Things I have learned from making out with a friend
I mentioned in my previous blog that I indeed made out with a friend in our group. It was not supposed to happen (most people would say that) but I guess casual events like that have the right to exist.
Here are few things I have learned from that experience that surely strengthened me:
1. When our tongues were playing and lips were not touching, I began realizing that kisses with lips involved are only for the ones with feelings and filled hearts, so when I kissed my ex with lips involved but was dying to just taste his tongue, I knew I did not love him, but I just wanted someone to make out with.
2. When he immediately cupped my boob with his hand, I realized that I was not that sensitive at all--that I could never be back to the conservative me. I know it will disappoint many people who support me or love me, but maybe that is just what I want for myself now.
3. When I told him a secret I used to tell me ex about, and he just said “You can survive that,” I knew I was right on telling him and my ex about it because they both did not really care at all, making me more in touch with the independence I have always carried along with me.
4. I could be disappointed with so many things about a guy,and I thought I lost that the moment I tried to accept the flaws of my ex who I really regret a bit adjusting for. This friend had lots of issues and drama.
5. I realized that I indeed really hate drama--that I am selfish and so allergic to bullshit.
6. I can never be physically pleased by a guy (well not that much) but I like it better when it’s just all playing in my head, the scenarios I can do with the guy. I have no fucking feelings.
