The year is 2016.
November.
Vienna.
Three RHCP enthusiasts.
For two of them, this would be their fifth concert.
Inspired by the incredible work of our friend Nastya, an idea arrived - to bring an awesome eye-hat to the sound guy who I met in Helsinki.
This idea quickly snowballed into bringing eye-hats for the ENTIRE band.
And so,
We have the hats;
We have elegantly scented and signed envelopes;
And we sure do have some of that excellent thing called enthusiasm.
We had three options:
Meet the band in town and personally give them the hats;
Get the bands’ attention at the concert by holding a genius banner and give them the hats there;
Pass the hats through the sound guy.
We also sought advice from the wise and the lucky - the lovely Maxim Elfimov, a fan with encyclopedic knowledge, and the redhotchilifamily community.
RHCPfamily said that the best way is to ask the crew, and Maxim told us about Henrik - a legendary fan who has seen over a hundred concerts.
Needless to say, we immediately found Henrik on Facebook, and he replied to us with warmth.
Hotel Hyatt, 5 o’clock, he said.
Hyatt, 4:50.
Hyatt, 5:20.
We decide to go on exploring charming Vienna.
We have the hats with us.
We walked a lot. We ate a lot. We were exhausted.
Slowly making our way back home, we passed a classical, ceremonial, slightly snobbish cafe. My gaze was lured by the beauty of the interior and a portrait on the wall, so I stopped to have a closer look.
My amigos noticed my absence and came back to fetch me -
“Kat, that’s Josh in there.”
“That’s him! It’s Klinghoffer!”
Well I looked around and didn’t see anyone.
Just as I was turning around to congratulate them on their wit, I noticed the extraordinary size of their eyes.
This was no joke.
One small step to the left unmistakably and immediately revealed that back, that hat, those hands, the gestures
It was him.
Josh Klinghoffer, the guitarist of the Red Hot Chili Peppers.
Someone who is a frequent guest of my mind.
Three tired and full people suddenly realized that they are full of energy and hungry for strudel.
However, while we were coming up with a respectable and reasonable plan, the cafe got hastily bombarded with an array of well-dressed pensioners.
The only free table was the table next to him.
Josh was in the company of a beautiful lady with a mane of red hair. Their meeting didn’t have an obvious romantic flair.
While we were dealing with some table drama (table for two, three people, shock), Mr. Klinghoffer and his companion began getting ready to leave.
My magnificent friend Theodore grabbed my hand and calmly and firmly told me to get the hat and meet him outside.
And so, we are by the door. I am in a state of slight panic; Theodore is flawlessly cool, calm and collected.
He started the conversation so effortlessly and elegantly that it deserves an ode of it’s own.
Josh was tall, friendly, attentive and warm.
He was wearing an awesome jacket.
Despite not being conventionally handsome, he is incredibly charming.
I’m having trouble with remembering exact words, for all of it, still feels like a dream.
When I passed the envelope to Josh, he read the inscription and noted that it was no ordinary hat, but an eye-hat!
Spaseebo! - He thanked us in Russian. Of course, I told him we came from Moscow!
You’re sitting at the next table - yes, it was the only free one (why did I say that? why? just why?)
Do you guys know if some performance just finished? Because the cafe suddenly became very crowded. - We don’t know. Everyone came from there, and we came from over there. (I could’ve said something witty, but no. But, as a wise friend said, you told him the truth, and that is way more important than wittiness).
Thank you so much and see you tomorrow!
See you tomorrow, Josh!
We float into the cafe, rush to our darling Ksenia, who is sitting at a table by the window, and just as we are about to tell her everything -
There’s a knock on the window -
It’s Josh
He’s wearing our hat
He points at it, smiles, and gives us a thumbs up.
It was the best strudel we ever had.
We have shared our joy with Henrik, and he assured us that the hotel that we need is the Imperial Hotel, which is right opposite the cafe. We fruitlessly hung around there for a bit but decided to thank Henrik and applaud his inspiring craziness by giving him a spare concert ticket that we had.
The day of the concert.
We are levitating with hope.
We have created a fantastic - I dare even say, a legendary! - poster.
Two hours before doors open. We’re not the first in line, but definitely among the front row crowd.
The hats and the poster and in a little bag.
I volunteer to carry it, as I’ll easily explain what’s in the bag to security.
To cut a long story short, I am forced to leave the poster in a locker because it’s too big.
No pleading, no calm facts, nothing helps.
My amazing friends have secured us a spot in the front row, right of Josh, right by the sound systems (God save all earplugs).
We are eager to catch Josh’s gaze and wave the hats at him.
However, our beautifully jumpy friend did not flip his hair in our direction; we were left unnoticed.
But the lovely, lovely sound master recognized me, was moved with his gift and happily agreed to pass the hats on to the rest of the band!
I was still held captive by the beauty of our poster, so I insisted that we go to the hotel…but exhaustions and common sense took over quite quickly.
The second we were at home, I sent pictures of our masterpiece to anyone who might show it to the band…so far I’ve received nothing but compliments from RHCPfamily :)
So now we await new photos of the band with a tremble in our hearts - what if they will wear the magnificent eye-hat?
