to do a whole Clue VT AU because Bartlebey is literally just Lovecraftian Horror!Wadsworth. But I need to know who I’m casting as who… 🤔 any suggestions?
I def wanna stick a handful of the OCs in here though because genuinely I think they’d be the funniest choices.
There’s def gonna be some art coming soon anyway.))
(EDIT: not a Bartlebey per se, but enjoy a Wadsworth. It’s what Bartlebey would look like if perceived as human anyway lol)
Is there a chance Bartlebey is actually your real father?
"Oh, yeah. Sure. I mean, ya got the family resemblance. Me, a talkin' weed, him, a talkin' butler. Your point was?" She gave an amused half-smile, giving a roll of her eyes behind the sunglasses. "Yeah, no, Nonny-baby, I was a divine accident. I was a potted plant with no consciousness, electrocuted by a phone wire carryin' gossip. Only way that butler could possibly be my father is if he adopted me. Or, if he happened to be the lady gossipin' on the phone, and I'll be real with ya, I'm pretty sure he wasn't around Bumblyburg when I was born. Thanks for the laugh, anon, but I am an original. I owe my creation to an unlikely miracle and mutation, not to any sort of parents. Honor thy mother and Bartlebey? Not this weed. Honor thyself, if ya get what I mean."
“everything i’ve done.. every horrible atrocity, it’s been for you. ❜ (from uh… Bartlebey. The butler.)
"Mr. The Butler... surely ya ain't mean that,"
@coisblue @bartlebey
While Megan was nervous about this whole three people meeting at once thing, since that didn't happen a lot around here, it was specifically the other two people that she was nervous about. As we all have recently learned, Francois and Bartlebey had never properly been introduced. So as they all sat around, it was of course Megan who spoke first, as I, Chewie, decided. "Francois," she began slowly, "Say bonjour to Bartlebey. He is your new grandfather."
