May 7, 2022
me, on a date: you said you’re a geek?
my date: yeah because I watch all the marvel movies, love them, and you have to watch them in order or else-
me, shoving breadsticks into my purse: I just remembered i have to go immediately
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me, on a date: you said you’re a geek?
my date: yeah because I watch all the marvel movies, love them, and you have to watch them in order or else-
me, shoving breadsticks into my purse: I just remembered i have to go immediately
Mono: (With a bag of crusty, stale marshmallows)
The Thin Man: “I̡͘ T͟h̀̀̕ơ҉ú̷ģ̵̵h̶͝t̡҉̀ Y̷̨ó͘͘u̷͜ Di̵̷d́ ͝͏͟N҉͟o̴t ̢L̕i̢k͘e͟͠ Ş͞w̵͘ee̷ti̴̕e̵͏ś̕͘?҉"҉ “
Mono: “S’not. Som’ting see TV.”
The Thin Man: “ Y̛ou͢҉ S͠a͢҉w̵̷͘ So͜me͜͝t̶͡h̡̧i͝n̶͟g̵̸.̵͟.̶̨.̢҉ ̧͞O̶͘͝n̛ ̵̡́T̷̢h̡̢̧ȩ̕ ͞T͞e̶ļ̷e̡v͏̡͝i͜ş̶̴io̸͝ń̵?͠ ”
Mono: “Mm-hmm. Then f’r eat. Good?”
The Thin Man: “ O͢͢h̀͠ N̕o̷̡-̴̨N͡͠ơ̴-̡̕͠N̡o. ҉̸͝I ͢Ą͢͢m̨͘ ҉̴N̛͡ot̢́ E̸͘͘a̵͞t҉̴̀i͞n̴g͟ ͘͜͝Ţ̀͡h̡̕at̢͜͠.”
Mono: (stuffing his pockets with crusty, stale marshmallows)
“Have go.”
Big LONG Pause
The Thin Man: “ A̷n̶d͜͝ ́N̢̕͝ơw͏̛͜.̸.̀.̶ ̶҉W̨h͢at̨͠ H͏á͠p̢p̢͡e̡͝nś̢?̡҉͞ ”
Mono: “Story go no.”
The Thin Man: “ An̸d͜ W͢h́a͘t͞҉́ ̀Ò͞͞f͝ ͠͞T̷h͘o̴͟͠s̶͢e̶̷͞ ́Ş̛͠w͝eeţ͟s?͠ “
Mono: (shrugs and wanders off)
The Thin Man: (glitchy confusion)
ˡᶦˢᵗᵉⁿ ᵗᵒ ᵐᵉ ᵗʰᶦˢ ᶦˢ ᵃ ˢᵐᵒˡ ᶜʰᶦˡᵈ ᵃⁿᵈ ʰᵉ ʷᶦˡˡ ᶦᵐᶦᵗᵃᵗᵉ ᴱ ⱽ ᴱ ᴿ ʸ ᵀ ᴴ ᴵ ᴺ ᴳ
Me on a date: So what kind of memes do you like?
Date: Mostly the new ones. Anything else gets old after a while, you know? I feel old memes can’t be revived.
Me, shoving breadsticks into my purse: I have to go.
you‘ve heard of packing get ready for [shoves breadsticks into pants]
[At a party]
Me: so, tell me about yourself.
Them: you know that Netflix show about the depressed horse, Bojack Horseman?
Me: yeah?
Them: I connect spiritually to the horse.
Me: [already gone; have taken the breadsticks from the kitchen for the sake of the old joke]
Me on a date: so how do you feel about getting a vaccine?
Them: honestly, it’s pointless and all a hoax-I stopped wearing a mask and tell people I’m vaxxed so I don’t have to wear it
Shoving breadsticks into my purse frantically putting on mask: actually I have to go home immediately, I just remembered I have COVID and must quarantine.
me hanging out w my friend: this is nice
friend: im glad you agreed to go on a date w me
me, shoving breadsticks into my purse: DATE?
Gen, stuffing breadsticks into his bag: I have to go