so i have officially fucked up royally. I have fucked up so badly that I am now scared to leave my room for fear of embarrassment. for fear of running into someone, whom I have affected in literally the last way I could ever want to affect someone.
like do you ever have a secret, and then get paranoid that someone knows the secret? well i had that. and i thought everything was fine and dandy and i was all relieved from my fear. and then something happened that was a very clear indicator that this person knows. and now i have no idea how to interact with this person. and i'm stuck living in the same building with them for at least a year. and we have tonnes of mutual friends so it's basically guaranteed that i will see said person again.