tw ed
i think my dad knows about my ed ? oh well ,, everytime he offers me food i either say yes take a few bites ,, say no and dont eat, or say yes and bring the food to my room.
and recently when ive been saying no to food hes been like "well𓈒𓈒 make sure u eat something𓈒" and last night i went to bring dinner upstairs and he was like
"no eat down here" and hewas looking at me consistently. like oh my god if he makes me gain weight i may just kill my self
im only less than 10lbs frm my gw and its like everyone has been like oh ur so pretty u dont need to lose weight
and then i js gotta stare at them bc i hate every inch of my current being ,, fuck losing weight i wanna change who i am i dont want people to recognize me anymore
but no matter how hard i try ,, i dye my hair ,, get piercings, tattoos, i lose weight, change my style but i still fucking hate my self ugh.
