A recent trip to Boston/Cambridge has helped clarify that many – if not all – of my fondest memories of living there are tied to specific restaurants and bars. In the interest of the internet, I’ve decided to compile a list of these special places so that others may come to realize the hard truth that happiness is about 10% emotional fulfillment and 90% food.
Life Alive Why: It's hard to think of something bad to say about a place called Life Alive. It's almost the same as someone not liking this video. Also this place sells that really great sea salt dark chocolate, and the bottom floor has color-coordinator seating areas. Why not: An occasional little Buddha figure in a restaurant is fine, but this place is like Starbucks for Hare Krishnas. There are inspirational phrases about life and love and the universe posted in the bathroom, which strikes an odd cord alongside the "Employees must wash hands" sign. What to order: The Goddess in a bowl or a wrap, maybe with squash or avocado.
Spike’s Junkyard Dogs Why: Okay picture this. It’s hot outside, and you’re in a really bad mood and all you want to do is sink your teeth into something that you can hold with both hands while chasing down the 66 bus that you always miss. Spike’s is the place for you. Why not: Spike’s is a cash-only establishment, and you also run the risk of walking in on a hotdog eating contest. What to order: The veggie dog with onions, yellow mustard, and red relish.
My Thai Vegan Cafe (hint: it's not a cafe) Why: Other than the food, the best thing about My Thai is the truly gigantic women's restroom that you could basically do zumba in. Everything on the menu is pretty much great, and if you don't eat meat, it's like you're eating meat. Why not: You'll have a birds-eye view of Boston's stipper district, which in truth only consists of two strip clubs. To get to the restaurant you have to go up the kind of staircase that makes you wonder what's going to happen to you when you get to the top. Also the staff thinks that limes are lemons and lemons are limes. Also Shuffles (inside joke sry). What to order: Order this entire meal and you will not be disappointed; fried spring rolls to start, then a non-spicy #78, then a piece of vegan carrot cake. If you try to eat the carrot cake by yourself, you'll have to be rolled home.
Piattini Wine Cafe Why: Both the location and decor are adorable, and about 3/4 of the staff speak in heavy Italian accents and will flirt with you. Why not: It's all about the benjamins. What to order: The Ravioli di Zucca Gialla. Then the Tortellini. Then the Creme Brulée. Regrets can wait until you're on the Green Line.
The Friendly Toast Why: Mixed drinks named after Hitchcock movies and a design scheme that's like Applebee's if there was an Applebee's on Saturn. Why not: Super long wait for Sunday brunch. And then to get to the restroom you have to go down this industrial staircase and through secret doors, so there's really no telling where you'll end up. Also hipsters. What to order: The Guy Scramble. Then maybe a milkshake. Then maybe five cocktails.
Falafel King Why: This falafel is seriously ridiculous. They also give you a free sample (or three!) while you "make up your mind," even though you know exactly what you're going to get as soon as you arrive. And the free samples are dipped in hummus. Why not: Falafel King is located in a pretty sketchy mini mall in Downtown Crossing. And actually I wouldn't even call it a mini mall, but a compressed strip mall food court that you might find on the way to Cleveland. What to order: Uh, falafel.
Bagel Rising Why: There are always really cute dogs waiting outside - the only problem is that the place is so small that the owners will definitely see you petting them. The menu is all-diet friendly, I think. Why not: The screeching wail of the Green Line sort of ruins the mood. And Bagel Rising also closes super early in the day, so you end up making your way there and almost run you're so excited, but then it turns out you have to settle for the In House Cafe. Which isn't that bad, actually, and the seating's really nice. But still. What to order: The Chia Bagel and a large iced coffee.
Grasshopper Why: This place is kind of a local legend. It's the kind of place that people trek to in howling wind and snow for the $10 all-you-can-eat Sunday buffets. And by people I mean me. Why not: It's either so crowded you feel like tearing your hair out, or you're COMPLETELY ALONE. Also no alcohol, but the staff are pretty cool about letting you sneak in a 40 from next door. What to order: The No Name. You might not know what it is, but they do.
Courtside Karaoke Why: You will not find a divier bar than Courtside. I'm sure Mark the Shark (the track-suit-wearing "bouncer" who has a repertoire of exactly three karaoke songs) will be there long after we have all left this earth. If you're really lucky, you'll get the DJ who's actually a middle school science teacher and knows all "They Might be Giants" songs. Why not: You'll need to load up on your immunizations beforehand. And there's this one really grumpy waitress, and then one waitress who doesn't speak any English. Beware of bachelorette parties. And if you're looking for a comprehensive karaoke list, you'll be sorely disappointed, though they do have a whole section of Jewish ritual songs. What to order: Mozzarella sticks and a pitcher of PBR.
Doyle's Cafe (hint: also not a cafe) Why: There is no better bar to go to if you want to pretend that you're in a Clint Eastwood movie (you know, his Boston ones). Why not: Baseball baseball all the time. What to order: Any pizza, they're all great. Sweet potato fries, even you don't like sweet potato fries.
Any I've missed?
