#captain's journals

[dadj]

📔 the day neon j gave 1010 the AI that let them learn and grow

XXXX, 10 10

Dear brother, Today marks the day where we see if my efforts were worth it...

I've installed the AI into the new androids I've created... The same AI I've been toiling on for the last... Gods how long has it been? How long have I hidden away in my workshop? I don't remember, though I suppose you would...

Whatever the case may be, it doesn't matter now. The board has been set and now the pieces are put into motion. 

To see them functioning, moving around, talking... Asking questions! It is exciting! Exhilarating! To see their unique and very different reactions to me giving them their names.. I really think this might work!

Am I crazy for doing this? Maybe. Perhaps I am crazy... A crazy broken old man with far too much time on his hands...

I hope you don't mind that I've named one after you... I'm sure you can guess which one...

Well I suppose I should get some sleep... It's been a long day. Till tomorrow...

I miss you.

[mcytbdamofficial]

i’ve got my priorities straight

[dadj]

📔 getting used to having a screen for a head

XXXX, Winter

Dear brother,

Looks like I've survived my latest procedure. Or maybe not? Maybe I’m in limbo? I can't tell... Everything feels... Dream-like right now.

I'll soon be released from the hospital. Hopefully, back home... I'll sleep better. Though finding sleep has always been hard after these surgeries. You're probably wondering why I do this to myself. It's just.. convenient t this point. I don't care anymore. The real me died in that war anyways. Who cares what I do to my body now?

It's so strange looking into a mirror now... To see a screen stare back.. well stare... If a screen can stare. I'm not sure what to display on it as a default setting. Perhaps a radar? that would be visually interesting wouldn't it?

I keep trying to adjust my eyepatch or bring water to my face to drink... That just results in a smudged screen and a wave of embarrassment... 'specially when the nurses are there to witness my stupidities...

You'd laugh too, I'm sure. Or perhaps you would have talked me out of it all together?

No matter what happens to my body and whatever shape it may take.. I'm still Jay.

I'm still your brother.

I miss you.

[dadj]

📔 j realizing that he is like a father to the boys

XXXX, Summer

Dear brother,

I... I don't really know how to start this topic... or even how to write it out.

Eloni... Earlier today.. He.. We were talking and he called me dad. He panicked quickly after thinking he did something wrong and that he would be deactivated for this. I reassured him that it was okay. That it was fine...

I asked him if he really thought of me as a father figure and then asked the other boys if they felt the same. Seems they all feel this way. I was shocked, but it also.. felt warm? I felt humbled. To think that they would actually come to think of me as their dad...

Perhaps that's my own fault. I can't just view them as androids... They aren't a simulation of life.. They are alive to me! I care for them and worry about them everyday. I want to watch them grow and help them become better versions of themselves. I guess I was acting too fatherly towards them...

Oh well.. I don't care! I embrace it! I told the boys they were free to call me dad as long as they were home and with no guests in the house.

... 

You're laughing about this aren't you? Well laugh all you want.

You'd be an uncle to them...

This situation is so strange... I never expected this to happen. I.. I feel... Happy.

Grats on being an uncle, Rin.

[dadj]

📔 how bout one of zimelu being *nice* to his brothers? we've seen the jerk but now we need the heart of gold

XXXX, Fall

Dear brother,

So you know how I was worried about the boys getting along? More specifically a certain red one? Well I don't think I should be worried anymore.

So during one of the concerts.. well some of the fans got pretty rowdy and kind of swarmed the stage. No one got hurt thankfully, but when the dust cleared Eloni's hair ring was missing!

WHO STEALS A HAIR RING?! ... sorry.. but seriously?! who does that?!

Well anyways, Eloni was pretty upset about it... and I didn't have a spare made at the time... Zimelu usually was one to tease him about it and say that he looks better without it, but oddly enough he stayed quiet then. No snide remarks or anything.

Then we noticed Zimelu wasn't home very much, nor was he coming to practice! So I got angry at him! But do you know why he wasn't around? He was out trying to find the hair ring!

He actually found it too! Though that worries me a little.. what did he do to get that ring back?... Oh dear...

Anyways I found it was really sweet what he did for Eloni. He even wrapped it in a box and everything! I cried. So was Eloni... Actually so was Haym come to think of it... There was a lot of hugging involved ok?

...

I wish I could hug you again.

Good night Rin.

[dadj]

📔 about zimelu being mean to his brothers

XXXX, Summer

Dear brother,

Well I can safely say that my AI project was a success. Though... now I wonder how well this will work out...

Zimelu. He's  taken a liking to his bad boy persona and is a little rowdy. Maybe a little too rowdy. He pokes fun and teases his brothers constantly. He's testing their limits and how much they can take before they lash out. I guess that's his own way of learning about his brothers, but... It seems a little mean...

Guess it's normal for siblings to tease each other from time to time. Even fight. We've had our moments too. I... I just want them to get along... Am I being overbearing? What am I a dad? Ha! That's funny. I'd make a terrible parent.

Anyways.. I just wanted to vent my worries to you. I hope you are doing well, wherever you are.

Love you.

[dadj]

📔 a time when one (or multiple) of the boys disobeyed an order

XXXX, Winter

Dear brother,

Pardon me while I vent out some anger for a moment. Perhaps anger is too strong a sentiment to use. Frustrated? Insulted? Betrayed? An odd mix of all three...

My troops disobeyed an order today. This is the first time they've done so... It's just.. I told them to not enter my workshop! Even more so if I'm not present. There's sensitive equipment in there and they can get hurt! I told them! and yet... They went in...

I heard a ruckus and hurried to check. I thought maybe I had positioned something in there wrong and it had fallen over... But no. I go in to find all 5 of them there and a large power core on the ground and broken. That thing was for the factory I was working on! That thing could have let out a power surge strong enough to destroy them! All 5 gone in an instant! Heck the surge could of maybe found its way to me and killed me!

I was so mad! But not mad at the fact they broke the power core, but because they could of gotten destroyed... They're all grounded regardless...

Guess I'll have to start locking the door to the workshop... I didn't want to have to do that, but if that's what it takes...

Anyways.. Sorry to bother with that.

Love you.

[dadj]

📔 + the first journal after his brother died

The page is dirty and crumpled. Smeared ink makes the words hard to read.

No. No, no, no no! NO! NO YOU CAN'T BE GONE! HOW DARE HOW DARE YOU HOW DARE YOU!! YOU CAN'T LEAVE ME ALONE NOOOO!

This section is unreadable due to smudged ink and tear stains

I.. couldn't save you...

Who am I kidding?  

I can't save anyone... ...

Rin...

I'm scared...

I miss you.

May I come see you soon.