Tags/Warnings: SFW Pairing: N/A ; Ted and Joon / Implied Comic Trips Status: Completed
Disclaimer:
I only own my own original characters. I also want to acknowledge that any other canon and/or original characters that appear in these drabbles are my interpretation of how they would behave, so they may not be accurate to the creator’s writings. Any original characters belong entirely to their creators.
Summary: Joon discovers the dangers of having family marry into the Joneses.
Joon wasn’t normally one for big parties, but she did have to admit, this one was a good one. Maybe it was the open bar. Or the food that didn’t suck. Or the fact that people had finally learned not to bother her with simple small talk and went to the Joneses or Mason instead. Hell, it might have even been a combination of all three. Taking a sip from her glass, she glanced around the large group and silently agreed with herself. Yes, this wasn’t a bad party at all. Not like she would have been able to get out of it. Not showing up to your own son’s wedding probably would have been a bad thing. No, not probably. Definitely.
She had lucked out that the other three parents had taken over most of the schmoozing of guests. Mason had been short, but polite with his answers. Emma went between gushing about the whole thing to happy tears so many times that Joon was secretly wondering if she was being hormonal or not. And Ted…well, truthfully, she hadn’t seen much of Ted. Sure at the wedding he had been right there, front and center with the clumsy leading the clumsy down the aisle, but ever since then he had seemed scarce. She frowned. That couldn’t be right. He was the schmuck who was all about fairytale romances. How the hell could he sneak out of all the “rainbows and unicorn” feelings happening now?
After a quick pit stop to pick up an appetizer–thank God the bride and groom were food people–she made her way across the floor to try and track down the missing gentle giant. He was pretty easy to find. Not only because he seemed to tower over every other person, but he was also on Kadi duty, and she was determined to talk everyone’s ear off. Luckily for Joon, Kadi had decided to ramble on to some poor fellow that had made the mistake of standing nearby, so she was able to quickly sneak into the seat next to Ted.
“Hey,” she announced, butting him with her shoulder. Ted smiled back at her, but gave no answer. Weird. “Why aren’t you out there with all the other terrible dancers?”
This time Ted chuckled and pointed at his youngest. “Someone decided she’s only going out there if they play the cha cha slide, so I’m in a holding position.”
“Fair enough.” But Joon wasn’t going to let that slide. “Still, you should be out being a happy, proud dad and all that jazz. Telling embarrassing stories and making everyone question how much sparkling cider you’ve had.”
“No offense, but I’m not seeing you do that either.”
“Easy answer, I’m the mom, not the dad. My job is to swoon.” Joon said it with an absolute straight face, causing Ted to laugh again. “Seriously though. You are happy, right?”
“Of course!” Ted looked a little shocked by the question, but seemed to see that she wasn’t coming from a malicious place. “I am happy. Really. For both of them. And…” A thumb jutted out towards Emma, who was bursting at the seams with joy again. “A little bit for her too.”
“Then why do you seem so down?”
Sighing, Ted glanced over to make sure Kadi was still distracted before leaning closer to Joon. “Promise not to tell anyone?”
“No, but I want to hear it anyway.”
Ted shook his head, closing his eyes for a second before speaking. “...I’m trying to figure out which is the better name.”
Joon blinked a few times. “What?”
“I can’t decide which is better and it’s driving me bananas.”
She wanted to smack him. “You mean to tell me…you’ve been over here looking down in the dumps…because you can’t think of a good name?”
“Oh no, I have a good name. Jennifer Jones is a solid name.”
Joon rolled her eyes. She couldn’t believe she had actually been concerned about him just a few minutes ago. She thought he was having some emotional struggle about his daughter being grown up now or some bullshit and instead this is what he was doing. She could throttle him if it wasn’t for the fact that he was completely wrong.
“Jennifer Miller would be a solid one too,” she countered.
“Yes, but think about…Gordon Jones.” He half shrugged. “He’s already an honorary one. Would fit right in. Plus, it would continue the streak of being the Joneses.”
“You’re ridiculous.”
“You mean we’re ridiculous.”
“What?”
“You’re one of us now, Joon.”
For the first time in decades, fear struck the heart of Joon. “No.”
“Oh yeah. One of us. One of us.” Ted began the chant, softly tapping his fists on the table in beat with his words. Soon Kadi joined in and the duo chanted in sync.
“You can’t make me.”
“Too late, Joon Jones.” Ted shook his head at that. “That’ll take some getting used to.”
“Absolutely not.”
“Nope. It’s happening. You are a Jones now.”
“They can still choose Miller.”
“Yeah, but I’m not being Ted Miller. Give me a break.” Ted scoffed, as if it was the most insulting thing he had heard.
Joon had to think fast. “Jennifer Cellist!”
Ted stopped the tapping and looked at Kadi. She seemed to think it over before giving a small nod. “It does have a certain appeal,” Ted agreed, looking over at Joon. “But! It would also require Gordon to go by it too.”
“Oh, I can make him.” Anything to get out of being a Jones.
“Hmm…” Ted seemed to think about it for a moment. “Ted Cellist wouldn’t be terrible. It does have a nice ring to it.”
“What has a nice ring?” Emma asked, scooping Kadi up as she sat down in the seat.
“Our new last name. We’re Cellists now. I have to fight Mason for Joon’s hand and claim our true family title.”
“Well, good luck with that, honey. What would you like your tombstone to say?”
“‘He went out as he came in, crying and afraid of bald men.’” The Joneses shared a laugh as Mason came over to take a seat next to Joon.
“What are they on about?” he asked
“Trust me when I say you don’t want to know.”
“Mason Jones!” Ted said, looking over at the couple before shaking his head. “No, that sounds too medieval.”
Mason looked back at Joon who just shook her head. “Don’t acknowledge him. It only makes him stronger.”
The discussion went out between the Joneses–and unfortunately for Joon, between the Joneses and Mason–for the next three minutes before she was cursed by the presence of the happy couple themselves. The blushing bride excitedly hugged everyone at the table before taking a seat next to her sister, snagging a two carrots off her plate, silently handing one up towards her glowing groom. "What are we talking about?" she asked, glancing between her family.
"Your last name," Emma said, getting straight to the point.
Jenny simply blinked while her father elaborated. "We're trying to figure out which is the best last name. I voted Jones--I'm biased--Mason likes Miller, and Joon likes Cellist." He held his hands out. "Discuss."
"Huh." Was all Jenny said at first. She smiled up at Gordon, the couple sharing a quiet laugh with one another. "I guess we didn't really think about that."
"We could always combine names," Gordon suggested. Jenny scooped Kadi up into her lap so he could take a seat, his fingers drumming against the table as he thought. "Let's see. We'd have...Mones."
"Absolutely not," nearly everyone at the table replied. The couple laughed. Jenny tilted her head, chewing on her lip as she said, "I don't think Jiller works either."
Jenny and Gordon continued laughing at each other's suggestions, which ranged from Celler to Jollist to Conller, each one earning a new laugh from each other and an exhausted head shake from Joon. "You know," Gordon said, offering the Jones girls another vegetable from Kadi's plate as he popped on in his own mouth. "We could always just pick a new name. Break tradition and start our own."
"And what would you choose?" his new wife asked, leaning into him now that Kadi had hopped down to get her father's attention.
"Oh, easy. Gordon Skywalker."
"Jennifer Skywalker wouldn't be too bad. I think they might question the legal documents though." Jenny laughed along with him. Joon watched as they seemed to get lost in each other, Jenny's nose scrunching up as she giggled while Gordon's fingers mindlessly fiddled with the new band on her left hand. She felt a small smile of her own start to tug at the corners of her mouth, until Jenny sat up straight, smacking Gordon in the chest as she exclaimed, "Oh! What about Razzmatazz? It's weird enough for people to ask question, but not potentially licensed by a production company!" She looked around the table. "Is it too late for us to be re-announced as Mr. and Mrs. Razzmatazz?" The cute moment was over.
“Excuse me,” Joon snapped, reaching over to a passing waiter. “Could you bring another bottle of champagne. And just…keep them coming.”
“Um…for how long?” The waiter nervously asked.
Joon looked around the table, stealing glances at each new and old member of the family she had chosen to be a part of. “...Let’s say the next forty years?”