Takari Week 2022: [Day 1 prompt: Focus & Reflection]
Focus and Reflection were official character songs released outside of the main series. Focus was Takeru’s feature song on the Best Partner CD, and Reflection was Hikari’s song on the Digimon Girl’s Festival CD. It’s been widely speculated that Focus is Takeru’s song for Hikari, and vice versa for Reflection. For the Day 1 prompt, I thought I would imagine a scenario where Takeru and Hikari’s songs on the Adventure 02 Kizuna Character CD were dedicated to one another the same way Focus/Reflection is suspected to be. Turns out, it wasn’t at all difficult to do!
For reference, here is Takeru’s Kizuna song (Step High Step) and here is Hikari’s Kizuna song (Tomorrow’s Blue), which are inspirations for my Takari Day 1 fic.
Title: Tomorrow’s Blue Character: Hikari Yagami & Takeru Takaishi Pairings: Takari (for @takariweek) Word Count: 4410 Rating: G Summary: Hikari and Takeru discuss the uncertainties of their impending future, and the mysteries that will be ushered in by tomorrow.
Cross-posted on AO3
Read below the cut 👇🏻
Tomorrow’s Blue
Before Hikari stretched an endless sea of green. The green of innocence, as Hikari recognized it as, illuminated by the soft yellow light of the waning moon. This was the land where stories began, and coincidentally, where stories also ended. A beginning and an ending tied together by the thin thread of fate, and Hikari was sure that somehow, she was interwoven into it, her fate embroidered into the intricacies of this land.
At the present moment, she occupied the interstices between a beginning and an end, directionless and clueless, staring into the daunting abyss of tomorrow. But tonight, tonight she will pretend to be eight again, learning to explore the land around her, listening to the secrets this universe had to tell her. Tonight, she will forget her troubles and silence the funeral march in her mind as it mourned the seconds that passed while she sat static on this field of green.
“Lost in thoughts again?”
Instinctively, a smile dappled on the curve of Hikari’s lips. She turned her head slightly, enough to find a tall but familiar silhouette hugging the edges of her vision. Barely two seconds later, a pair of blue eyes stared back at her, accompanied by a scintillating, albeit roguish, grin.
“More or less,” she responded with a nonchalant shrug as her companion took a seat next to her on the lush green field.
“Oof,” he sang out, his tone a mixture of surprise and amusement as his body ricocheted off the bouncy field.
Hikari couldn’t help but giggle, which earned her an exaggerated pout from her friend. The force of the bounce was a little stronger than anticipated. Not surprising, given the extra weight their adult body now carried, as opposed to their tinier frames back when they first set sight on this rolling fields of green.
“Thanks for coming to meet me here, Takeru,” she acknowledged softly, but not so soft that Takeru couldn’t hear.
Takeru flashed a grin, “I don’t mind, only because you now owe me lunch.”
Hikari stuck out her tongue in response. They lapsed into contemplative silence then, admiring the large building block monuments in the distance and the peculiar trees surrounding them bearing toys as fruits amongst its leaves. Hikari remembered once asking Takeru if he knew what the building blocks were made of, if they were hard and rocky like the mountains they resembled.
“No, it’s all just feathers,” Takeru had said matter-of-factly, to which Hikari had vehemently argued against, until Takeru conceded and admitted defeat.
Off in the distance, they heard a distinct crack, like delicate glass crumbling into fairy dust, a signal that another new life was born into the Digital World. Hikari closed her eyes and imagined a Nyaromon opening its innocent eyes for the first time. One day, it might grow into a regal Angewomon, or perhaps it was looking forward to flying into the digital sky as a majestic Nefertimon. It filled her to the brim with a strange sense of restlessness, knowing that the future potential was endless, yet uncertain. It was enough to make her shiver.
“You okay?”
Hikari turned towards the question and found herself staring once again into Takeru’s blue eyes, its depths endless. Her cheeks heated up, and she turned away quickly, hoping the night would be kind enough to hide her secrets.
“Yes, of course. Why wouldn’t I be?”
“I don’t know, I just thought I saw you shiver, I was worried you might be cold”
In response, she feigned an eye roll, exaggerating the movement so it’s noticeable to Takeru. But inward, her stomach tightened. She felt sweat condensing on her palms, and quickly pressed them against the grass to wipe them away. Even now, on the cusp of adulthood, her favourite feeling remains the one that bloomed inside her from the time she was young, and nestled within her until this very moment. It was the feeling of knowing that Takeru cared, enough to watch over her and pick up a detail as subtle as a shiver
“I’m fine, Takeru,” she breathed out, “You know, you don’t have to worry about me all the time. I can take care of myself”
Takeru chuckled, “I know, I know. But…old habits die hard, you know?”
Hikari nodded in agreement, embracing this moment and basking in the familiarity and the warmth, the kindness that can only be found in Takeru’s voice. After all, she didn’t know how many more of these carefree moments they had left. The future was coming, tomorrow was uncertain, and dwelling on these thoughts now brought back to mind the two letters stuffed in her backpack, clipped between the pages of her blank new journal.
She shivered again, drawing Takeru’s immediate attention.
“Are you sure you’re not cold, Hikari?”
She looked away, back towards the checkered green fields and sighed.
“Takeru, have you ever thought about the future?”
Without looking, she could tell his blue eyes were lit in amusement at her sudden question. She wouldn’t be surprised if she could trace the distinct slope of his smile with her eyes closed.
“What do you mean?” he countered
“You know, the future, like what will happen, what we are going to do, who we are going see, where we’ll end up in the future”
“Hmm…let’s see…well tomorrow I am meeting up with Yamato for dinner, so I see a lot of spicy curry in my future”
She turned sharply in her seat and shoved him hard, just as Takeru burst into a rowdy guffaw. His long legs flailed out in a tangled heap as he fell sideways, his arms hugged his side as he continued roaring out his laugh.
“That’s not what I meant. Takeru, I’m serious.”
“What? You asked me if I ever thought about the future, and technically, tomorrow is the future”
Hikari stood up, arms grabbing her bag as she turned away, “Fine, if you don’t want to talk with me like a serious adult then we don’t have to be here. I’m going home”
“Wait, Hikari,” Takeru cried out in a frantic voice. His arms shot out and encircled her slender wrist, and with an easy jerk, he pulled her back down beside him. It was her body’s turn to ricochet off the bouncy green field, and although she donned on her most convincing scowl, inside, she felt satisfied that Takeru pulled her back. It was enough for her to believe that Takeru would always pull her back.
“Tomorrow is the future, Hikari. It means a new start, new adventures. Everything can change by the light of a new sunrise.”
She turned to him, to his dazzling blue eyes. Under the pale moonlight of the Digital World, it looked brilliantly bright, dancing a masterful choreography in Hikari’s eyes.
“A new start?” she repeated.
“Yes. Every time anyone mentions the future, they’re always referencing some…unattainable timeframe from now. They’re thinking about a year, or two, or five, maybe decades ahead. But I have always wondered, why can’t we talk about tomorrow? Tomorrow, I can start writing that book I always wanted to write. Tomorrow, Daisuke can submit an application to the culinary school he wants to go to in New York City. Tomorrow, Ken can finally stop dragging his feet and ask Miyako out on a real date. So many things can happen tomorrow, and thinking about tomorrow makes me feel like our goals are attainable. We don’t have to wait years to begin our future. It can all start tomorrow because tomorrow is ours.”
Hikari shuddered. Tomorrow. Tomorrow is deadline and confessions and uncertainty. Tomorrow is an adventure she still could not face. She tilted her face up towards the azure sky, watching as the stars above her twinkled against the darkened universe.
Tomorrow is blue, just like the night sky before them, mysterious and foreboding, snuffling out all traces of light.
“It’s almost like people are afraid,” Takeru continued, “They prefer to think of the future as this faraway place to delay the unknown for as long as they can. But it’s not like the future will wait for anyone. Things are changing, they keep changing, so why not face the changes and embrace the unknown of tomorrow? So tell me, Hikari, what do you want to do tomorrow?”
Then, it came. The tears gathered in her eyes. She bit her lips and rubbed at them, hoping Takeru would believe they were mere specks of dust, and not the daunting mysteries of uncertainty, of mediating between expectations and desires.
Behind closed eyes, she felt familiar touches lingering on her cheeks, and opened them to find Takeru wiping away residual tears with the pad of his thumb. She gulped and turned away, hugging her knees tighter to her chest.
“We’ve been through a lot together, haven’t we?” she whispered.
“Well…we’ve saved the world together a few times, but no big deal”
The tears gave way to an easy smile. In her mind were all the memories they shared together, all the fights, all the battles, all the times they ran together until they were breathless and fried. In her spirit were all the competing emotions threatening to spill, all the feelings she had no words for, no vehicles fit enough to carry them to Takeru. So instead, she squeezed her eyes shut and settled for another topic…
“You might be wondering why I asked you to come here tonight,” she began.
Takeru nodded, but kept silent, waiting for her to continue.
“I need your opinion on something, Takeru”
“Really? My opinion? But what about Miyako or Taichi?”
“Taichi cannot know…yet, not until I have my final decision, and I know what Miyako will say, and it won’t help me because I know it’ll only be what she would do if she were me. But…I want to talk to someone who knows me inside and out, because then they’ll help me figure out not only what I should do, but what I need to do…for myself”
His fingers twitched, the movement so delicate it was barely detectable. But she caught it all the same, no subtle details from Takeru could escape her attentive eyes.
“I received a letter last month…”
“Oh”
“Well…two letters”
“Oh…”
The second oh was heavy with confusion. An understandable reaction. Hikari reached for her bag, tucked neatly underneath one of the toy-bearing trees. With purposeful movements, she retrieved the brand new journal she brought last week, its pages still bare and crisp. Wedged between its pages were two letters, each with equally worn edges, a product of her pouring over the sentences night after night, memorizing each word and punctuation mark imprinted upon heavy stock paper.
“This was the first letter I received,” Hikari began, opening up the page, smoothing over the creases before running her fingers over the official emblem at the top.
Takeru quickly scanned the first sentence over Hikari’s shoulders, his eyes widening with understanding as he read.
“An acceptance letter!”
“Yes,” Hikari acknowledged with a nod, “To the early childhood education program at the women’s college in Shinjuku”
“It’s what you spoke about for awhile now”
She nodded again in response.
“And…the other letter?”
She produced the second piece of paper, still folded into perfect thirds and handed it to Takeru with shaking fingers. He accepted it from her, his touch on her fingers dappled a little longer than expected before he let go to devote his attention to the letter.
Hikari rubbed at the spot his touch had lingered on her skin, smoothing it slowly to distract herself from imagining Takeru reading the second letter, to will her imagination away from his eyes taking in the same words she’s read over millions and millions of times as she laid awake at night alone in her room.
The silence was deafening, lasting longer than she expected. Takeru was a fast reader, his eyes vacuuming up words at a rate that dismayed her. So this pause was worrisome, enough for her to cast quick glances at him. He had his eyes down, a divot between his brows as he rubbed at his chin thoughtfully. Finally, after what felt like an eternity and an hour, he looked up at her with the most complicated expression she’s ever seen.
“Hikari, I’m…I’m surprised, shocked…”
Without thinking, she leaned forward, her body drifting close enough to smell the faint smell of aftershave clinging to his body. For a brief second, her heart quickened. Takeru wears aftershave now. What a strange…yet enticing concept.
“...and impressed. You never told me you applied to Hokkaido University! And for veterinary medicine. This is…this is amazing, and…and you’ve been accepted!”
“I…I…I honestly never thought I would be accepted,” Hikari admitted in a meek voice, “I mean…I didn’t think my math and science grades were anywhere enough for the program. You have no idea how shocked I was when I received the acceptance letter”
Takeru sighed and shook his head slowly, pursing his lips as he carefully folded up the letter back into its equal segments.
“Hikari, you don’t give yourself enough credit. I wish…I wish you could see…”
His voice trailed off. Hikari watched him curiously as he combed his fingers through his golden hair, scattering specks of moonlight in all directions as he sighed again.
“But Hikari…if you didn’t think you would be accepted, then…why did you apply?”
Hikari offered a nonchalant shrug, but inside, her heart was hammering so hard, she thought her response would be drowned out by its beat.
“Isn’t that…isn’t that what we all have to do?” she managed to respond.
Takeru’s brow furrowed in confusion, “What do you mean?”
“Taichi did it. Miyako did it. They all moved away from home for university. That’s how you find yourself and become the adult you’re supposed to be, isn’t it?”
“But, Hikari, this is Hokkaido, and Hokkaido is…is….”
“Far,” Hikari offered.
For a brief moment, Hikari thought she saw the dull flicker of a grim frown on Takeru’s features, but it quickly evaporated away, making way for a cheerful smile. His cheerful smile.
“Yeah, it is…far, but is it what you want, Hikari? Because if it is what you want, I will support you, we will all support you.”
“Umm…I…” she bit her lips and looked away. It was the question she asked herself for weeks now, but she was no closer to an answer than when she first received the acceptance letters.
“Does anyone else know about this?”
“Miyako knows I applied to the school in Hokkaido, and has been asking me for updates every week since. But I couldn’t bring myself to tell her”
“Why not?”
She sighed, “I just knew if I told her, she would want me to leave for Hokkaido. But…”
“But…?”
“But…”
She heaved a heavy sigh and tilted her head up at the sky once more, studying the dark blue preceding tomorrow’s unknown, hoping to find the words to her explanation there.
But in the end, she had to find her own words within herself.
“I applied to Hokkaido University the same night Miyako submitted her application to that exchange program in Spain. I thought…I thought maybe for once, I could do something like that, too. So...I guess you could say...I applied because I wanted to be like Miyako, to be wild and adventurous and unpredictable, to run with my hair caught in the wind and not have to worry about the tangles that come after.”
“Wow, that’s good,” Takeru remarked with a laugh, “I should remember this for my next writing assignment. But…tell me the truth, Hikari.”
He leaned close, then pressed one of the letters into her open palm. Hikari looked down and saw the logo of Hokkaido University plastered on the front, Takeru’s index finger inches away from its crest.
“It must come from somewhere right? There’s a part of you that must want this…to venture far away from home, to pursue this career path. It’s not just the need to be unpredictable like Miyako…”
“Well…” she began, before her breath hitched in her throat. By now, Takeru was so close, she could see her own reflection imprinted in his blue eyes. They were a mesmerizing shade. For years and years now, she struggled to find a word to describe the hue, no crayon or paint colour could capture the blue emblazoned on Takeru’s orbs.
Takeru blue. She decided that’s how she would name the colour. Takeru blue.
And surprisingly, she saw a small smile on her lips as she gazed into her reflection in Takeru’s eyes. It somehow put her at ease, to recognize her own kind of smile imprinted in the blue of Takeru’s orbs, to recognize her true self erected amidst the boundless land of Takeru blue.
Tomorrow’s blue.
It gave her the courage she needed to shatter the wall she hid behind, to offer up her truth.
“The truth is…I don’t know.”
Takeru looked taken aback. But before he could respond, Hikari spoke again.
“At the beginning, I thought it was what I wanted, but now, I’m not so sure anymore. I feel so…pathetic. I can’t figure out what I want to do and separate it from what I need to do. I wish I was more like Taichi, or Miyako…they’re so sure of themselves, they always know what to do.”
“Hikari…”
“It was my fault. I put myself in this situation, all on an impulse.”
The last word barely left Hikari’s lips, when suddenly, Takeru shot up beside her. She looked up at his form, a quizzical expression on her face before he bent and offered his hand.
“Come on,” he beckoned.
Without questioning, she accepted his hand, and together, they walked through the wide open space of Primary Village, carefully shifting their weight so as not to bounce too high on the springy floor as they walked.
“Where are you taking me?” she questioned.
But Takeru did not respond, he only led her deeper into the village until at long last, they stopped before a cliff. Hikari peered down at the edge, a rolling field of green before her, the brand new Digimon eggs resembled specks of dust from where she stood, and the brown of the earthen crib almost impossible to make out from her height. She gulped, inching away from the cliff ever so slightly while Takeru stepped forward.
“Jump with me?” he asked.
“What? Why?” she squeaked.
“No good reasons, but it’ll be fun”
Hikari blanched. She wanted to shake her head, but at the same time, she didn’t want Takeru to know she was afraid. So she etched forward with him, measuring the distance of the jump with wary eyes.
“But only if you want to, Hikari” came Takeru’s sturdy response.
But Hikari shook her head, placing a foot forward, shifting the weight onto her back leg as she prepared for the jump.
“I have to,” she asserted.
“Why?”
“Because…because I have to”
“Do you?”
“Yes, yes, I have to. You don’t understand, Takeru. I have to prove to everyone that I can do this…I have to prove to myself that I’m capable of being on my own, that I’m not…that I’m not some pathetic, scared, little girl that refuses to grow up”
“But Hikari, you’re not any of those things”
“Yes, yes I am,” without warning, the tears spilled. Her legs collapsed under her, and she found herself falling to the ground with her face buried in her palm. Her body bounced slightly on the springy floor as she struggled to stifle her sobs. She felt the weight shift on the floor beside her, then Takeru’s arms around her shoulders as she allowed her tears to fall unabated.
How long she cried, she did not know. She only knew Takeru’s warmth was with her the entire time, his hands holding her close as her tears soaked the whites of his school uniform.
“Miyako said once that she refused to stay in Tokyo because she didn’t want to be boring, that she wanted to spread her wings and fly away from her nest. She even talked about moving away from Japan. She said she wanted to make her own mistakes and learn from them, she said she can’t grow into the woman she’s supposed to be if she’s tethered to her family, so that’s why she’s leaving for Spain.”
“That’s…a little dramatic for a year abroad. But…I can’t say I’m surprised. It is Miyako after all.”
“Precisely. It is Miyako, we’re not surprised that Miyako is brave enough to do this. But I can’t help but feel like…that should be my journey, too. All my life, I’ve always wanted to stay close to home, to be near my mom and dad, to be close to comfort. But maybe that’s a sign of immaturity, Takeru. Maybe I have to push myself out of my comfort zone, like jumping off this cliff”
She attempted to stand, but didn’t get very far before Takeru pulled her down once again. Their bodies ricocheted together once it hit the bouncy floor.
“Hikari…wait, it’s not that I don’t think you can do this, on the contrary, I think you have everything within yourself to live on your own in Hokkaido and excel at this vet program, just like I know you can jump off this cliff and land on your feet without anyone’s help, but…but…”
“But what?”
“But…I don’t want you to do this because you feel like you have to do this.”
“Isn’t that why we do anything in life? We saved the Digital World because we had to do it. We fought all those battles because it was our duty. Life is about obligation, Takeru”
“No, it doesn’t have to be about obligation if. It’s our future, Hikari. I’d like to think that we have some control over what we want out of our lives. We don’t have to prove anything to anyone. Tomorrow is ours to make of it as we wish, we can decide on what it can and should be for ourselves. This is your decision, Hikari. So ask yourself, if you could do whatever you’d like, without worrying about what others think, what would you do?”
“I…I don’t know”
“Hikari…” he wiped Hikari’s face gently, in the area right underneath her eyes. She remained still, revelling in the steadiness of his hands, at the warmth of his breath as he caught her tears.
“What if I make the wrong decision, Takeru?”
“No matter what you decide, Hikari, if it’s a decision you have made for yourself, then it will be the right decision. I know you can overcome whatever trouble comes your way. You’ve done it countless times before, and I know you can do it again.”
“But what if…what if it is the wrong decision? What if I stay in Tokyo and regret not taking the chance? On the other hand, what if I leave home and hate Hokkaido? ”
“Then you can change your path the next day,” Takeru responded with a soft laugh, “There’s always tomorrow to bring something different our way”
“Is it really that easy?”
“No, no it isn’t. But I know you can do it. You are capable of so much, Hikari. I’ve been in awe of you since we were eight, since we started running through these fields together. We’ve always fought together, stayed together, been together, and through it all, I’ve never been short of amazed at all that you can accomplish”
Hikari let slip a delicate smile. She gazed at him once again, at the blue of his eyes dancing in the moonlight, wishing to be as close to him as possible so she could see her smiles reflected in his stares again.
“Will you think less of me if I decide to stay in Tokyo and do the predictable thing?”
“It doesn’t matter what I think, Hikari. You don’t have to be anyone but yourself, so do what’s best for you.”
Then, underneath the light of his smile, everything clicked. And for the first time in a long time, she had the courage to accept the truth.
“I’m going to stay,” she decided.
“Really?”
“Yes, I want to stay. Teaching has been my dream forever, and I want to stay in Tokyo. My friends and family are here in Tokyo. I don’t have to leave far away at this moment just because Miyako is doing it. I want to be myself, so I’m going to do this to stay true to myself.”
Takeru beamed, the light hitting him at a spectacular angle, buzzing around Hikari at an excitable speed.
“Sometimes, accepting what’s right for us is the bravest thing we can do,” Takeru assured her.
“Even if it doesn’t seem so brave to others”
Takeru nodded in agreement, and with that flick of his head and the charm of his smiles, Hikari was possessed with an overwhelming urge to pull him close, as close as possible until she could smell and taste more than the aftershave lingering on his skin. But then, a gale of wind blasted through, lifting her hair and blouse, breaking her eye contact with him as the force knocked both of them forward a few millimetres.
They both laughed, and before either of them could recover, she had her hands around his wrists, and she was the one pulling them forward.
“Jump with me?” she asked.
His trademark smirk came back, the one that set her spirit wild and her heart ablaze. He pulled her close, until their arms were linked and their waist were pressed up against each other. The wind picked up again, pushing them forward as if the Digital World wanted this for the both of them.
“Thought you’d never ask,” he responded.
She took a deep breath before she jumped, but there was no fear, no apprehension as they leapt. After all, she could see her smile reflected in his blue eyes, and it was enough for her to understand that he would watch over her…no, that they would watch over each other as they took to the air with the world of possibility beneath their feet.
It was how she knew, that whatever tomorrow brings, everything was going to be fine.