#cuddlebunches

[dikdikrising]

gronkhonk and cuddleybunchy

Absolutely correct in the sense that they're completely wrong for each other and would make a terrible couple! Gronk despises her boundless unguided energy and Cuddles is completely bored by books, numbers, and people that attempt to talk to her about books and numbers

And yet in spite of this they have had multiple clutches together

Why? because the Scarred Wasteland is a place where hellish conditions conspire to foster terrible life decisions

And not because I was new to the game and breeding whatever dragons I had available like a five year old smashing naked Barbies together

[dikdikrising]

thog and cuddlebunchesss

When he was first inducted into Macrophage’s forces, Thog was a bit nervous. They hadn’t been under someone else’s leadership for a long time, and went out of their way to meet and (try to) make a good first impression with each of their commanding officers.

While Cuddlebunches is technically a commanding officer, she doesn’t really care to give orders, or really make herself available in any convenient way, so Thog’s first day ended up turning into a self-imposed manhunt (despite multiple people warning them not to bother). Once Thog finally tracked her down, she had already come back to the banquet hall to start her nightly food rampage.

Surprisingly, Thog wasn’t frustrated after wasting an entire day. Rather, as the former leader of a horde, they were deeply impressed, and felt more at home than ever before. Since then, the two of them became fast friends, and often challenge each other to impromptu eating and wrestling contests (sometimes both at once.) Thog even manages to win every once in a while.

[dikdikrising]

💬 cuddlebunches and gronkhork?

Oh, right. Her. That animated strip of beef jerky that is somehow a walking stomach despite no longer HAVING a stomach. Or internal organs. Can your tiny mind even conceive of the quantity of our food stores she runs through in a single month? Let alone the budget? Whatever figures you’re running in your head, double them. I can only assume the Matriarch tolerates her gluttony because she’s so efficient at dispatching invading forces. Frankly, I think they’re just scared off by her sheer enthusiasm-

HI GRONK GUESS WHAT I FOUND?? YEP THE PILE OF ANTIQUE SECOND AGE COINS YOU JUST FINISHED POLISHING!! YOU REALLY SHOULD GET BETTER SAFES BY THE WAY THAT ONE WENT RIGHT TO PIECES AFTER I CHUCKED IT OFF A FEW CLIFFS. ANYWAY WANT TO SEE HOW FAST I CAN RUB THEM TOGETHER BRBRBRBRB OH WOW THEY JUST CRUMBLE AFTER A FEW SECONDS HUH. NEAT!! WELL YOUR FACE IS LONGER AND ANGRIER THAN USUAL SO LONG SEE YOU AT THE BANQUET HALL TONIGHT!! LOVE YA YOU POINTY IDIOT [BONE CRUNCHING HUG] BYEEEEEeeeeeₑₑₑₑₑₑ

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those cost me 200 gems apiece