#celestial noise

[survivaldespair2-blog1]

Pancakes for Everyone | The End

Beep. “And thus the complete thesis on Atenism and the Amarna Heresy was published today by-” Beep. “All-star hip hop dancer clinches sixth national medal, more at-” Beep. “Ever wanted to be that creepy friend everyone fears but secretly loves on the inside? Call 1800-666-5354 today and ask for Kimiko Shir-”

Beep. “This is Yumie Yamauchi, coming to you from the top of the Golden Gate Bridge, where online sensation Nutty Neo is about to skateboard down the longest-”

The brunette sitting in front of the television screen giggled as she watched the daredevil practically drag the intrepid reporter down the ramp with him. In her lap was a bowl of pretzels, and even as she continued to watch, she popped a few more of them into her mouth.

Man, did it feel good to be alive again, and even though not all of them decided to take the opportunity, Haruka Mikazuki was not one to pass the golden opportunity up.

For a moment, everything was cold, but then it wasn’t. Her hands…her feet…her head…her heart…the Criminal Profiler awoke with a start, to find herself in a hospital bed not unlike the ones she would have seen in crime procedurals. She looked around - there was only one other bed there, and she would have thought the occupant wasn’t in until-

A pair of warm arms wrapped around her from behind. “Don’t snack too much now, Haruka-chan…We still have dinner with Yumie and her new girlfriend in a bit and if you eat too much you won’t have enough for-”

Pancakes. It was the warm smell of pancakes that greeted her, and in that moment she knew who it was. Wordlessly, she embraced Neo, the both of them holding onto each other for the longest time. Nothing needed to be said - in fact, what would you say the moment you can once again touch one another after having been separated by the very boundary of life and death itself?

“But you’re trying to snack on them too!” Haruka laughed, watching as Neo tried to reach for the bowl she was holding further and further away from his reach. With a tumble, he fell over the edge of the sofa, before looking up at her with pouty eyes. “Hey, no fair…”

“I-It’s not fair!” She cried bitterly. “There…There has to be s-someone! Please…” And there was someone. For the day after the doctors delivered the grave news, someone with a matching bone marrow was finally found. And it was-

DING-DONG!

Subconsciously, Neo touched the interior of his left elbow, and shook it off with a smile. “That must be Yumie, I should-” He was quickly silenced as Haruka pulled in him closer for a kiss. When they broke off, both had goofy grins on their faces, and Neo was first to crack. “I love you, but she’s at the door…”

“…She can wait.” And the two continued, oblivious to the continuing ring of the doorbell.

In the world as we know it, few things last for long. Even if the Earth is millions of billions of years old, its nature means what you expect to last forever is often gone by the next morning. But some things will not change. They will withstand the tests of time and fate, and in some cases, even life and death. None can be sure if Neo and Haruka will be together forever, or if another calamity will bring their rime to an abrupt halt. For now, it doesn't matter. Nothing matters except that they're both alive, remaining alive, and they are reunited at long last.

And with that, let us leave this tale behind. The Earth is a world of ten thousand stories. I have told you all I can of this one.

"GUYS I NEED THE TOILET REAL BAD OPEN UP!!“

Well, almost.

[survivaldespair2-blog1]

Or Say That I Drift Too Far | Tarou | Trial 4.3 | RE: everything going to shit, release, Hoshimi sorta??

[CW: dissociation?]

You deserve this. You deserve this.

Those words echoed in Tarou's head, familiar enough that he had no way of telling whether they were his own thoughts or spoken aloud. None of the vitriolic hate around him held an ounce of his conscious attention. Instead, the entire world had been turned upside down, accompanied by oh so much pain; fire burned in his lungs, his vision swam, his own hands clawed at his throat.

The pain was beyond anything Tarou's imagination had ever come up with. He gasped for air against the chain that cut across his neck, but the injuries all over his body from Renée's brutally violent struggles screamed out too. He'd never felt this before... never been in this body. This wasn't his body, he wasn't inside it. He wasn't him. Tarou hung there like a limp puppet, reacting to the repeated impacts of someone's heavily bruised legs kicking out as they feebly struggled to stay standing while their taller attacker pulled upwards. He shook someone else's vocal cords to elicit the desperate hacking and wheezing sounds that his classmates were enjoying so very much.

It's been hours, hours of Tarou silently begging some higher power he didn't believe in to pull the chain away.

When Joss finally relents, at first it is no relief. Only more agony. The feeling of air rushing down his throat feels as if someone is trying to put out the fire in his lungs using napalm and kitchen knives.

It only takes a moment for the immediate pain to subside, though, and Tarou's legs crumble. He falls to his knees, his head slumping against the podium in front of him. The wracking shudders of his shoulders and greedy gasps for air are beyond pathetic. For the first time in two years, Tarou tastes the salt of tears pouring down his cheeks.

As much as he wants to block out the world, Tarou can't stop himself from hearing all of... whatever you call this hell. He listens to them reassuring themselves that they're right or at least not as bad, that they're going to do good, when they are so unbelievably wrong. That their only evil act was the torture. Hah. Hah. Hah... He could just lie there. He really could, just let them commit the most evil act possible within these station walls. It would be easier than anything, all he had to do was stay where he was and take more greedy gasps of air.

But no. Tarou rose using the podium to support almost all of his weight, faced the center of the circle, and spat. Even in this state, his hoarse voice croaked with a note of conceit.

"W-Was I suppo-pposed to d-do it nicely? I. Had. No. Choice. Inaga–wggh... Inag–gccck..."

Before he could finish, Tarou's voice gave out and his head thumped back down onto the podium.

[survivaldespair2-blog1]

For The Tides, The Sun, The Sky | Tarou | Trial 4.1 | RE: Yumie, ATTN: Kimiko

After speaking with Yumie, Tarou hadn't had time to keep up with investigation before his own body lurched and marched towards the trial room. It sure wasn't of his accord, and his body's jerky steps weren't of its own accord either. He knew exactly whose orders his arms and legs were following, and that made it even worse.

They were thrown into the trial with no preamble, and Kayu's absence (from her usual spot, at least) made the already abnormal room seem even more... foreign? Alien. To Tarou's surprise, Yumie was the one to break the silence, with... the exact stupid theory she'd interrogated him about earlier. He cocked his head low, resting one cheek against his jacket's collar.

"Yamauchi-san, I didn't get an answer from you before we all got dragged here. What's that supposed to mean? That th' killer hates sweet things, that is? I'm not gonna blow up over it, but you can't just leave it at that. 'I hate sweet things' is not an incentive to murder."

Responding to Yumie was easy. Hopefully she'd find it easy to explain what the fuck she was talking about. Moving on to present evidence, however... it made him feel sick. He avoided looking at her, not daring to make eye contact. With as calm a voice he could manage, but one that still shook a little, Tarou addressed Kimiko.

"Setsuko-san. I found something early on in my investigation... something that you should know about. It was in the restaurant, underneath a table. Underneath that table you were hiding under a couple days ago, when everyone was together. There was a bloody hand towel there."

As if wanting to get the words out as fast as possible without becoming unintelligible, Tarou hardly paused in between sentences. Even so, he never looked up at the figure skater. He couldn't. He hated her so much, and yet that had no place here in the trial room.

"Someone tried to frame you. Th' towel was just tossed there, maybe in a rush. Just doesn't make sense for it to be there unless it was planted. So, like 'm telling you, I'm sure it's a trap."

"No mistake, I still don't trust you. But I can't ignore the facts in front of my eyes."

[survivaldespair2-blog1]

A Dying Planet | Arthur | Execution Reaction/Trial End [Closed for Aiko/Hoshimi]

After submitting his final vote, Arthur continued to simply sit with his head in his hands, face hidden from view. He had apparently checked out of the rest of the proceedings, and why not? What else was there to say? Certainly his contributions had only served to lead them in circles. He'd followed every clue except the right one. He supposes it's a good thing that Gernot was so persistent, it's a good thing they managed to find the correct answer in the end... but it doesn't feel that way. All he can think is that all of this is... it's all just...

It's so stupid.

Why is it happening? It was all so pointless, so avoidable, and yet one of his friends is dead and another is suffering, about to suffer even more. Arthur doesn't want Kimiko to suffer, she doesn't deserve this, and Kosami shouldn't have to die. Farid shouldn't have had to die either- he didn't have to die, why would they ever think this was a good plan? A good idea? Why, why, why?

Arthur is too exhausted, too raw, to feel angry anymore. He's tired, and hurt, his head and his chest ache, seemingly in tandem. He feels the urge to cry, to sob even, but it just isn't coming out. He sits there, quiet and shaking, his breathing coming either in shallow, rapid bursts or, when he exerts the effort, in slow, measured inhales and exhales. It doesn't help. Not enough, anyway.

He doesn't even look up when Kayu announces those going into the Nowhere. First Tarou, Yuudai, and Kisuke... that hurts too, that's worrying, Kisuke shouldn't have to go in that place, Kisuke is his friend, despite everything, and that place is horrible and...

Oh, that's his own name. Right after Neo's.

Arthur shudders and finally raises his head, staring at Kayu for a moment as if hoping he'd misheard. He looks over at Neo slowly, eyes wide but expression otherwise blank, unreadable. He's still shaking. He needs to get out of here, he needs to leave, he needs to breathe. He can't breathe.

Kosami fades with a final plea.

“I don’t want to die–”

Arthur feels sick.

The execution plays, and he watches, already too hurt to feel it. His gaze is dull, detached, but he watches it.

When Kimiko starts screaming, Arthur passes out.

[survivaldespair2-blog1]

sunshine | hoshimi | body reaction

All the wounds Hoshimi had suffered in the Nowhere could not compare to the pain she felt when she saw who the body belonged to. It was worse than when the fakers tore her to shreds, ending the life she held in that moment. This pain struck her to the very core, and there was no wound to show for it, no reprieve for the stabbing at her heart that struck her each second she kept staring at the body... Atty's body.

Hoshimi screams.

Dropping to her knees, eyes closed, she wails. This wasn't supposed to happen! She wanted to apologize, needed to apologize for what she'd said before. But she'd run out of time, she was too slow, too selfish, too proud.

There are others, rushing towards his body, holding him, kissing him, declaring their love. Hoshimi stays back, sobbing, curled up, hands over her face. She's alone, and she never got to say sorry, and now she never will. Atty probably died thinking she hated him, thinking she wanted him to suffer. She didn't, she was just angry and confused and proud.

Your pride will destroy you, Hoshimi, if you're not careful.

It was destroying her, from the inside out. If she had just apologized, if she hadn't taken things so personally in the first place. Even now, she was just so selfish. There were others who needed comforting, and here she was crying, lamenting about how she didn't get to say 'sorry'.

She'd never learn, would she? She'd just keep carrying on this way, until it was her body lying there.

[survivaldespair2-blog1]

The Walking Not-So-Dead | Neo | Chapter 3 | Closed for Renée

Man, did it feel good to be back on both feet. Sure, nyooming around on an office chair was fun, and in a way, it led to his relationship upgrade with Haruka (her lips...they tasted like maple syrup and pancakes), but when you've been on both feet for the better part of your life, you'll want to have the freedom to dash about to and fro. Plus, no need for awkward bathroom routines.

"Uwaaaah..." Neo yawned, stretching his arms, before wincing slightly as it caused his stomach to twitch. It had been a stressful time in the Nowhere, no thanks to the Indigo Child who decided to be a game-breaker and leave her boss room to slam him into the ground. He had died, sure, but hey, at least he was alive again, and now had his legs to use- Wait. Is that who he thought it was...?

Uh oh. Walking on her own way to the Lower Concourse toilets was a very familiar face. After all, the dungeon run before his latest one, he had gone in with Renée Durant, and they had both come out none the better. Much worse, in fact - the last time they had seen each other, Neo's legs were still in the casts that Arthur had made for him. But now that he was walking on his two feet...she certainly wasn't going to be very happy with him, was she?

Oops, there she is. She's noticed him. Time to play up that Enjou charm.

"Uh...Um, h-hello, Renée-san...I can explain...?"

Hoo boy. Here we go.

[survivaldespair2-blog1]

Pharmaceuticals || Kisuke Closed for Yuudai

Kisuke seemed to be in a deep meditation, especially after that trial, he was going to need some help from within. The day seemed to melt with the night, and Kisuke had no idea what time it was... Was this also a push towards despair? Kisuke was trapped in an endless loop... What was a boy to do? Well... Maybe Yuudai could help him out with that.

Kisuke stumbled into the pharmacy, his face pallor, dark circles underneath his eyes. Red hair was frazzled, clothes were disheveled. Kisuke shuffled in, his eyes immediately scanning the shelves for anything to help him with his struggles. Haruka told him to meditate, to breathe and focus on himself, but it never worked alone.He had an itch that needed to be scratched... Soon, Kisuke was grabbing anything he could get his hands on, from simple painkillers, to boxes of mints.

Arms full of items that he didn't really need, Kisuke was ready to run out, his goal met, his items brought to his attention. Maybe one of these could help the boy calm down... But his pharmacy run cut short when he bumped into the shorter blonde young man, falling forward and spilling the contents from his clutches. Oh goodness gracious, now someone was going to question him...!

"I-I am... I apologize...! I did not intend to push myself into you... Forgive me.." Kisuke didn't even look up to whom he had bumped into, only grabbing his loot and scooping it back into his arms.

[survivaldespair2-blog1]

eternal sunshine | aiko | [closed for kisuke]

It had been over a full day since the last trial, and Aiko still hadn't calmed down completely. Sure, they were no longer crying, but they were on edge and every little noise was making them jump. There was nothing to do except journey into the nowhere, and they'd be damned if they did that again (although, the prospect of finding Clues in there was slowly making the idea of going back more appealing).

That boredom lead Aiko to the bookstore. Surely they could find something they hadn't read yet. It wasn't as if they'd read every book in the world, especially considering how they'd typically stuck to sci-fi novels before. Now, however, the idea of what many of those novels had as content made Aiko sick. They were currently living the stories they'd once devoured with enthusiasm, after all, and it was definitely not all it was cracked up to be.

"Hmm.... boring... predictable-soundin'... not a good topic considerin' current circumstances.... oh, maybe this one?"

There was a growing pile next to them of books they deemed boring or inappropriate for the moment, but this seemed like the first one going into a new pile of books they approved of. However, their literal judging a book by it's cover (and summary) was interrupted when someone else entered the room.

"Oh! Hey Kisuke!" Despite the fact that they'd never talked to him outside Occult Club Shenanigans, Aiko greeted him like they would a close friend. "Have ya read any a th' books in here? I'm lookin' fer somethin' new."