I'm genuinely contemplating asking my parents for a new computer for christmas
But idk... I feel bad about it. My parents don't exactly swim in money and I hate asking them for gifts, even though I'm really really happy when they give me little presents because they want to.
But I'm a bit jealous of J and of my mom, who now can use her new computer. And it's so shiny and pretty and can at least run Minecraft, whereas my puter can't even run Vampire Bloodlines. It's depressing, even more so since I'd really love to start working with Flash and Blender, but my computer just can't take it. There's little to no space left on the hard drive and... well, Toshi-Chan is an old man by now. He can't handle 3D stuffs that well anymore. When I got him, I loved making videos with the Windows Movie Maker, and they turned out pretty good. I'd still love to make videos - tutorials for drawing, speeded up videos of me drawing, maybe little illustrated music videos with help of Flash. But it's just not really an option, because I can't get any video edit program to work on Toshi-Chan anymore.
So yeah... I love my computer to bits, I'm actually super affectionate towards it and I usually use all of my things until they are so broken they fall apart in my hands. My headphones are prone to have little bursts of static by now, but I keep using them and will until I can't hear any music through them anymore. The computer I had before Toshi-Chan I kept using when the speakers broke and after the display went black for good, I dragged an old 90's monitor into my room to be able to still use my laptop with it.
And looking at that, I just feel like I am a really spoiled brat for wanting a new computer even though Toshi-Chan still works fine, just not like a brand new gamer pc. I guess I even feel bad because of Toshi-Chan, because I bond with things I own quite a bit (especially mobile phones and computers, don't laugh at me DX) and I feel like outsourcing a hard-working, experienced and loyal employee just because he's getting old. It's almost like replacing a friend because he's of "no use" to me anymore, and I don't like that thought.
So, I don't want to burden my family with this, I feel bad for my puter-baby and... and of course, there are other things I wish for and that would maybe be more rational. Like... Asking to balance out my bank account. That would "only" be 1/3 of the price my parents would have to pay for the computer I'd like (I actually did a lot of research already and read through several reviews, the best offer I can find is the Medion Erazer X6819) but that's still more than I'd like to ask for.
Still, this wish would be actually reasonable. A new computer would be reasonable-ish too, I guess, so I could start working with the tools I want to use for a living later on, but I don't know. I feel like such a spoiled brat. White whine much...