heloooo randy :D may your day be full of much joyousness and fun,, i would like to request aaaa LISA CUDDY X FTM READER !!! there is the obvious transphobia just by product of early 2000s humor and the early 2000s was truly just Like That so i think having cuddy fall for a trans man would 1. be massively indulgent for me and 2. i think introduce significant conflict that would make for a satisfying arc where suddenly the vague hypothetical trans person is no longer just an inautonomous entity that exists purely for the punchline of a joke but rather a prominent undeniably human person with agentic capacity that has a voice
you don’t by any means have to include the romance aspect of it if you’re not comfortable,, just a trans character having agency would be more than epicc
pretty pleasies and thank youuu,, :^]
“The risk I’m willing to take for you.”
Summary: You’re the first trans doctor in Princeton-Plainsboro Teaching Hospital. And Cuddy is conflicted with how she feels about you because of the time being.
Pairings: Lisa Cuddy x ftm!reader
Genre: Internalized conflict, mention of transphobia, use of female language for reader like once in the beginning, yearning to earn 🙂↕️
Notes: HELLO !!!! I am so sorry this took so long to publish, I really hope you really like this after I made you wait for so long. I also really hope this matches your expectations 🙏
Words: 2.25k
You were fairly new to House’s team, just working for him for just under a year. Being the first, and only trans team member, you were typically the butt of House’s jokes and mockeries. But, despite that, you were smart. You knew what you were doing.
“Patient’s got seizures and weak legs.”
Said Foreman. You looked up from the files and over to him.
“Could be Meningioma.”
House laughed. He leaned against his cane as he stood at the head of the table in the office. He looked directly at you.
“Right, because the girl who thinks she’s a guy will know what’s wrong. It’s not Meningioma, this is just a patient overreacting to having epilepsy.”
Turns out you were right.
Cuddy didn’t know how she felt. She knew you were intelligent. Anyone with two eyes could see that. Yet, she felt conflicted with the fact you were trans. It was new to her completely. She had never met someone who was trans, let alone having them working under her.
When she had hired you, on your files it still said you were a female (because of the time being you couldn’t just go and change it that easily). So, she was shocked when she saw a man walk into her office for the interview.
She respected you, yes. She wasn’t going to be someone who went out of their way to be transphobic on purpose. Most of the time, she got your pronouns right, but every now and then she’d accidentally slip up from being used to your file, but she corrects herself.
She still has a hard time believing that you were born a female. She’d been questioning herself by the fact that she does think you’re handsome.
And she quite literally couldn’t tell anyone about this. Especially not House. House would absolutely tear her to shreds if he found out. She’d never hear the end of it.
But, she admired you. The way you didn’t let any comments affect you in any way. House’s comments wouldn’t stop you from doing a damn good job in your position. And she admired it.
She always thought that if she were in your shoes, she wouldn’t be able to take the harsh words from House well.
She sat in her office, head in her hands as she let out a sigh. She didn’t know what to do. Whether to own up to her feelings, or let them simmer within her and hope they just go away. She didn’t know what it was like to go out with a trans person. What if she did the wrong thing and ending up hurting you?
She huffed, shaking her head from those thoughts. She got up from her desk and walked out of her office, and going up to the floor where House’s office was. Her heels clacked against the floor, notifying anyone nearby that she was there.
She found you in the lab, running some tests House had made you do. You had bags under your eyes. It was one of those cases where House didn’t let you leave for days. You looked as if death was at your door and that it was calling your name.
“Doctor [Y/L/N].”
She said, in a softer tone than she expected. But, it caused you to look up at her. You gave her a tired smile and say up a bit straighter.
“Doctor Cuddy. What can I help you with?”
You hummed, trying to stay as positive as you could, despite the fact that you felt like you were going to pass out any minute.
She inhaled, staying quiet for a moment before speaking.
“You deserve a break when this is all done. You look like you’re working yourself to death here.”
A beat, then quieter.
“I’m inviting you to dinner after the case is over. There’s a restaurant downtown that just opened and I’ve wanted to try it, but no one to go with.”
You blinked, just staring at her. You couldn’t believe what you just heard. You were convinced that it was the tiredness taking over you. You didn’t respond for a good few seconds, which made her nervous. And then, you gave her a tired smile.
“Does the dinner come before or after I can sleep?”
To which, she let out a soft exhale of relief as she grinned at you.
“After. I’ll let you know more when the case is finished.”
And with that, she left the lab with her heart racing and a smile on her face.
The rest of the long week came and went, finally figuring out what was wrong with the patient. You were finally able to go home and rest.
And that’s exactly what you did. You slept for what felt like a whole day. Well, that was until your phone started ringing. You jolted awake at the sudden noise, and turned over, seeing your phone vibrating on the nightstand.
You rubbed your eyes before reaching over and grabbing it, flipping it open and putting it against your ear.
“Hello.?”
You asked groggily, to which you were met with a soft gasp on the other end of the line.
“I’m sorry, did I wake you?”
You heard from the other end. You smiled tiredly as you recognized the voice on the other end.
“No it’s fine, Cuddy.”
You reassured her, running your fingers through your hair. She let out a small sigh, a faint smile on her lips on her end.
“Well, I just wanted to call you to give you more details about the restaurant.”
She said, and then continuing to give you more information about the restaurant. You nodded to yourself as you processed the information.
“I made us a reservation at 7, so I’ll see you then.”
To which you gave a hum of agreement. You both hung up and you shut your phone. You glanced over at the clock. 3pm. You had time.
And then you fell back asleep until around 5:30.
When you awoke, you felt a lot more refreshed than you did the first time you woke up. You got out of bed, going to the bathroom to be able to shower and freshen up.
When you had gotten out, you looked through your closet, trying to find something that was somewhat decent. You didn’t know what kind of restaurant this would be. Whether it was high-end, or just a casual dinner, you weren’t sure. So, you decided on something more business casual so it could be fine for both.
You slipped on your clothing and finished getting yourself ready, doing your hair, putting on any jewelry, etc. (if you want any of that 😛)
You checked the time and saw it was 6:15. You grabbed your phone and your keys and slipped out into the evening.
It wasn’t too bad of a drive, you just wanted to make sure you got there on time because you hadn’t been there before.
You parked your car when you had gotten there, stepping out and looked at the restaurant. It seemed like an in between of what you thought it could be, so that was great.
You made your way inside and inside you found Cuddy, waiting for you. She looked gorgeous.
Her natural curls sitting on her shoulders, her makeup done, while wearing a dark red dress with matching heels.
When she saw you, a gentle smile formed on her lips as her heart raced in her chest. She stepped forward and got closer to you.
“[Y/L/N], you made it. You look great.”
She greeted you, her eyes meeting yours. You gave her a warm smile, your hands in your pockets.
“‘Course I did. And I could say the same about you.”
You weren’t lying. You thought she truly was gorgeous. But, you believed she would never want to be with someone like you.
“Thank you.”
She said, that gentle smile on her lips still, her cheeks tinted a slight pink. You blinked, thinking you were seeing things.
The both of you stood in silence for a moment before the host called her name to say that there was a table ready.
You both followed the man to your table, pulling the chair out for her before you sat yourself across from her.
You both glanced at the menu, and she stayed quiet for a moment before glancing up at you.
“Would you care to share a bottle of wine?”
She offered, her gaze searching yours to see how you would react. You glanced up from the menu and let her words sit in the air for a moment before finally giving a small nod.
“Yeah. I’d like that.”
You accepted her offer with a gentle smile. She glanced back down at the menu as you discussed the wine options. (I’m not going into it cause I know NOTHING about alcohol..)
The waiter came over and took both of your orders, leaving with the menus as well. You both sat in silence for a few moments before she spoke up.
“[Y/L/N], I invited you here because I wanted to talk to you about something.”
And your heart sank. Your thoughts immediately began to flood with possibilities of where this could be going. You thought this dinner was to give you a break. Were you getting fired and this was the lightest way she could tell it to you?
“I’ve.. well, I actually don’t know how to put this.”
She starts, her fingers playing with the ends of her dress. At her words, your face paled. You balled your hands into fists in your lap, squeezing them tight, then loosening, and then tightening again.
“Are you firing me?”
“No! God, no. You’re one of the best we have in the hospital. And one of the few who can manage to deal with House.”
She quickly reassured you, realizing that her first comment came off as it sounding that she was firing you. You relaxed quite a bit when she said she wasn’t firing you.
She inhaled quietly, shutting her eyes for a moment. She was *so* conflicted. It was an internal war with herself. With how society was, she could be shamed, and even fired if something were to happen here and anyone were to find out.
“[Y/L/N], you’re a handsome guy.”
She started, and her words made your cheeks tint pink. Your eyes searched her face, trying to figure out what she wanted to say through her expression, but you couldn’t read it.
“Thank you, Cuddy.”
“And because of that, I’ve been conflicted with myself.”
You furrowed your eyebrows at those words. You kept trying to read her expression, but she was giving you nothing to work with.
She inhaled and was about to continue when the waiter came with the wine. He served it to the both of you and left the bottle before leaving you two alone again.
“I’ve never had someone who is trans in my life. Like ever. Until you came along. And I’ve been trying to shove these feelings down, because *I* don’t know how I feel about them, but they just won’t go away. And I just—“
You cut her off from her rambling as you reached over and took her hand in yours. Her breath hitched as she looked up at you. You didn’t even realize what you were doing until it had already been done.
“I know. I get it. It’s weird having a type of person you’re not used to being around suddenly involved in your life.”
“That’s not the point I’m trying to make. Well, it is, but—“
She cut herself off. She needed a moment. She took a deep breath, letting herself relax for a moment. She gave your hand a squeeze as if to stable herself.
“I don’t know what to do with my feelings for you when I like you, [Y/L/N].”
Now your breath hitched. You looked at her, trying to find some fault in her eyes. But, there was none. She was being 100% serious.
“Cuddy, I— I don’t know what to say.”
You admitted to which she froze slightly. And you caught that completely. You gave her hand a squeeze of reassurance.
“I didn’t mean that in a bad way! It’s just— you’re gorgeous and you make my heart race every time I see you and I mean.. I don’t want you risking your job for me.”
You said, your tone quieter at the last part. Your gaze softening as you looked at her. She glanced down at her lap, letting out an exhale before glancing back up at you.
“If something were to happen between us, it would be a violation of the hospital..”
She started, knowing that practically in any job it’s a violation dating someone in the work place, especially when one is the other’s boss.
“But, I’m willing to take that risk.”
She said with a gentle smile, to which you returned that smile. You gave her hand a gentle squeeze before speaking.
“Then I’m willing to as well.”
You said before grabbing your glass with your free hand and held it up to her. She grabbed hers and clinked it with yours. She took a sip from her glass, but instead of doing that yourself, you pulled her hand closer and closer until your lips met the back of her hand.
Because for the first time since you’ve transitioned, you’ve found someone who sees you for who you are, and not just what you identify as.
I really hoped you like this and that it meets your expectations!! Again I am so sorry this took so long to get out 💔 but I hope you have a great rest of your day/night!!