#crying btw

[bitingdrivers]

well at least max can go home to his baby

[ben-solo-s]

just finished my project hail mary reread goddamn

[joshsandersons]

yeah

[trysting-foes]

Watching the game for the anze kopitar of it all

[stedesbonnet]

just finished reading tlg…….. nobody even LOOK in my general direction for 72 hours, i’m gonna need some time to process this one lads

[sadmemegf]

happy late late toy show night to all who celebrate 🫶🏻

[azfudd]

The fact that this sweet baby angel has read the words “I spent half my time loving her and the other half hiding how much I loved her.”. I am not okay.

[yeahcanigetuhhhhh]

⠀

the subject of conversation is a task that hasnt yet been completed by either of us, and im about to vulnerably bring up my executive dysfunction, when before i can say they words, they lre come at me talking about their ultrahigh functionality and how its tiring them. they start listing off all the ways their life is so busy. one cool pursuit on top of another, this responsibility and that responsibility theyre attending to, working and then working some extra hours on top of that, pursuing higher ed at simultaneously, and, and, and. wait, what is this all supposed to communicate to me again?…it has something to do with the task which hasnt gotten done…oh, youre saying youre functional, and you use your functionality to pile your plate way higher than you can handle, and then it makes you not have time to attend to smaller things. uh. what do i say to that?

i on the other hand have “all the time in the world” but i put off a necessary task which takes 5 minutes for months on end, and i scream at myself every day to do it yet somehow am still unable. my life is so not-full. i have the bare minimum in it. and it is still so fucking hard to do anything. to initiate, to complete, anything. so, when someone comes to me, talking all this shit about how busy they are,…i…

idk. i feel like i have no place. if someone has just said all that about overbusyness being why they cant do a thing, what do i say about why i cant do it? -- god, they must think im lazy. a bum who freeloads with no schedule. theyre right arent they. right insofar as, if theres any other truth about my disability and Why Im Like This, its so fucking invisible and difficult for me to describe and convey that it might as well not exist.

i dont feel i have a right to say anything and i dont think it would matter if i did, because how can a person like them try to understand what its like on this far side? the only ones who 'get' it and me are the ones whose exec dysfunc is just as bad. to anyone else im afraid ill just be written off…they have 'real reasons' to not do the task; i dont.