I wish there were more like corn dildo stories, just like bizarre stuff you find doing housework
between the tooth rings, the fox skull, the Christmas Microwave™, the cursed teddy bear, the Debauchery Crate™, and the six matching Keanu Reeves t-shirts this house is one murder mystery away from being a point and click adventure
heck, we’ve got a wooden trout wall hanging, a pencil sketch of one of the Ninja Turtles, and a hand towel with my roommate’s headshot and the words “Sneki Boi” written on it and that’s all just in the guest bathroom














