#core: lacking humanity

[the-rot-outside]

There's always been something about the kudzu plant that stuck out to me. It grows over things, overtaking them and smothering out its life. I want a kudzu plant to grow over my body and overtake it for its own.

[the-rot-outside]

I shambled my way outside to enjoy the nature. I alternated between laying and sitting down in the grass beneath a tree. The shade shielded me from the extreme heat of the sun while I listened to music and let ants crawl all over me. I may regret it later if any of them bit me. For now, however, it was a satisfying experience. Even now inside, there's an ant still crawling on me.

[the-rot-outside]

There's something affirming about having bugs crawl over your body.

[the-rot-outside]

Introduction.

Hello. Most of my information is in my header, but I feel it would be a good idea to make myself a pinned post as well.

My name is Core. I've recently discovered the otherkin community and have realized that I my most prevalent kintype is zombiekin, but I also feel a connection to being robotkin and puppetkin, more specifically marionettekin.

I intend to use this blog to both post and repost things relating to my various kintypes. Maybe I'll encounter people that I can interact with on here as well.

I don't have a DNI, as I will simply block you if I don't like your vibes. If I find myself using this blog to post things that could be triggering, I will update this section to include it so anyone checking out this place can stay safe and choose to not interact with me.

Farewell.

Tags.

Main Alterhuman - #core: lacking humanity

My Posts - #core speaks

Zombiekin - #core: rotting outside

Robotkin/Machinekin - #core: wires within

Puppetkin/Marionettekin - #core: strings attached

Not Alterhuman Related - #core: after hours

Nature Posting - #core: gentle breeze

Other Blogs

I don't always find myself making posts that match the themes of this blog. Find me in these other locations.

@corrupture-industries - More silly based posting, life updates, and oc posting.

@just-another-dog-boy - Dog therian and forcemasc posts.

[the-rot-outside]

It has been a strange experience realizing that I am alterhuman. There has always been a part of me that has never felt quite human, or even alive. Yet, I was able to dismiss those thoughts as gender dysphoria. While transitioning was able to alleviate some of my feelings of discontent towards myself, it has never fully gone away.

Now I realize why I never felt alive, why the sensation of my own pulse makes me feel unease, why my other bodily functions have always left me uncomfortable.

[the-rot-outside]

Today as a reward for getting through about half of my final project, I took a walk around a path by my local library. It took around half an hour to make a full circuit around, as I just walked along it enjoying the nature. I'm not sure if any other zombies experience this, but part of my experience as one involves a deep connection to nature. Dead, rotting things belong as part of the ecosystem, and feel more connected to it than humans seem to.

I should take more walks.

[the-rot-outside]

A part of me feels warped, twisted. I push myself through the day to day activities of life, yet I feel a disconnect from it all. What does it mean to be alive if what I feel is undeath?

I don't want to be sitting in my school's library, putting on a farce of being productive. I need to... I don't know what I need to. Not be here, I suppose.

[the-rot-outside]

Something that happened during the one and a half months or so that I was gone is that I discovered that I'm some kind of dog kin. However, how I feel when I'm dog-like and how I feel when I'm more attached to the kins that are part of this blog are very different.

When I feel up to it, I should make a sideblog for dogposting.