I hope my ask doesn't look weird but I was wondering what are your thoughts on Simmons in a relationship with an unexperienced person (maybe even shy or nervous), basically just like him? I don't mean sexual aspect specifically, but who do you think will be more dominant and take more initiative overall, when both of them are completely new to this relathionship thing?
I think that Simmons will be more happy to be in a position of a "leader" in a relationship to some degree, but he will just take too much time to get comfortable with this role? I also can feel that he is somewhat impulsive, so maybe like, when he is hesitant about confessing his feelings to somebody, there can be a brief sudden moment when he feels like "fuck it we ball" and just confess straight away without thinking about the consequences, because his brain's already did too much damage with all the indecisiveness or anxiety before hand.
Hi! Thank you so much for sending this in! I read it and was like 'I need to pull out my laptop for this one because we are gonna get in DEPTH with this'. Which is never a bad thing. I'll throw it all under the cut!
I'll start off with the fact that while Simmons is not very experienced in relationships with other people, much less those of the female variety, he's an imagination of what he probably wants from that relationship. Of course imaginations aren't always up to par with what reality is but I think he might find it a little easier with someone who has been in a relationship before just because there's a base of reference there.
Now, considering you're asking how he'd feel with someone who's just as new to dating and stuff as him, he can't complain there either. It's a little harder because he has no idea what he's doing and the only two people close enough to give him advice are terrible advice givers. Never go to Grif for dating advice. Or Sarge. He can pull through on having some good romantic ideas and stuff but it takes a lot of trying and testing between you both to find the right kind of rhythm for what fits cohesively with you both as a couple. Relationships are a lot of work and not every relationship is so cut and dry easy to fit into. People are vastly different creatures based on experiences and life paths alone.
If you're female or female identifying it will take A WHILE. But it's not always gonna be that awkward. Simmons can acclimate to being around women if he's exposed long enough. If you're nonbinary or male presenting/male, he'll relax easier. He's definitely a little fruity so I don't think gender matters much to him. But he still has problems with women regardless. (WE HAVE SEEN HE CAN GET OVER IT THOUGH YOU HAVE HOPE.)
Now. Relationships are built on mutual trust and all that jazz. If you wanna let him take the reins I think he would appreciate that but there are gonna be things you gotta do together or you're gonna have to take the lead on yourself. He's a smart cookie so you could probably take the lead on a lot of stuff but it's probably not the best idea to overdo it. Authority can and will go to his head. Your relationship would suffer from it. Dating is not the same as the military where authority is the end all be all of what happens. You're gonna have to set your foot down if things start to get like that with Simmons. Impulsivity comes from his confidence in himself too so the more he's feeling like a big top dog and trusting in himself then he's more likely to go 'fuck it we ball'.
Of course when he confesses to you it's definitely a 'fuck it we ball' moment because he's just... built like that. I love this man but he overthinks too much sometimes so if he's planning this out he will second guess himself a lot. It might take some pushing for him to admit that he loves you (and he's gonna groan about it later cause he wanted it to be at least a little romantic) but he can't hide those feelings forever. It helps if you encourage him into that openness. Gives it more opportunity to come from an unrushed place rather than stress making him word vomit it all out.
In conclusion- Be patient. Be supportive if he's trying to speak. He's got some word backup in him but if he feels like you're a safe person to be honest with who won't mock him for his honesty it helps in spades. But don't try to put him in charge of your relationship. It's not a relationship if you two are working together.
