Thank you Jon Bloom and John Piper for the good read. [Confession] Recently, I've been very doubtful of the goodness of of god and at times, even his existence and it's been urking the crap out of me... I used to beat myself over when I would struggle with my lack of faith in him, thinking that it was my fault and that I have to muster up some kind of human worldly power on my own to gain it back somehow, but I realize that along with all the sins He took on, Jesus died for even my unbelief and that I don't have to be doing this or that to impress anyone or Him. If you're doubting God, all that He is, and you're struggling to believe in Him, I want you to know that you are right where you need to be and that you're not alone in this. You don't have to blame yourself and beat yourself over not believing (Something I've done too many times). Jesus is right there with you running and fighting alongside and you don't have to fret or feel condemned that you're struggling in Faith, because Faith doesn't come from working hard or meeting some crazy expectation, but it comes from knowing Christ. He will meet you right where you are in the dead of night and help you to see the light of day and run towards it. Regardless of what we may feel, whether positive or negative, it doesn't change the fact that we are His children and coheirs with Christ (Romans 8:16-17) and most importantly, that we are #redeemed from our losses and iniquities. So ironic as it may sound, I'm choosing to stand confidently in my lack of Faith, knowing that God's grace covers my unbelief and that He grants you and I the precious gift of Faith (Ephesians 2:8). I may feel like I don't have the Faith to believe, but at the sight of the cross, everything, including the feeling that I don't have Faith, fades away and He is there.