Name: Blooey
Debut: Paper Mario: The Thousand Year Door
Wow. So this is it? This is that show that kids and adults alike have fallen in love with? The show that's getting an entire section in the Animal Kingdom at Disney World? I can't say I expected the show to end up being a golden-brown squid who appears in one game. But it's nice to know that so many people can interpret such profound meaning out of this fellow!
Blooey is one of Luigi's Partners That Hate Him For His Bumbling Antics. Luigi's lack of dexterity led him to throw Blooey into lava, but don't worry! This is fictional lava, so it's just a minor inconvenience! Blooey probably just bounced up with a flaming butt (?) crying "wahahahahaha". And he is now a crisp golden brown. Even his eyeballs! Me-ouch! (that would be a good joke if he was a cat)
I wouldn't eat him, and I apologize to him if that's insulting. I just don't want to eat squid! His Japanese name brings "cookie" to mind, and I do love to eat "cookie". Could Blooey be like a mythical gingerbread man, a living cookie with an attitude all its own? Hell no he can't! He's a squid who fell into lava. We just went over that!
Blooey rather resembles Dried Blooper from Bowser's Inside Story, which is probably a coincidence, but it's nifty that two different RPG spinoffs have featured Crispy Bloopers, both in their most acclaimed installments! I know people love Super Mario RPG, but just imagine how much they would love it if there was a Crispy Blooper. Imagine if Geno was replaced with Dried Blooper. Mario's party members just show up and disappear when needed for cutscenes, but if one of these party members was Dried Blooper, then Mario could carry him around neatly in a folder. New and untold levels of immersion. Just consider it. Thank you.
