#based on events

[deadudephotos]

I cast upon you my “need to poop really bad while sitting in a place non optimal to leave your 400 level course without walking directly in front of the instructor” spell.

You will sit there and suffer as the shit brews in your bowels for the next 17 and a half minutes.

[hipcapybara]

Autism gf who needs you to know all the minor details before telling a story as to avoid confusion 🤝 ADHD bf who launches directly into the middle of a story with zero context

[inseparableduo]

“In this world, you either suck dick or get your dick sucked!”

[naturestarstruck]

X and Zero: *walking through a steep trail*

Signas: *jokingly in the distance* I see two Sasquatches

Axl: *looks* those two aren't Bigfoot, that's X and Zero

Alternate response:

Axl: *looks* those two aren't Bigfoot, that's my parents!

[dirtytdpconfessions]

[inseparableduo]

Andrew: This shirt is fucking gay

Lina: Andrew…. you’re gay.

Andrew: …..

Andrew: You have a point there

Andrew: I’m still not wearing this gay ass shirt though

[machinesecret]

screaming "you are a psionic warrior sent from venus to torment me and end my life" at a guy while desperate to suck him off