Two best friends Fall for each other, but they’re both scared to love one another. Written in two different ‘timelines’
FIRST DRAFT
He wanders through the crowd, his gaze flitting back and forth. When he bumps into people, he isn’t able to mumble a simple apology, being too preoccupied with his thoughts. Auto pilot brings him to his locker, but he can’t focus enough to manage any concentration, let alone enough to open it until Rose slams the locker next to him. He looks at her in a strange and detached way, until he recognizes her face.
“Oh, Rose!” James exclaims, “Sorry, I’m just kind of.. Nervous, I guess.” He shifts in his too small shoes. He’d just had another growth spurt, and he hadn't had time to buy new ones. He thought to himself that he should soon, these made him even clumsier than usual. He was staring at his shoes, staring at the shoes of the people around him. He sees Claires shoes, and looks up at her. But his view is blocked by Roses hands waving in the air all around where he stands.
“James,” she shouts, “Pay attention!” He apologizes once again, turning back to his locker. He scans the crowd once more, searching for Claire for the millionth time today. James shakes his head, and turns back to his locker. How long does it take to open a damn locker, he thinks to himself. Rose watches James with a concerned face, and stands there for a few minutes, making sure he’s going to be okay.
Claire walks up to her locker, hugging her books to her chest. James was nervous, and he always tells her when something's wrong. After all, they had been ‘James and Claire’ since the beginning of time. She looks across the hallway at James and Rose standing there, talking. Claire heaves a sigh, wishing she and James could ever be more than friends. But she knew that it would always be less, never even approaching more. She opens her locker, and her hair, long and frizzy, falls across her face, and she flicks it away.
The inside of the locker is filled with pictures of James and Claire, and in the back where no one can see, hearts are drawn with the two of them in the center. Her locker is a mess, and the bottom of it has hair ties strewn all over it. A mess of bobby pins lay there, and a hairbrush is among the mess. Her hair is important to her, to say the least. But she couldn’t care right now. James had a problem, meaning she did too. She put her books in the locker, making sure to grab James writing notebook. He always forgot it places. She chuckles to herself, trying to put her stress to the side. She flips her fiery hair over her shoulder.
The flip of Claire's hair catches Roses attention, and she walks over.
“Hey, what's up with James?” She asks, looking Claire up and down. Her hair is a disheveled mane around her face, and dark circles casts shadows under her eyes. Her shoes are untied, and she looks like she might pass out from exhaustion.
“On second thought, what's up with you?” Claire shakes her head, unable to answer the question. James walks over, and Claire simply looks up at him, tears shining in her eyes. He looks at her wrinkled, stained clothes, her messy mop of hair and her tearing eyes. As he takes in all these things that other people would regard as flaws, he falls even more in love with her. Not able to wait another moment, he takes both of her wrists in his hands and kisses her. She kisses back, but pulls away. Tears are streaming down her face.
“James, I love you.”
“I love-” Claire interrupts him.
“No, you don't…. No. James I… God this sounds so cliché. I want to to be more to you than just your best friend James, but we’re in tenth grade. Things change, people change. But do you remember what happened when I dated Ben? Or steven? Any boyfriend I’ve ever had has gotten nothing but heartbreak from me. I’m scared James. I don’t think I’ve changed. Some people, just don’t change. And I don’t want to hurt you.”
She walks away, her messy hair swaying, salty tears leaving rivets in her face. She wants to go back, she wants to love him. But she won’t; But she can’t. James eyes shimmer in the lights of the school as he walks over to the book she dropped. His writing notebook. She really is everything to me. Was.
James’ Writing Notebook
Ending of A Lion's Mane
I watch as she walks away, her hair swinging, swaying in the breeze flowing through the windows. That girl has been everything to me for the longest time. I think of how this could have gone differently, and I feel happy that it happened this way. I know that she would be happy not being with me. I imagine if she said something like “I’m scared for you,” and I shiver. She deserves to be happy, she doesn't deserve to end up waiting until she isn’t scared. I hear the door bang behind her, and I start to smile. I laugh, actually. My face stings, and rejection hurts like hell, but I laugh nonetheless. Rose gives me a strange look, but I only start laughing harder. It was always Claire who told me to do what I’m scared of. I’m actually pretty sure her motto is always do what you’re afraid to do.
I pick up my old notebook, and inside of it lays every single thing I’ve ever written. All music. I flip through the pages, and I see riffs written out, lyrics, chords, and everything in between scribbled everywhere. In the margins there are scribbled out hearts that once held our names together. I turn to the last page, and I see the last love song I would ever write about her. The title was everything. I grab a pencil from my pocket and scratch out all the times I wrote she really is everything to me. I’m frantically scribbling out the is, changing it to was. Was is such a final word, but is anything really final?
I tell myself that she was still my best friend the whole time, but it feels so hard to believe. I remember all the late night texts, so confused about everything that was happening. I laughs at all the conversations about fate, about what was meant to happen. I would look back on every single time we talked about soul mates so differently. I thought she liked me like I liked her, but I guess I had just imagined it. All the times she had leaned in ever so slightly, bit her lips, playfully punched me. Everything I’ve ever thought about her… I guess I just didn’t really know who she was. I- Buzz
I got a text. I got a text? I look down. It's Claire. I see her running through the doors of the school, escaping the downpour that looked like it had just started. I looked down and read her text. It says, “It's been too long. I miss you.” She bangs the doors back open, and time seems to slow down as she nears me. I see her mane of hair, and suddenly I know that I love her. I love her, I really do, and I always will. I’m suddenly sure of it.
I close my notebook, and slowly approach her. I stuff it in my bag, not sure if this is all real or not. She reaches for my hand, and all of sudden this feels very real. Our hands intertwine, and we walk out the door into the rain. I guess if anything is meant to be, It’ll happen.
He looks at the page where it dropped. He wrote a story about fate, and how we already knew what were supposed to do with our lives. He runs out the door, tripping over every single step on the way down. He catches up with claire.
“I don’t care. I would miss you too much to not be with you.” James searches Claire's face, waiting for emotion. She smiles.
“I knew you’d come.” His heart beats faster as she reaches for his hand. Maybe it was fate. But maybe, it never even happened at all.
Prepárate que esta #RUMBA está que empieza. Acércate a #Libar que con #BlueMango es hasta que amanezca. Pregúntame @quehacerenpanama @quehaypahoy_panama @amopanama @panama_night_life_507 (en Libar Panama)
