alright so here we go. massive tw for childhood sexual abuse and sexual talk in general i guess. and spoilers i guess for the sinner season 1 lmao.
um so mom and i binge watched s1 of the sinner while i was on vacay and we were talking about it the other night, specifically the relationship between cora and phoebe. and mom was like ‘’in my experience terminally sick kids are always like that’’ and i assumed she meant just kind of brash and asshole-ish and i was like ‘’yeah because they can get away with it because they’re dying lmao’’ and she was like ‘’no not just that. like sexually.’’ and like cora and phoebe’s relationship was so fucked up. like she literally got her sister to make out with her and finger her because she wanted to know what it was like and i’ve heard that the book was like a million times worse and she was way more forward and demanding. and last night it fucking hit me like a ton of bricks. my abuser’s older brother had cancer. he was diagnosed really young. he was sick and going through treatment throughout their entire childhood. i even remember a benefit they held for him that i went to with her and she tried to teach me how to play pool and they had karaoke and we sang waterfalls by tlc because i was really good at left eye’s rap. he died of it in his early 20′s, long after we lost contact. i’ve suspected for a while that maybe she did what she did to me because her brother was doing the same thing to her and this just kinda solidified it for me. it’s no excuse obviously but it makes things make a little more sense.