Entry 1. 8-21-19
the way you make me feel today is unimportant and forgotten. ive expressed certain feelings towards you and you dont even say anything to them. i told myself that id be forgetting you now and not expect a text or even want one from you. you said no more sleeping over and no more seeing or talking to each other often. by=ut then you stayed over the other night and slept with me. i know those dont mean anything but why go back on what you say if youre just gonna keep coming back? why tell you that if you leace, not to come back unless its to work together. i know once i back off, stop checking on you, stop caring, stop loving you, you'll text me, you'll ask to stay over. you say you no longer desire to be around me until im not around, and then its ok to be arounf you until i do something that bugs you like getting upset when you dont wanna spend time with me or when youll do anything but date me. i know this should of started the minute you left me but things take time. i know now that ill be backing off a bit, but i know i wont be my happy same self and maybe , if you leave me alone long enough for me to foget you, maybe you'll come back , and by that time i really hope it isnt too late, beacause i love you so much, but if youre gonna make me wait until im exactly how you want me to be, i might find someone who loves me for all of me and not just the pick and choose parts. - Sam.