Midnight Pals: Withered Hill
David Barnett: submitted for the approval of the midnight society, i call this the tale of withered hill Barnett: its about this woman who gets trapped in this weirdly horny british village Barnett: for being too big a slut Mary Shelley: lol no such thing
Edward Lee: bro Lee: bro Lee: where is this village? Barnett: oh you wouldn't want to go to this village Barnett: everyone there is just horny and fucking all the time Barnett: just walking around with big ol' boners Lee: bro Barker: yeah i would really like you to answer edward's question
Barnett: no no it's not hot Barnett: it's actually quite charming Barnett: once you get used to it Barnett: you know, its just really quite quaint and british
Angela Carter: excuse me you're saying that if a woman is sexual she should be punished Barnett: no no of course not Barnett: she didn't actually get trapped for being too big a slut' Barnett: there were other reasons Barnett: her being a slut is purely incidental
Barnett: i assure you, her predicament has nothing to do with her voracious sexual appetite Carter: ah ok Carter: well Carter: good Barnett: its actually cuz she buys too many panties
Barnett: she's always buying panties Barnett: just an insane amount of panties Piers Anthony: [nodding] right right
Barnett: now if she was buying a reasonable amount of panties that would be one thing Barnett: but this is just far too many panties Anthony: what kind of panties Barnett: oh i don't know Barnett: just the regular kind, i guess Barnett: you know, like Barnett: girl panties
Anthony: I need details! Anthony: Is it pretty in pink or all see-through? Anthony: Is it showing off her brand new lower back tattoo?
Anthony: I don't have to guess the color of her underwear Anthony: I already know what she's got goin' on down there Anthony: It's that lacy black pair with the black fishnets Anthony: the ones i know she bought on the internet Anthony: I saw them when she sat down, they were peekin' out Anthony: I'm gonna tell you right now, they're all I'm thinkin' about
Barnett: the thing is this woman is so wasteful that she wears her panties once and throw them out Anthony: [huffing big wad of panties] I wanna try it, bite it, lick it, spit it, pull it to the side and get all up in it
Barnett: this woman, like, drinks a bottle of wine in a night Patricia Highsmith: hmm seems kinda light Barnett: sometimes two bottles Highsmith: ah now we're talkin! Highsmith: what a dame!!
Barnett: she's just drinkin' booze and buying panties Barnett: and that's wasteful Barnett: do you know what percentage of landfill is made up of single-use panties? Barnett: ITS A LOT
