Flirtatious Fate
Rafael Barba x Fem! Detective! Reader Tags: Near smut. Lots of flirting. Barba and Reader almost get caught. Sonny being a great advice giver. Word Count: 6.5k "And what if we are? Would that be such a bad thing?"
It wasn't at all uncommon for the counselor to work overtime.
Rafael more than likely worked more overtime hours than any of the attorneys in the whole building. He lived for his work, so it was no shock that it was nearly 8:00 o'clock and he was still buried in his work with no intention of going anywhere anytime soon. Most of the building had thinned out. All the people who were much better at maintaining a work-life balance had left hours ago - leaving Rafael as practically the only one left. Not that he minded, he could always work better alone.
But he didn't mind having some company. There were a few faces that he always was always welcome to and would always make time for...especially one in particular.
His attention was stolen away from his work when there was a knock on his open door, obviously indicating that someone was there to see him. Clearly, he wasn't the only one who pulled a lot of overtime hours.
He knew exactly who was at his door just by the specific sound of the knock. He wasn't sure how he knew, but he did - and his heart fluttered at the knowledge of the person at his door.
Their relationship was complicated, although neither of them realized that the way they acted toward one another made things a gray area. They simply believe they were colleagues...friendly colleagues at best. Somehow, neither of them really realized that their dynamic came from a much more personal and emotional place.
Nonetheless, he was happy she was there...even though he didn't realize it.
"Come in, detective." He said, without even giving a glance up from what he was working on.
A genuine smile was on the detective's face at the sound of his invitation. She entered the room with a cup of coffee in each hand, her foot kicking the door closed behind her as she entered. She was alone in her entrance, and the fact that her partner wasn't with her let him know this wasn't a business visit.
“Counselor,” She greeted. “Do you have time for coffee and a chat?”
If there was any single person in the world who could outdrink Rafael Barba when it came to coffee - it was [Y/N]. She could drink coffee at any time of day and could put down at least four cups a day. That was one thing they shared - they worked a lot and ran on nothing much pure passion for their job and heavy amounts of caffeine.
Rafael looked at her then, curious and intrigued. He wondered where her partner was, considering she was still dressed in her work attire, which also let him know she wasn't done working for the day.
"Be my guest," He gestured to the chair opposite his desk, leaning back in his own seat knowing he was about to be distracted completely. "What brings you here?"
She approached him, handing him a hot latte that was fresh and just to his liking. As coffee connoisseurs, they had entertained plenty of coffee conversations in the past. He wasn't really at all shocked that she knew his preference in coffee. He watched her from over the rim of his cup as she sat down with her own drink, clearly very comfortable in his presence.
"Carisi is upstairs talking to someone, so I figured I'd stop by and say hello." She said casually, but the sparkle in her eye let him know she had come by for more than a quick greeting.
A small smirk appeared on his face when he caught that look in her eyes. He knew her too well. She was here for a bigger reason. They were always usually very to the point with each other. They saw no reason to waste time when she was here with a purpose.
"Is that so? You came all this way just to say 'hello' to me?" He asked, a hint of playfulness in his normally dry tone.
She shrugged, a knowing grin appearing on her face as she ran her finger absentmindedly around the lid of her cup.
"Well..." She began. "I might have something interesting to tell you."
Now this made more sense. The coffee, the late visit, the giddiness. She was here to gossip - a habit that she frequently and flat out denied that she ever took part in.
"Okay," He nodded, his smirk now turning more curious. "Don't keep me in suspense."
She set her coffee down on his desk, now sitting up completely straight as she used both her hands to talk. He knew she had something big if she was this focused.
"You know how I'm kind of friends with the secretary on the fifth floor of the precinct?" She asked, jogging his memory. "Remember how I was telling you she had been acting strange?"
Rafael's eyes darted around the room as he racked his brain. mentally sorting through hundreds, if not thousands, of conversations the two of them had shared until he placed it.
"Yeah, you said she was acting secretive or something like that." He remembered, albeit vaguely.
"Right! You know I'm not one to gossip," She said, and Rafael had to fight the urge to roll his eyes at that comment. "But she's pregnant!"
Let the records show, Rafael had never met this said secretary before. The only things he knew about her were things that [Y/N] had disclosed to him, but evidently she had shared just enough with him for him to be all in on this revelation.
"No way," He tilted his head. "How do you know?"
"She told me!" She remarked. "I really couldn't believe it. I knew something was different about her. I had to come tell you when I could because you were the only person who agreed with me that something was up."
His heart fluttered again at that. It was purely just convenience that had brought her to his office that night, but it still made him shudder to think she had reserved a conversation solely for him.
"It seems we were right then," He took another sip, his eyebrows knitting together when he realized something. "Didn't you tell me she was single?"
There was a brief silence as she only shared a certain look with him. Her silence answered his question completely.
"Ah, so that's the crux of it all," He said, figuring he might as well fully emerge himself in this gossip session. "So, I'm guessing you have information on who the father is?"
"No," She shook her head. "I'm still working on that one...but I have a few guesses."
"Let's hear them." He encouraged her.
Normally, it would've been so unusual for Rafael to engage in this kind of talk. He didn't rightly care what a stranger to him had going on in their personal life...but he didn't like them the way he liked the detective sitting pretty in front of him, genuinely enjoying conversing with him on any given day.
"The rumor on the fifth floor is that it's a cop over in narcotics..." She took a quick glance over her shoulder to make sure no one was listening. "But that said cop has been gone for nearly six months. I don’t think the math adds up.”
Rafael considered her statement, nodding in agreement and urging her to continue.
"My other guess is a bit far-fetched, but not unreasonable," She said. "A few weeks ago she went home to Chicago to visit her family, and I remember her mentioning to me that she was thinking about paying an old flame of hers a visit..."
"Oh, that's interesting...and certainly a possibility, I suppose." He replied. "Is that all?"
"Yeah, that's all I got," She shrugged. "I am being unfair. I shouldn't be making a conversation out of her business."
Rafael chuckled, shaking his head.
"Well, we all indulge in a little nosy talk here and there." He said, feeling a pang of disappointment knowing this conversation was coming to an end.
“I know, I know. That’s really all I know," She reached for her coffee cup again. "But enough about me. How are things going here?”
He chuckled when she changed the subject, noticing her eyes lingering on his. He should've known she had something else locked and loaded.
"Things here are…as expected," he said, gesturing to the stacks of files on his desk. "Too many cases, too little time." He picked up his coffee, taking a sip before continuing. "But I always manage, one way or another."
“That you do, counselor.” She grinned. “This case has been a tough one…how are you holding up?”
He leaned back in his chair, a weary smile on his face.
"You know how it is." He said, and that was all he needed to say for her to completely understand.
"That I do," She sighed. "After all these years, I've never quite mastered dealing with everything we see."
"It's not easy, that's for sure," He said. "But I must say, you've handled yourself quite well in difficult situations, detective."
“I try my best,” She shrugged. “Some days I wonder if I should've stuck with my college job."
"Which was...?" He probed.
"Bartending," She confessed. "Also a stressful job, but nothing like doing police work."
This was new information to him. He actually didn't know that about her. He chuckled, imagining her in a bar apron, wiping down tables and listening to drunken rants.
"I could see that." He teased, a playful smile on his face. "But then we would be missing out on your skills as a detective."
She gave a small laugh, but didn't respond just yet. They sat in a comfortable silence, the conversation fizzling out before a new one blossomed.
"Maybe I need a vacation." She said in a way that seemed random, but this was usually how their conversations went. They would start on one topic and then end up somewhere completely different within minutes.
He took the opportunity to tease her, something that was also very common for their interactions.
"From SVU or from me?" He joked, the playful banter coming easy between them.
"Oh, never from you, Rafael." She matched his tone, his first name sliding off her tongue like it was something she said often.
He felt a brief flash of surprise when she used his first name, but he quickly recovered and played along with the banter.
"Careful, detective. That sounds almost affectionate." He teased.
She scoffed at that, an entertained smile on her face.
"We work for the law. We hardly have time to be affectionate in any regard." She said, and it was completely true.
"Yet here we are, two busy people making time for each other." He took a sip of his coffee, then looked at her with a more serious expression. "But you're right, it's not easy to balance work and personal life. Especially in our line of work."
“I can relate. Somehow you and my co-workers are the only people I really talk to,” She spoke, her voice soft. “Not…that I mind talking to you. Who else is going to tell you the neighborhood gossip?”
He smiled, genuinely flattered that she considered him one of her few friends.
"I must admit," he said, a hint of jest in his voice. "I do enjoy hearing your neighborhood gossip. It breaks up the monotony of the legal jargon."
“I imagine it does,” She returned a smile. “Maybe eventually we’ll figure out how to balance work and personal lives. Figure out how to do something other than work.”
Clearly they often toed the line between being professional, being casual, and being flirtatious. This was their norm. Everybody who knew them wouldn't even bat an eye at this conversation between them. But what Rafael said next would've raised a few brows. He wasn't sure what made him say it. Maybe it was the late hour or the moment just felt right, but he made a remark that couldn't have been confused as anything other than personal.
"Maybe we will. It's about time we started making time for ourselves." He paused, then said with a teasing smile. "And each other."
Her gaze fixed on him, her eyes slightly squinted as she smirked at him. She wasn't sure if he was being serious or not. Neither of them had ever crossed this line before. They were both aware that this was a new level of comfort with one another.
“Counselor, are you flirting with me?”
A sly smile tugged at the corner of his lips as he held her gaze.
"And if I was, detective?" He retorted.
“Mark me as surprised,” She said. “But flattered.”
They were both confident people...stubborn at times too. There would be no backing down from this. He chuckled, enjoying the back and forth banter. He leaned a bit closer in his chair, his smile growing wider.
"Is that so? You're not going to accuse me of being unprofessional?"
“That would make me a hypocrite. Me waltzing in here and gossiping about my coworker is unprofessional,” She leaned forward. “I consider this a flirtatious and pleasant conversation.”
He raised an eyebrow, intrigued by her words. He leaned closer as well, his voice a little lower now.
"Just a pleasant conversation, hm? You're not going to tell your other coworkers about this little chat?"
This situation was turning and it was turning fast. It had gone from casual to playful, and now they were trodding in a territory they had never ventured to before. This was different, but neither were backing down.
“Not at all, Counselor, if the thought of someone knowing bothers you so much.” She stood from her chair, eyes locked on him.
His smirk grew wider as she stood up, his eyes never leaving hers.
"It doesn't bother me at all." He assured her, rising to his feet as well. He moved around the desk, closing the distance between them. "In fact, I quite enjoy these little chats of ours."
“If we aren’t careful, we might become the precinct gossip.” She looked up at him, eyes sparkling.
He chuckled, finding the idea of being the source of gossip in the precinct strangely amusing. He took a step closer, his voice a low murmur as he spoke.
"And what if we are? Would that be such a bad thing?"
“Well, I would be getting a taste of my own medicine I suppose,” She said, realizing their noses were nearly touching. “Amongst other things.”
He let out a soft exhale, feeling his heart rate quicken at her close proximity. The air between them felt electrified.
"And those other things would be?" He asked, his voice barely above a whisper.
“Whatever you suggest we do to ‘make time for each other’?” She said smoothly. “What did you have in mind?”
He chuckled, his gaze locked with hers. He reached out with a slow, tentative hand, gently tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. The feel of her skin under his fingers sent a shiver down his spine.
"I have plenty of ideas," he said, his voice low and filled with promise, "but we should probably discuss them somewhere more… private."
“Are you thinking private thoughts, Counselor?” She replied.
He leaned in a little closer, his voice dropping to a sultry whisper.
"What do you think, detective?" His hand moved to her cheek, his thumb tracing a gentle line along her jawline. The proximity was intoxicating, and he couldn’t resist the urge to toy with her a bit more.
“I’m thinking a couple of drinks over dinner,” She said, her voice supple and sultry. “Dessert at my place.”
He chuckled, his eyes darkening with desire at her words. He lifted his other hand, gently cupping her face, his thumbs brushing against her cheeks. He leaned even closer, his lips grazing against her ear as he whispered.
"Sounds like a perfect plan."
“Don’t you want to know what you’ll be having for dessert?” She asked, her control getting close to wobbling.
His lips curled into a sinful smile, the double meaning behind her words and the shiver in her voice were all the invitation he needed. He moved even closer, his breath hot against her ear, his voice huskier than before.
"Show me, detective. I’m absolutely starving."
She smiled an awfully sultry grin, her teeth toying with her bottom lip as she whispered.
“You’re looking at it.”
His eyes darkened with a mixture of restraint and desire, a low growl rumbling in his chest. He was losing control, his hands gripping her face a bit tighter now.
"Careful, detective. If you keep talking like that, I'll have you right now on this desk."
Fire was burning between them. Their minds were racing and hearts were pounding with the knowledge of where this was going. Neither cared to try and figure out how this was happening so fast. Neither of them needed to. They just knew something between them was mutual and it was coming out in full force.
He backed her into the desk, the backs of her thighs pressed against the edge of the desk. Her hands came to start working on getting his tie off, his hands planted high on her thighs underneath her skirt. Her lips brushed against his as her breathing became heavy, the two of them mere milliseconds from going at it when there was a knock on his office door and it creaked open.
Both Rafael and the detective froze, the moment shattered by the intrusion. Rafael took a moment to compose himself, his face flushing with a mix of annoyance and embarrassment as he attempted to conceal the fact that they had been just seconds away from being intimate on his desk.
He cleared his throat and took a few steps back, allowing some space between them. They both were quick to readjust themselves, totally coming back to reality of what just almost happened. Her heart was hammering away in her chest, her cheeks tinted pink as she adjusted her skirt. The intruder was none other than her detective partner, Sonny Carisi, who was blissfully unaware that he was just barely seconds away from walking in on his partner and his squad's counselor going at it.
Sonny stepped into the office, his expression serious. However, he hadn’t yet noticed the tense atmosphere in the room or the telltale signs of intimacy that were still evident on Rafael and the detective’s faces. He approached Rafael, his eyes fixed on the district attorney.
"Counselor...we have an issue with one of the witnesses in the case. Can I have a word?"
She was trying to hold her composure, acting like she wasn’t just about to get down and dirty with the counselor. Rafael took a deep breath, attempting to compose himself. The interruption had cooled the heat between them a bit, but the tension in the room was still palpable. He cleared his throat and addressed Sonny, his voice slightly strained as he tried to keep it together.
"Yeah...w-what's the issue with the witness?"
She could hardly stand to be in the room anymore. She was having a hard time processing how an innocent conversation turned so hot so quickly. Rafael had never expressed that kind of feeling with her. They had never gotten that close before. Sure, they faintly flirted, but never so outright before. She was overwhelmed, and now she felt like she needed some air.
“Sonny, you finish up here,” She said, her voice a bit shaky from the adrenaline. “I’m…I’ll meet you downstairs.”
Sonny's eyes flicked between Barba and the detective, sensing that there was more going on than he was aware of. He was puzzled by her shaky voice, and something about the tension in the room felt odd, but he didn’t have time to question it. As the detective made her way out of the room, Rafael's gaze followed her, a mixture of disappointment and concern etched on his face as she left.
Rafael had never shared that kind of moment with her. To be honest, he wasn’t sure where it had come from. Sure, he liked her and favored her, but he had never made a move on her before. But in all fairness, she had never reciprocated quite like that.
Rafael couldn’t deny that the moment with her had been explosive, a spark igniting between them that he hadn’t expected. He had always liked her, but this was a whole different level of attraction. Her response to him had triggered a deep, intense desire that he couldn’t ignore. As Sonny continued to talk, Rafael struggled to focus on the conversation, his mind going back to the moment they had shared just moments before.
He just wanted to help Sonny and get him out of his office so he could handle this. But of course, Sonny always needed to know everything.
“Is…everything alright between you and her, Counselor?”
Rafael flinched, snapped out of his thoughts by Sonny's question. He blinked a couple of times and cleared his throat, trying to hide his preoccupation.
"Yeah, everything's just fine, Carisi," he said, his tone a little guarded. "Why do you ask?"
“I’ve never seen her run out like that. Especially when you’re around,” Sonny remarked.
Rafael shifted uneasily in his chair as he sat down, the observation not being lost on him. He tried to play it off as nonchalantly as possible.
"I suppose she just had something to take care of. She seemed… in a hurry." He said, his words sounding unconvincing even to him.
Sonny didn’t believe him. He knew his partner, and he could tell when someone was lying. Something had happened in this office before he came in.
Rafael realized that Sonny wasn’t buying his response, and he silently cursed himself for not being more convincing. The air in the room felt heavy, and he knew he had to change the subject or risk further questioning.
"Is there anything else you needed to discuss regarding the case, Detective Carisi?" Rafael asked, trying to sound as impassive as possible.
Sonny caught the way Rafael changed the subject. He wasn’t getting anything from Rafael, so he decided to try his partner, who was downstairs waiting for him.
“No...alright…” Sonny said. “We’ll…we’ll be in touch.”
Rafael nodded, a slight look of relief on his face as Sonny seemed to accept the change in topic. As Sonny turned to leave, Rafael couldn’t help but feel a pang of worry about what might happen once he spoke to the detective.
He took a deep breath, trying to gather his thoughts, but his mind was still buzzing from the encounter that had just taken place, and the uncertainty of what would happen next gnawed at him. Sonny wasted no time getting to the elevator, taking it to the ground floor. Sure enough, she was standing just outside on the sidewalk, her hand resting over her chest as she took slow deep breaths of the cold New York air.
She let the cold air of New York City fill her lungs, the chill helping to clear her mind. She tried to steady her rapid heartbeat, still shaken by the intensity of the moment she and Rafael had shared. The thought of what might have happened if Sonny hadn’t walked in sent a shudder down her spine. What was she thinking?
She was so distracted by her thoughts that she didn’t notice Sonny approaching until he was standing beside her.
“Sonny.” She nearly gasped, her heart lurching in surprise.
Sonny chuckled at her reaction and raised an eyebrow, a sly smile on his face.
"Whoa, easy there. You almost jumped out of your skin." he teased, trying to lighten the mood.
“I’m sorry, you scared me.” She sighed. “Are you ready to go?” She gestured toward the SVU car they had taken.
Sonny nodded, and as they headed toward the car, he shot her a sideways glance, curious about what had just transpired upstairs.
He wasn’t a detective for nothing, and he could sense that there was more to the story. Something was off, especially given her demeanor and the flushed look on her face.
She slid into the passenger seat, feeling a bit less shaky now that she had a few minutes to calm down. Her mind was still reeling, but she didn’t feel like she was going to pass out anymore.
Sonny walked around the car and got behind the wheel, his gaze flickering to her every now and then. As they started driving, he decided to go for it and ask the question that had been on his mind since he walked in on his partner and the Counselor.
"So, what was that all about? You left his office looking like you’d seen a ghost." He said.
She took a subtle deep breath, trying to center herself for a round of questioning that was no doubt coming.
“It was nothing really,” She responded as coolly as possible. “I’m just tired, I think. I just needed a second to gather myself.”
Sonny gave her a skeptical look, her response only adding to his suspicion. She was obviously trying to brush it off, but he was not convinced.
"Come on. You know I wasn’t born yesterday," he said, his tone laced with mild irritation. "Something happened up there."
“I don’t know what you’re talking about…” She said, reaching for her phone that vibrated in her pocket.
As she checked her phone, Sonny gave her a knowing look. He could sense that she was dodging the question, and it only fueled his suspicion further.
"Oh, really? Then why won’t you look me in the eye?" he asked, his voice a bit challenging now. "Who’s sending you text messages, huh? The Counselor?”
Her heart dropped, because despite the fact that Sonny’s question was a joke — he was right. She stared at the text message that had just come in from Rafael.
A sly smile crept onto Sonny's face as he spotted the change in her expression, a clear indication that he hit a sore spot.
"Bingo," he said, his tone dripping with smugness. "That’s what I thought. What did he say?"
Sonny glanced at her, his curiosity piqued. He could tell she was reading a text message, but he couldn’t see what it said.
"So, are you planning to share that text with me, or are you just going to keep me in suspense?" he said, his voice filled with playful annoyance.
She didn't even really mean to, but she read the text out loud for herself and Sonny to hear.
Call me when you can. Please.
Sonny raised an eyebrow, a smirk spreading across his face. He couldn’t help but feel a little amused by the situation.
"‘Please?’" he repeated, a hint of mockery in his voice. "Sounds like the counselor is desperate to talk to you."
Sonny had her cornered, and she knew it. There was no getting anything past Sonny, especially since they worked so closely every single day.
“Sonny..." She whined, knowing he was more on to her than she realized.
Sonny chuckled at her response, thoroughly enjoying the teasing. He knew he had her now.
"Come on," he said, feigning innocence. "Don’t sound so surprised. I’ve seen the way you two look at each other when you think no one’s watching."
“Now I really don’t know what you’re talking about,” She huffed. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
Sonny took his eyes off the road for a moment to shoot her a sidelong glance, a knowing smile on his lips.
"Oh, please. You really think you’re discreet?" he said. "The tension between you two is so thick, a blind man could see it."
She rubbed her eyes stressfully, unsure of how to respond to Sonny, and even more unsure of how to proceed with Rafael. Seeing her stressed out, Sonny’s playful tone softened slightly. While he enjoyed teasing her, he could see that the situation was weighing on her.
"Hey, relax," he said, throwing her a gentle smile. "It’s just me, alright? You can talk to me, you know?"
“No, I can’t…” She sighed. “Not about this.”
Sonny’s smile faded slightly at her response. He could tell that whatever had happened in Rafael’s office was more serious than he initially thought. It wasn’t just some harmless flirtation between her and the district attorney. He cleared his throat and spoke with a more serious tone now.
"Why not? Come on. You and I have been friends for a long time, haven’t we? You can trust me."
“I trust you,” She said. “It’s not that, it’s just…complicated.”
Sonny furrowed his brow, his interest piqued even further. The way she said ‘complicated’ made it clear that there was more to this than he initially thought. He knew there was something she was holding back, but he wasn’t going to let it go that easily.
"Complicated, huh? In what way?" he asked, his voice calm but filled with genuine curiosity.
At this point, she knew Sonny wasn’t going to let this go. Sonny could keep a secret better than anyone, so she figured she might as well give it up. She told him the story, leaving out a few graphic details, but she told him enough for him to get the picture.
Sonny listened intently as she spoke, his expression stoic as he absorbed the details of what had transpired between her and Rafael. He didn’t say a word as she recounted the encounter, his gaze steady on the road ahead of them.
When she finished her story, he was silent for a moment, considering everything that had been said. Then, he spoke up, keeping his voice neutral.
"So, let me get this straight. You and the Counselor got hot and heavy in his office, but things got interrupted, and now you don’t know what to do next?"
“That about sums it up,” She sighed again. “If we had gone all the way…I don’t even know. I don’t know where to go from here and I don’t know if I can ever work with him again…”
Sonny exhaled softly, his jaw tensing slightly. He hadn’t been expecting it to be that serious. He could sense the internal struggle she was having and understood her confusion. He knew it wasn’t easy, juggling personal feelings and professional responsibilities.
"Whoa, whoa. Hold on," he said, trying to get a grip on the situation. "First of all, it didn’t go that far. Nothing…happened, right?"
“It was close,” She admitted. “But no. Sonny, Olivia will kill me if she finds out. She would flip if she found out I got cozy with the counselor…”
Sonny nodded slowly, processing her words. The fact that she was worried about Olivia’s reaction spoke volumes about how seriously she was taking this. He respected her devotion to the job, and he knew how highly her superiors thought of her.
"Okay, first of all, Olivia’s not going to ‘kill’ you. Besides, this isn’t exactly the first time a relationship has happened between coworkers."
“Yeah, but it’s different. It’s…me. You know how she is with me. I’m the youngest on the squad,” She took a deep breath. “If she knew Rafael made a move on me…”
Sonny could see the weight of the situation pressing heavily on her. He understood her concerns.
"I get that you don’t want to disappoint her," he said in a reassuring tone. "The thing is, this whole thing with Barba…you didn’t exactly pursue him, right? He’s the one who made a move. And as far as I can tell, it sounds like it was completely out of the blue for you."
“It…wasn’t really out of the blue,” She confessed. “I mean, I didn’t go in there expecting what happened but…like you said we’re pretty…flirtatious. And I didn’t push him away.”
Sonny chuckled slightly at her confirmation that she hadn’t exactly shut down whatever had been going on between her and the Counselor. He knew they’d had a spark.
“So, let me get this straight: you and Barba have been flirty with each other for a while, and eventually, things got heated in his office. Is that about right?”
Sonny nodded when she confirmed it, the situation starting to make more sense to him now.
"And now you don’t know what to do because you’re worried about your job, your relationship with Olivia, and whatever might happen next with Barba?”
“Right,” She replied. “It happened so fast…I don’t know how I got here.”
Sonny chuckled softly as he listened to her concerns.
"You got here, because you and Barba have chemistry," he said bluntly. "The question is, what are you going to do about it?"
“I don’t know what to do about it,” She read the text from Barba again. “How do you even move forward from something like this?”
Sonny shot her a sympathetic glance, understanding her anxiety.
"Hey, it sounds like you’re feeling a bit out of your comfort zone here, and that’s alright." He said reassuringly. "You’re usually more reserved, and this situation’s a bit more intense than you’re used to. But that’s not necessarily a bad thing. It could mean that something about Barba really does it for you."
“Yeah, I could’ve told you that. I guess I need to respond,” She stared at her phone. "He wants me to call him later. So he will probably reject me and tell me it was a mistake and it never should’ve happened and then things will be awkward and then I’ll have to leave SVU and then I’m back to making traffic stops-“
Sonny reached over and grabbed her arm firmly, stopping her mid-rant. He chuckled slightly at her panicked ramblings.
"Slow down there," he said, a hint of amusement in his voice. "Take a deep breath. You're getting way ahead of yourself."
“Maybe…” A smile appeared on her face without realizing it. “I’ll just…tell him I’ll call him when I can.”
Sonny chuckled along with her, enjoying the lighter tone of the conversation. He was glad to see that his teasing had lifted her spirits, at least a little bit.
"Hey, you never know," He said with a shrug and a smirk. "Stranger things have happened. Maybe Barba’s completely smitten with you and can’t wait to see you again."
“Alright, alright…” She replied. “One step at a time. Let’s finish this workday.”
Sonny chuckled at her response, sensing her determination to get through the last couple hours of their long workday and not let the situation with Barba consume her. He nodded in agreement.
"You got it," he said, his tone back to business. "I've got your back, no matter what happens next."
___
They returned to the precinct, tying up their loose ends for the day so they could get the day finished. She tried to put Rafael in the back of her mind. She just needed to get through her shift and then go from there. She hoped she would feel better once she and Rafael talked, no matter what the outcome was.
Sonny shot a few glances at her, sensing her attempt to keep her mind off the situation with the Counselor. He knew she was struggling to focus on work when her mind was preoccupied.
As the day came to an end, Sonny casually looked down at his watch and spoke up.
"You know, we're just about done for the day. You…uh…have plans for the rest of the night?"
She gave him a look.
“I’m going to call him as soon as I leave,” She said. “If he’s still at his office, I might swing by.”
Sonny gave her a reassuring pat on the shoulder, his eyes filled with genuine concern.
"You're gonna handle this, one way or another." he said, his voice firm and steady.
“Okay,” She nodded. “I’ll text you when it’s over.”
Sonny waved her goodbye, and she didn't waste any time getting out of the precinct. She dialed Rafael's number on the way out of the building.
The phone rang a few times before the familiar voice of Rafael Barba answered on the other end.
“Hey.” His tone was calm and composed.
“Counselor.” She greeted as calmly as she could.
There was a hint of surprise and relief in Rafael's voice as he recognized her on the other end of the line. He had been hoping she would call.
"I wasn’t sure if you’d call." He said plainly.
“Of course I did,” She let out a silent sigh. “Are you…still at your office?”
There was a slight pause before Rafael responded, the anticipation heavy in his voice.
"Yes," he replied. "Do you…want to come by?"
Her heart fluttered, there really was no turning back.
“Yeah, I figured I would come by so…we could talk. I can be there in 20 minutes…”
They sorted out the details before the call ended, and she knew this was going to either be a pleasant or brutal talk. She knew she might be losing one of her best friends by the end of the night. She had never felt more unsure, but she couldn't even deny that maybe she was curious to see how this developed...if it developed at all.
Her mind raced as she made her way to Rafael's office. She thought of every possible outcome in this scenario...the best case, the worst case, and everything in between. She felt the knot of anxiety in her stomach getting heavier by the minute. She laid eyes on her destination and knew it was now or ever. She needed to compose herself and pull it together. She wanted to walk out of this situation with him still an important part of her life.
The building was closed down for the night, all the offices dark and closed...except for his. It was now or never. If there was ever a moment where she felt like she was about to seal her fate...it was right now.
She took the elevator to the floor of his office, her brain actively controlling her breathing to be as calm and slow as possible. Her heart was pounding away, and she wasn't sure if it was the nerves or the knowledge of seeing him again after what had happened.
His office door was closed, but a glow of light was shining from behind the closed blinds on his windows and under the door. She gave a light knock on the door, a slow exhale escaping her as she waited for him to answer.
She heard some shuffling from behind the door, knowing he was undoubtedly trying to quickly straighten up his desk before he allowed her inside. A few seconds passed before he opened the door -- his tired eyes meeting hers with the same look of anxiety and curiosity of what was about to happen. There was no turning back now, and they both felt like they were prepared.
But little did they know, their night was about to get far more interesting than they planned for.
—
Part 2 !