I LOVE Frankfurt, don’t get me wrong, this city causes butterflies in my tummy on a regular basis, but I dislike it as well. I dislike it for so many reasons. I dislike it for one major reason: For the way I’ve felt here and the way I’m feeling at the moment. I just graduaded from Highschool and I’m trying to take a year off, balance my way through the world, learn, travel and just explore my interests. Everything went pretty good so far, but recently , I don’t know if it’s the OCD/Depression that’s coming back, but I just feel not safe. Like not safe in my mind, very unsatisfied. Like what are those thoughts in my mind. Also its this feeling of feeling sick. I’m just so sick of the lack of representation. I’m so sick of not finding someone to identify with. Like wtf dude. I mean I’m used to feeling pretty different from the rest of the people, in my head I’ve always felt like there were worlds between me and other people. Like I’d always be too much. Way too much. What the fuck is happening. So many thoughts. But I don’t want to feel like an alien, because I’m fucking not. I’m not a fucking alien. Why are there no black girls talking about mental illnesses and weird thoughts in their head? Because they’re busy dealing with racism. Like wtf. I can never be just fucking me, whatever I do, I know that it shapes the way people perceive black people. I know I’m black, but if you think about it, my actions should in the same way affect people’s perception of youngsters, girls and I don’t know, people who wear glasses or people who have black hair. I’m black the same way other people have red hair, blue eyes, are gay or have a disability. It’s no big deal if you fucking educate yourself about it and think about that person’s role in society. Like be a fucking ally. Just be educated enough to defend my human rights in any situation. Because surpriiiiiiiise my heart beats the same way yours does and I’m also about that 3 L shit, like live, love and laugh. Oh Berlin, I fucking love you and I’ve found the right words why. Not only do you offer fucking great food, but you also are so fucking political. I love how every fifth wall or shit is inviting you to have a dialogue about something that matters, because people express themselves. That might appear scary or I don’t give a shit, but in the end its pretty awesome if you think about it.
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