The Greek gods and how willing they are to fuck Odysseus (at least according to me)
Not doing all of them, there’s so many
Zeus: He most def would, but not because Ody is special. Like, it’s Zeus, the man would fuck anything as long as it’s breathing. I do think he’d enjoy the pleasure of messing with his older brother though, so he’s extra into it for that
Poseidon: Oh yes. He’d deny it if asked, but he wants to fuck him so badly
Hades: I think he’d fuck him mainly to see what all the hype is about. And to mess with Poseidon of course
Hera: Nah, she’s surprisingly loyal. Which like bitch why
Hestia: Asexual queen
Demeter: She has no idea who Odysseus is tbh. Don’t think she’d be too into it anyways
Apollo: Yeah! That’s not a good thing for Ody tho, as it never ends well for Apollo’s mortal lovers. Mans might be in danger
Artemis: Asexual lesbian queen
Athena: See with her, I don’t know. Their bond is strictly platonic, but I don’t think they’d be against the idea of fucking each other. I do think she’d make him fight for it
Ares: Now for most of the duration of the musical, no I do not think he’d be interested. But after he repeatedly stabs Poseidon with a trident? Oh boy
Aphrodite: Yeah, he’s just her type! Tough warrior that’s secretly a sub :)
Hermes: Mans been willing to fuck him for a long ass time, like I’m impressed by his level of self restraint actually
Dionysus: Is in the same seat as Demeter in that he has little idea of who this dude actually is. Don’t think he’d turn him down though
Hephaestus: I don’t think so, but I have no concrete reason for that answer. Vibe check
I feel much safer posting these here on Tumblr so!!! Have some of my Greek God designs starting with the Primary Gods and their partners! I feel so tired of the fact I even need that disclaimer and the anxiety of me posting any of these... My artstyle and design preferences just happen to look exactly like. You know whos artstyle. I trust yall to be kind tho 💔
Not sure if this counts as Epic but more like Greek Mythology, but Hades and Persephone reacting and taking care of their child! reader from the future?
Basically, something happens and now a child with clear signs of divinity appears in Olympus while the gods are having a meeting. Everyone is confused as to why a child would be here until said child turns to Hades and Persephone and gleefully calls out to them, calling them mother/father. Cue shocked looks from the entire pantheon, Demeter faints in the background. After some investigating, they learn that yes this is Hades and Persephone's kid, that said kid came from the future, and now they have to babysit this kid until they can return to their timeline. Cue family bonding shenanigans with Hades and Persephone, alongside child! reader's other relatives.
Little Star
A/N : I didn’t mean to make it lowkey sad at the end part I swear. Persephone and Hades art are from Duvetbox!
WARNING : Future Child!GN!Reader, Persephone x Hades, Slight angst if you squint your eyes.
Word Count : 2.2k
The usual cacophony of an Olympian council meeting was in full swing. Zeus's booming voice vied for dominance with Hera's sharp interjections, Poseidon was gesticulating wildly, causing minor tremors that rattled the golden goblets, and Apollo was attempting to compose a dramatic ode to the current argument, much to Artemis's visible annoyance. Dionysus, thankfully, was relatively subdued, occasionally hiccuping a cloud of wine-scented mist.
Persephone, Queen of the Underworld, sat beside her husband, Hades, a small, contented smile playing on her lips as she observed the divine chaos. Hades, ever the stoic counterpoint to the Olympian melodrama, merely raised an eyebrow at a particularly theatrical gesture from Zeus. He much preferred the quiet dignity of their own realm, but council meetings were an unfortunate, albeit occasional, necessity.
Suddenly, a shimmering distortion appeared in the very center of the grand hall. It pulsed with an unfamiliar energy, silencing even Zeus mid-rant. The air crackled, and the scent of ozone mixed with something else... something ancient and new at the same time. Before any of the assembled deities could react, the distortion solidified, and a small figure stumbled out, landing on the marble floor with a soft thud.
It was a child.
No older than five or six mortal years, the child had wide, curious eyes that seemed to reflect the starlight of the cosmos itself. Their h/l h/c hair tumbled around a face that held an uncanny mixture of delicate beauty and shadowed mystery. Around them, an almost imperceptible aura shimmered – faint, yet undeniably divine. They wore simple, comfortable clothes of a style none of the Olympians recognized.
A collective gasp went through the hall. Children were a rare sight on Olympus, and never unannounced, never like this.
"What is the meaning of this?" Zeus finally thundered, his voice regaining his usual authority, though a flicker of unease crossed his face. "Who dares bring a child into the sacred council?"
Athena, ever analytical, was already on her feet, her keen eyes scrutinizing the little newcomer. "They bear the marks of divinity, Father. Faint, but present. Yet, I do not recognize their lineage."
The child, seemingly unfazed by the array of powerful beings staring at them, pushed themselves up and dusted off their clothes. They scanned the room, their gaze passing over Zeus, Hera, Poseidon, and the others, a small frown creasing their brow as if they were looking for someone specific.
Then, their eyes landed on the King and Queen of the Underworld.
A beatific smile, radiant and utterly joyous, spread across the child's face. With a happy, gleeful shriek that echoed strangely in the sudden silence, they launched themselves forward.
"Papa! Mama!"
The assembled pantheon froze. Jaws, both divine and usually impeccably composed, dropped. Nectar was choked upon. Ambrosia was nearly spilled.
Hades, who had been observing the child with a detached sort of curiosity, felt his usually imperturbable calm shatter. His eyes widened, a rare occurrence, as the small figure barrelled towards them. Persephone, beside him, let out a small, startled gasp, her hand flying to her mouth.
The child didn't slow, their little legs pumping furiously until they reached the dais where Hades and Persephone sat. They practically threw themselves at Hades' legs, hugging his dark robes with surprising strength. Then, they turned, beaming, and reached out a small hand towards Persephone, who was still staring, utterly dumbfounded.
"Mama!" they chirped again, their voice clear and sweet.
The silence in the hall was so profound that one could hear the distant crackle of Hestia's hearth. Then, from the direction of the agricultural deities, came a thud.
Demeter had fainted.
"Well," Hermes finally broke the silence, a mischievous grin spreading across his face, "this is certainly more entertaining than budget allocations for the Underworld."
Chaos erupted once more, but this time it was a bewildered, questioning clamor. Zeus was demanding answers, Hera looked scandalized yet intrigued, and Apollo was already strumming a few experimental chords, clearly inspired.
Hades, for perhaps the first time in millennia, felt utterly lost. He looked down at the child clinging to his leg, then at his wife, whose usually rosy cheeks were pale with shock. "Persephone?" he murmured, his voice rough.
Persephone slowly knelt, her eyes, wide and luminous, fixed on the child. "Little one," she began, her voice trembling slightly, "who... who are you?"
The child tilted their head, their bright e/c eyes, so reminiscent of starlight and something deeper, something chthonic, blinking up at her. "I'm Y/N!" they announced proudly. "Your Y/N!"
Athena, having recovered her composure, stepped forward, Hecate, summoned by the unusual magical disturbance, appearing silently beside her. "The child's aura," Hecate mused, her voice like rustling leaves, "it resonates with both the Underworld and the bloom of spring. And something... else. Something temporal."
After much frantic questioning, magical probing, and the eventual revival of Demeter, who promptly demanded to know who had dared to corrupt her daughter with... a child from the Underworld no less, until the temporal anomaly was explained, at which point she merely looked even more aghast, the truth, as unbelievable as it was, began to emerge.
Y/N was, indeed, Hades and Persephone's child. From the future.
Somehow, through some unknown confluence of future magic or a temporal hiccup of cosmic proportions, they had been flung back in time, landing directly in the Olympian council. The "clear signs of divinity" were a nascent blend of their parents' domains – a faint scent of blooming pomegranates and rich earth, a shadow that clung to them yet wasn't menacing, and eyes that held the wisdom of ancient rivers and the spark of new growth.
"So," Zeus finally summarized, rubbing his temples, after Hermes had returned from a quick, time-bending fact-finding mission, confirming that such a child did indeed exist in a possible future timeline, though the how and why of their current predicament remained a mystery, "you two are... parents. In the future. And now, you're babysitting."
Hades stared at Y/N, who was now happily nestled between him and Persephone on their throne, chattering about something called a "glow-rock" that apparently showed moving pictures. He, Hades, Lord of the Dead, King of the Underworld, was... a father? The idea was so foreign, so... monumental, that his mind struggled to process it.
Persephone, however, seemed to be adapting with surprising speed. The initial shock had given way to a tender curiosity. She listened intently to Y/N's stories of their time, her fingers gently stroking their soft hair. A warmth was spreading through her, a feeling she hadn't known she was missing until this very moment.
"It appears so," Hades finally conceded, his voice still laced with disbelief, but a new, almost imperceptible softness was there too.
The Olympians, after much more discussion and a stern warning from Hera about not interfering with future timelines, even as she cooed at Y/N from a distance, decided that the child would remain in Hades and Persephone's care until a way could be found to return them to their correct time.
And so began the most unexpected chapter in the lives of the King and Queen of the Underworld.
The Underworld, usually a realm of solemn quiet and ordered shadows, was suddenly filled with the patter of small feet and the sound of childish laughter. Y/N, it turned out, was an incredibly curious and surprisingly brave child. They weren't frightened by the gloomy grandeur of Hades' palace, nor by its spectral inhabitants. Cerberus, the fearsome three-headed guardian, became their oversized, adoring puppy after Y/N fearlessly offered him a slightly wilted flower they'd apparently kept tucked in their pocket. The shades whispered in awe as the child, a beacon of life and future promise, danced through the Asphodel Meadows, their laughter echoing where only sighs were usually heard.
Hades found himself in uncharted territory. He, who commanded legions of the dead and held dominion over a vast, subterranean kingdom, was utterly befuddled by the simple needs and endless questions of a small child. He learned to navigate requests for "sky-water" (juice), decipher tales of future toys that sounded like magical artifacts, and endure surprisingly sticky hugs. He even found himself, on more than one occasion, with Y/N asleep on his lap in his study, the child's soft breathing a stark contrast to the silent scrolls of judgment before him. A strange, protective warmth bloomed in his chest, a feeling so potent it almost scared him.
Persephone blossomed. She reveled in her new, albeit temporary, role as "Mama." She took Y/N on explorations of her hidden gardens in the Underworld, where impossible flowers bloomed in eternal twilight. She told them stories of the gods and heroes, her voice soft and enchanting. Y/N would listen, enraptured, occasionally piping up with, "In my story-glow-rock, he has a red cape!" or "She has way more horses in the future, Mama!"
The "family bonding" was a series of delightful, often hilarious, shenanigans.
One day, Y/N decided Hades' throne room needed "more pretty." With the help of some easily charmed — and slightly terrified — shades, they decorated the obsidian throne with drawings made on parchment using charcoal and crushed luminous fungi. Hades walked in to find his seat of power adorned with lopsided flowers, a three-headed dog that looked suspiciously like Cerberus wearing a party hat, and two stick figures holding hands, labeled "Papa" and "Y/N". He merely stared, then, to Persephone's utter astonishment, a small, almost invisible smile touched his lips.
Another time, Y/N tried to "help" Persephone with her correspondence with the upper world. This resulted in several official Olympian decrees being embellished with drawings of cheerful suns and slightly menacing-looking pomegranates. Hermes, delivering the replies, had tears of laughter in his eyes.
Interactions with their "other relatives" were equally memorable. Demeter, after her initial horror, found herself grudgingly charmed by her future grandchild. Y/N, blissfully unaware of the eons of tension between her mother and grandmother, would often seek Demeter out when she visited Olympus. They'd present her with a perfectly ripe pomegranate and ask her about "how plants say hello." Demeter found herself, much to her own surprise, explaining the rustling of leaves and the turning of sunflowers.
Hestia adored Y/N, and the child loved to sit by her hearth, listening to stories and sharing snippets of their future world. Zeus found himself cornered more than once by a very determined small deity asking complex questions about lightning that even he struggled to answer in a child-friendly manner. Hera, despite her stern demeanor, was seen slipping Y/N extra ambrosia cakes.
The days turned into weeks. Hades and Persephone, the formidable rulers of the Underworld, found themselves utterly captivated by this small being who called them Papa and Mama. They learned to anticipate Y/N's needs, to comfort their rare tears, to celebrate their joyous discoveries. Hades discovered a previously unknown talent for telling surprisingly good bedtime stories, and Persephone found that her heart, already full of love for her husband and her realm, had an infinite capacity to expand.
One evening, as Persephone was tucking Y/N into a specially prepared bed in their chambers – a bed adorned with soft moss and glowing Underworld crystals – the child looked up at her with wide, serious eyes.
"Y/N?" Persephone asked softly.
"Mama," they said, their small hand reaching out to touch her cheek. "I love you. And Papa. Even if he looks grumpy sometimes, his hugs are warm like the sun in your garden."
Persephone felt a familiar warmth spread through her, tears pricking her eyes. She leaned down and kissed their forehead. "We love you too, little star," she whispered. "More than all the gems in the Underworld and all the flowers in the world above."
Hades stood in the doorway, watching them. His usual stern expression was softened, his dark eyes holding an emotion he rarely allowed himself to feel, let alone show. This glimpse into their future, this unexpected gift of a child, had changed them both in ways they were only beginning to understand.
The mystery of Y/N's arrival remained, and they knew, with a pang of sorrow, that the child would eventually have to return to their own time. Hecate and Hermes were working on it, deciphering the temporal anomaly. But for now, they were a family. A strange, unexpected, time-tossed family, but a family nonetheless.
As Y/N drifted off to sleep, clutching a small, smooth stone Hades had given them from the banks of the River Styx, Persephone joined her husband in the doorway. He wrapped an arm around her, pulling her close.
"They are... remarkable," Hades said, his voice a low rumble.
Persephone leaned her head against his shoulder. "They are ours," she replied softly. "And even when they go back, we'll know. We'll have this."
The future was no longer an abstract concept. It was laughter in the shadowed halls, sticky fingers on ancient thrones, and the unwavering, pure love of a child who had traveled through time to show them a glimpse of the joy that awaited them. The King and Queen of the Underworld held each other, their hearts full, forever changed by the little star who had briefly, brilliantly, lit up their timeless existence.
Rhea's and Cronos's kids. Yes, all together for one pic. No, they didn't fight, I didn't bribe them, no one was hurt this was a peaceful affair I am totally fine and I totally did not stitch single portraits together because it was less of a hassle.
Oh, a few of them transitioned their appearance growing up. They have their reasons.
👀 Detail below from left to right (with a few shoutouts) 👀
Poseidon Enosichthon (Enesidaone) Themeliouchos — The pale, lively kid with the always busy hands. What happened to him? A younger brother and his detached father, basically. He's excited about life in general, but still very bad at saying no to his family (or anything else), so he'll end up doing everything at once and trouble always finds him. Being the middle kid ain't always easy.
Big shoutout to @rin-sith for the huge inspiration her Poseidon design was for his clothes and armour pieces. My Poseidon doesn't believe in clothes, usually.
Demeter Sito Thesmophorus — Though she isn't technically the big sister, she always took to the task of keeping her arms open for her siblings, no matter the grief it brought her. Always will she be singing songs, in part to forget the lot bestowed on her by her brothers and her father and keep on – but also in part to give the joys of life to gods and mortals who walk her realm and feel at ease with her. As Rhea's kid she'll uphold tradition gently and firmly, and feed everyone who comes to her table, even if it costs her.
Hestia — She might be gentle, but she can never be forgotten. To all that come to her hearth she will listen and grant them protection, even if this sacred solemnity cost her the arms of a lover. She is a lover to none, and loved by all, first she receives sacrifice. Herons gave her their wings to stoke flame, brush out cold cinders. She would rather her skin be stained white by flour than black by soot, though. Her baking is still the very best.
Zeus Olympios Panhellenios — Wide are the shoulders of this son of titans, and they carry burdens of judgement across all Greece. Over the years he aquired a thick skin on them, but never do the troubles of his family wear him down for long, although the same family has brought him to the brink of constant paranoia. The jewellery he chose to wear on the day Typhon cleared out Olympus is something he will never again take off, like the memory and fear of defeat it is part of him, conductor to lightning and passion.
A big grateful nod to @justcommander for the long and wonderful talks about Typhon, he is part of all my thoughts about Zeus now.
Hera Syzygia Alexandros — The sharp eyes of this queen of queens will trace you through darkest night. By her fathers sickle and her great veil she safeguards and upholds sacred laws and traditions and unions, and as protector of men her word triumphs. A guardian of women, she neither tolerates betrayal nor does she hold the cutting edge of her jealousy back for the sake of those who must obey discriminating law against those who the same law allows to overstep a hallowed bond of two. The shade of Baphomet suits you, honey.
Hades — In form and might and character he outgrew his father by far. He is still the same quiet and thoughtful person, but despite the darkness, he, too, is a guardian of life, a keeper of flames. In his gentle hand rests the light of life, on his other arm coils the means to give it, to take it away. Fiercely he rules over the line between realms, allowing hardly any crossing, but on a late summers evening he'll walk the golden shaded groves among the company of all flowers of the earth, too.
See, lovely @ruthlessness69 , how confident he has grown? The kindness of your Hades helped him. A lot! Ask Persephone, though, she'll tell you that he can solve his beloved crosswords without extra light, because he is still a big glowing kid in his heart.
All designs by me. Rhea's aspects come with a broader frame, more pronounced colours and animal traits, and no fear to show skin. Cronos shows in matters of lines, contrast and temper, and a certain tendency towards introversion.
I know I recently made a similar post in regards to 600 strike, but I can't stop thinking about what this song could've looked like if we had all 12 Olympians taking part.
So, this is what I've managed to come up with thus far. It ain't much, but it's honest work.
(I won't be going in any particular order. This is going to be a long post so brace yourselves.)
Dionysus: His whole argument is that Odysseus never lets loose and parties. Instead, he's spent these 20 years being all miserable and serious.
Athena's rebuttal: Sure, he never lets loose, but how could he? He's been continuously going through nightmare after nightmare. If Dionysus agrees to let him go, he'd return to his usual whimsical, silly guy self and party for days to come, celebrating the reunion with his family.
Hermes: Although Hermes wants to let Ody go, he still chooses to tease Athena because he's a troublemaker like that. He would say something obviously wrong, just so Zeus can't say that he didn't participate. He'd probably say something dumb like "had Ody been smart, he would've entered Circe's palace and simply stolen the piggies when she wasn't looking".
Athena's rebuttal: She'd roll her eyes but play along. Her response would basically be no, he couldn't have done that because Circe would've known. And even if he succeeded what would he do with a dozen pigs on board? She'd then point out how similar the two are: both very cunning, manipulative and skilled with words.
Demeter: Her argument could be that while Odysseus was away, he failed to take care of his land and people, leading to the agriculture suffering (because I honestly doubt that Penelope had the mental capacity to attend to all that the way she normally would with everything on her plate).
Athena's rebuttal: She'd try to draw the parallel between the relationship between Demeter and Persephone and Odysseus and Telemachus. She could point out how heartbroken Demeter felt when she couldn't see her beloved daughter, tugging on her heartstrings and convincing her that Odysseus was going through the exact same agony.
Artemis: I honestly think she wouldn't care about Ody. The only reason why she'd participate is to appease Zeus. Anyway, I think she could do the Hera bit where she's like "gimme one good reason why I should help".
Athena's rebuttal: Athena could try to recount the boar encounter to show how great of a hunter Odysseus is. Plus, she could add that Ody's weapon of choice is the bow aka something that Artemis also uses.
Apollo: Since we're doing Artemis, might as well do her twin next. Apollo, as the patron god of Troy, could point out that Odysseus destroyed the walls he helped build. Then, he could also add that argument about the sirens.
Athena's rebuttal: Here, Athena could say that it wasn't Ody who destroyed the walls, but the Trojans who demolished them in order to let the wooden horse in. As for the sirens, she can repeat that argument she used in the official song. Or, better yet, say that if Odysseus returned home, his journey would inspire countless songs and works of art.
Hephaestus: I think his entire bit is perfectly fine (both in terms of the argument, as well as the rebuttal). Either way, I doubt Hephaestus really cares and it shows. He just wants to get back to work... And Athena wants to be out of there asap considering their history.
Aphrodite: I think her argument is good, although I do find it a bit strange since she is most typically associated with romantic/sexual love. Hera or Hestia would've been better picks for familial love imo. Anyway, if I were to rewrite her argument, I'd make her be petty and say something like "he hasn't bed his wife in 2 decades!". Overall, she really couldn't care less, she just wants to mess with Athena.
Athena's rebuttal: I think she'd snap and be petty back, saying something like "well, who's fault is that?" (considering it was Aphrodite who basically started the Trojan War). Then, she'd recompose herself and say that if Aphrodite agreed to free Odysseus, he'd return to his wife and make up for all the lost passion.
Ares: Great argument imo, no notes. Sidenote, but I love Ares so much. In fact, I named my first dog after him.
Athena's rebuttal: Her canon rebuttal needs work, I think. After all, it wasn't the lack of bloodshed Ares had a problem with, but cowardice. If I were to rewrite it, I'd make Athena defend Ody's actions by pointing out that what Ares sees as "cowardice" was simply strategy. As for the Telemachus call-out, she could point out Ares' hypocrisy. On one hand, he insults the kid for being pathetic and on the other, he prevents his father from returning home, thus not allowing him to teach the necessary skills he needs in order to be a warrior. Additionally, she could appeal to Ares' softer side. He's one of the few gods who actually loves and cares about his kids, so she could appeal to that.
Poseidon: Yes, the big, bad man himself. At first, Athena is a bit worried about her ability to convince him (I mean, in the original Odyssey it says that he was one of the few gods she feared opposing directly + they already have a strained relationship due to the Athens rivalry). However, Poseidon is so done with this mortal that he just lets him go before his niece even gets the chance to open her mouth. In reality, he wants Ody to be set free just so he could kill him with his own hands. He's way too invested in this, dammit.
Hera: As the goddess of marriage and family, Hera could argue that Odysseus had been a bad husband and father. I mean, he spent 20 years pissing off gods and monsters instead of focusing on returning to his wife and child.
Athena's rebuttal: Athena could argue that he's actually been an exceptional family man considering how much he was willing to sacrifice just to return to those he loved. Then, just to put the nail in the coffin, she'd repeat the whole "never once has he cheated on his wife" slam dunk.
Zeus: Our thunder bringer isn't exactly pleased that his daughter beat the game. In fact, he's pissed because she not only humiliated him by winning, but she also won by humiliating him (with the whole not cheating argument). Anyway, the canon event happens where he strikes her with lightning and she begs for Ody to be set free.
