Send help. I never NEVER had feelings for a man what's or ever, I DID make out with one before and didn't like it. But I was at one of my best friends Birtday this weekend and and one of the guys there. The most attractive person I have seen since the creation of life. He is EXTREMELY hot, fluffy brown hair, blue eyes, giant hands, nice built, and his personality. Fucking beautiful personality.
I vibes with him pretty ok at the start, was lowkey scared bc of the straightness of some of my babygirls (best friend) male friends, but they seemed ok, and ARE ok, after explaining some things, like that asking someone if they one were a different gender is not ok in any way, shape or form. But they got it pretty quickly and did SO not have a problem with any of us.
So one of the straight friends was this guy, I somehow liked him from the start, but also scared of him (for reasons named before). Then, with the Alkohol came also me being more open and touchy, which was ALSO not a problem, cuddled with my ex, danced with my best friends ex (she is alright as a person, but I HATE her as his partner, she is awful at that).
What happened then is that I also cuddled with the cute/hot guy, and we shared a mattress (??). Then some other things happened, like slight touching and kissing and just BIG time cuddling, and I really liked it, which I don't normally do.
He is also very nice, like I had a sight mental breakdown bc my bestie was "mad" at me (he was stressed, and thought he saw something, that he didn't) so I was bawling my eyes out, amd he handled it SO well. Everyone of my friends liked him and wanted to adopt him into our group. He also didn't mention anything about that night the next day and made sure I was doing ok.
So now I have an sexuality crisis, it took so long to accept that I don't like men, that I'm a lesbian, and I REALLY didn't think that would change. I'm so confused by this whole thing. I even thought that even IF I like the guy, I'd still consider myself a lesbian, because it's like half a cent of the richest man's fortune.
So the situation now is that im snaping and texting with him. I even sent babygirl slay queen (my himbo beat friend) to investigate, but all he found out is that cute-guy likes me, but that he is unsure if he is ready for a relationship and does not yet know what the thing between us could be. He also apparently thinks I'm pretty, which ( :))) sowjshussh) , is nice. He couldn't find out more because cute-guy is scared that my mate could maybe hurt him (he is very protective of me, like REALLY soooo, maybe his fear is not completely without reason).
So now I'm snaping with the guy™️ and I lowkey, really like him. I can't stop staring at the pictures he sends and stuff, waiting for the next notification.
I know, this post has like absolutely no structure in any way, but it also is just me pouring out my current crisis. If this thing with him goes south and we do not work out or even get in a relationship, then I will 100% still consider myself a lesbian. My plan right now is to look where this whole thing is going and then talk to him about the whole label thing, and if he would be OK with me still calling myself a lesbian (I know its wierd, give me time to work though this crisis. I need it)
I lowkey would be thankful for people's opinions on this whole thing. Vent over.
