He couldn't believe what he was looking at. All these months, years, of trying to convince Veronica that they could build a family together. That he had wanted it. That she wouldn't be alone with whatever scared her, and he had thought through all the logistics a thousand times, because it had always been like that in his dreams: movie world, wife, kids. He had always wanted to have exactly what his parents had and relive the reality he had grown up in, adopting the opposite role this time.
Whatever seemed merciful enough to finally bring this wish to him, it clearly had the strangest sense of humor. And not just because after years of Veronica changing her mind back and forth, it was nearly impossible to tell if she still wanted children or not. One day she would agree with him, only to say the opposite on another... And then she showed Eric a piece of plastic with two pink lines sticking out like a sore thumb. A positive pregnancy test. It should be an explosion of happiness, a moment of celebration for the tiniest-biggest dream he had ever wished to come true, yet, all Eric could think about was how the last time the two got close, it was make-up sex for the affair her merciful heart could no longer afford to keep secret.
His job made it so damn easy to track time, to check when he was home and when he left, and Eric couldn't help the feeling that this child wasn't the fruit of their perfect timing. The baby was going to look like his wife and the man who kept his side of the bed warm while Eric was away, on another set, so all he could feel was grief and disgust.
Who cared how Veronica felt when she spat out a hurt "How dare you" after Eric asked her if she thought there even was the thinnest chance the baby was his? This kind of pain hadn't crossed her mind when she invited someone else to their bedroom, so why should he regret any of the ugly aftermath of her infidelity?
"I can't stand being in the same room as you right now," closed the conversation, and he stormed out of the house, replaying every word that had been said.
Should I congratulate you, or are you trying to say I'm gonna be a father?
What?
I'm asking if the baby is mine. I wasn't home, you fucked another guy, I'm asking: is there a chance I should give a fuck about this test?
How dare you? I would never risk getting—
Oh, don't make me laugh...
There were no vases shattered into a million pieces, no glasses smashed against the wall, no bruised knuckles, and no tiny red dots left behind on the light wall.
I can't stand being in the same room as you right now.
And then there was silence.
It filled the luxurious detached house in New Jersey for a couple more days. Awfully long, bitter days when neither reached out. Cathartic silence. Eric had been staying at Zach's until it was time to return to work, and he had to do something about the news. Now the perspective was different, though. Everything was black and white, and there were no greys anymore.
If he wasn't the father he was going to leave Veronica.
**
"You want to do what?!"
Veronica chugged the glass of water she had poured herself to cool her nerves down, hoping she hadn't heard him right. A prenatal paternity test. That's how he perceived her. That's how determined he was to humiliate her and himself, seemingly taking the strangest revenge possible. She should have kept the affair to herself, and he wouldn't have noticed anything, but every time he left the house for long, his presence was like a truth serum. She couldn't stand lying to him when he was so caring, told her that he had missed her all that time. "You're being ridiculous. You're insane! I'm not doing that, you're embarrassing yourself." She snickered, holding onto the empty glass as if it anchored her right then and there. "If someone somehow finds out... What will they think about me? What will they think about you?" She waved her hand dismissively, leaving no room for any protests, but Eric wasn't backing off.
"No, you owe me a fucking paternity test. I deserve to know if the baby is mine, now."
"It is-"
"It is no one's now! If the test proves I'm the father, I will pretend I'd never heard about someone shoving his cock up where it doesn't belong. I will never say a word about how shit a wife you have been; not to you, nor myself, or any-fucking-body." He clenched his jaw in physical pain that looking at her in this uncertainty brought him. "But as soon as I learn those two lines have nothing to do with me, you're leaving my life." With his lips trembling and brows coming together as he focused on not breaking into angry tears, Eric shook his head a little. The sight of Veronica's eyes glistening with his own helplessness and pain nearly broke him.
"That's cruel," she whispered, voice breaking as she swallowed the tears she had been blocking from running down her cheeks. "You're cruel. The baby is yours."
Because you say so? asked his eyes. He had been drowning in the sea of lies he once thought was a life-giving spring. Her words and promises were empty, and so proved the list of things she once claimed were true. Eric had to bite down on his lip and escape her gaze, look away so he didn't succumb to the same kind of mercy he had been falling for for years.
"No one wants this test to support your words more than I do."
