#beyoncescock

[ellenayla]

If witching hour is 3AM, does that mean it hops time zones?

[ellenayla]

I just remembered in high school I was curling my friends hair during break.

Burned my hand, yelped, jumped up and twisted my ankle when I landed.

[lunawantsmurder]

Superman is wild, like

Marvel created multiple different heroes, each with believable specific weaknesses and strengths, and DC went like

Yeah well my hero has super strength and anti-everything armor!

What do you mean that‘s unfair? Ugh fine, there‘s a very rare space metal that only appears on his faraway home planet which makes him lose his powers i guess.

[mothguns]

Saw some sakura trees todays…should probably tell em…

[lunawantsmurder]

Alcohol is fun imo because it can either cause you to teasingly talk shit about someone else at a party in hopes they will beat you up, which will cause them to eventually fall in love with you (100% true fact), or be literal concentrated liquid depressant™ when you‘re alone at home and coming down from a workday while talking to your mates on Discord.

[lunawantsmurder]

Waking up on a workday is like:

-have showered

-have put on clean work clothes

-have fifteen minutes left to eat breakfast

-decide to search for a baseball cap because i looked in the mirror (god forbid) and suddenly don‘t like the way my hair looks today

-go to work hungry

[lunawantsmurder]

I too would be screaming if ~flesh orb~ was in my vicinity.

[lunawantsmurder]

Today is just an eating incredibly crumbly biscuits in bed kind of day