#eldenringverse

[albertkensington]

"What is it that you shan't say, Albert?"

"Nay... ti's ungentlemanly. I cannot.."

[albertkensington]

The strange Tarnished yanks Albert by the ear, pulling him down to her level. "Unless you want to be squished by my fiance, I'd suggest you not make awkward comments at him like that... He's a bit... Reclusive, self aware, and shy."

"Ow, ow, owowowow--excuse me??!"

Albert didn't register much of what the Tarnished said, given that most of his attention was diverted to his sore ear.

"Fiancée?? Who's Fiancée have I offen-- who even ARE you? Let go, let go at once!!"

[albertkensington]

When the guy you start working for gives you the UGLIEST dress you've ever worn but the fact he got decked out in gold and nice silks got you like 😳

[albertkensington]

"Wait, how many fellows are there with 'god' in their names now? I'm struggling to keep up with whatever the blue blazes the Shattering was and now I've got all these bourgeoisie freaks to keep track of??"

[albertkensington]

YOU. didja get a girlfriend yet? boyfriend? cute boyfriend?

A sigh passes his lips.

"Nay... I remain utterly maidenless. And boyless. And shrimpless, still! There was a nice decrepit noble that didn't immediately attempt to attack me, but I don't think he was into me."

[albertkensington]

"No one told me the Roundtable Hold has a doggy! I love dogs! Goodness me, I really ought to go see what it's all about up there, then!"

[albertkensington]

Haha pee pee boy

Based on this vid

Marigold belongs to @stormveilsurgeons

[albertkensington]

@fabulastronaut

"F-fuck me, it's cold...!"

It seemed like a perfectly safe, sequestered spot at the time, Albert thought. A once proud keep had now been swarmed with soldiers and beasts haphazardly strewn across Stormveil Castle.

The Sorcerer naturally assumed this was a product of a dilapidated place, no ruler to call it home, surely. That being said, Albert had spent most of his days roughing it in the confines of a cottage in Leyendell until recently, so one could confidently conclude the boy was hardly up to date with current affairs.

Albert had graciously draped himself in a blanket he found in what thought of as a spare bedroom. A woefully large blanket, mind you, fit to function as a giant's loincloth! Who could have possibly slept in such a grand bed?

With his new, extremely comfy find, the astrologer tottered down the halls until finding a comfy little crevice in the castle where he may call shelter for the night.

A telltale sign of his precense, however, was the end corner of comfy bed cover poking out into the hallway. Not like any soul would notice, surely...?