#fic rambles

[lightningbig]

listen I understand why anyone writing a bodyguard au for hollanov defaults to ilya being the body guard and shane being the superstar. but I just think we're collectively sleeping on the appeal of playboy celeb ilya rozanov getting scuffed like a kitten by his deadpan, no nonsense security detail, shane hollander

[imagine-darksiders]

Maybe they'll go easy on me when they find out I was sick?

Optimus would. If anything, he’s apologetic for hounding you when you clearly weren’t in control of your mental faculties. He can see for himself that you’re not looking like your usual self, still wan and poorly from whatever had been ailing you.

Ratchet is a lot less forgiving.

It’s unnerving to have the medic, who is typically aloof and standoffish, suddenly fixate on you like a bristling guard dog.

He tries to sequester you in his med bay under the guise of quarantining you from the other humans, when in actual fact, he just intends to keep a watchful optic on you for worsening symptoms.

The entire time, he berates you for scaring the life out of the rest of the team - not him though, he cannot stress that enough.

Coincidentally, he’s also fabricated a medical leave form and given you strict instructions to present it to Terry the moment you get back to the dairy, after Ratchet deems you well enough to leave base.

You ‘lose’ the form, of course. You’re on the mend and perfectly fine to work.

Ratchet finds out when you come back to the base the same day and he spots the fresh muck caking your overalls.

That’s it. You’re on Ratchet-enforced bed rest. He has Fowler fabricate a story for your boss, something about how you’ve been taken into witness protection for a few days for some crime committed in town.

Bulkhead could not be more delighted that you’re around more, though he’s gracious enough to at least pretend to be upset on your behalf that Ratchet is essentially keeping you prisoner at the base.

All of them are privately relieved. After the week they’d spent fretting, it feels good to have you under their roof again, even if you do seem grumpy and exasperated by the attention.

[merthurtrenches]

“Do you know how long I’ve loved you?” Cas asks in return, “Because I don’t,” and Dean thinks, oh shit, we’re going big, “But when I was an infinite, celestial being I had an almost-perfect grasp of time, down to the tiniest nanosecond. I knew exactly when the sun would set every night, and I knew when it would rise in the morning. I knew the moment the tide would start to recede from the shore. I could calculate the exact moment I found you in the pit, and the exact moment your head broke the surface after climbing out of your own grave in Pontiac, Illinois.” He cocks his head slightly. “But I’ll never be able to pinpoint the moment I fell in love with you.” Beneath the covers, he grabs Dean’s hand. “Every time I thought I’d figured it out, I remembered a time before that, and then a time before that. Eventually I came to the conclusion that ever since we’ve met, you’ve been happening all around me. Happening to me. It’s absurd to think a shell won’t get wet if you drop it in the ocean. You’re my ocean, Dean.”

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?????

The fic is Professional Couple Only by saltyfeathers btw.

[eiraeths]

ghost tries to tell soap he loves him by slow blinking at him like a cat. soap just thinks ghost is tired and makes himself a safe space for ghost to sleep on/near. unfortunately for ghost, it works and now he wants to crawl in soap’s rib cage and marry him

[virtual-angelll]

I think Hikaru's headcanons as aroace are so cool, but today on ao3 i came across a fic where he doesn't think it's that great to KISS YOSHIKI?????

I saw the "aroace" and "kiss" tag on the fic and thought WOW this must be good, maybe it's a story where they kiss but decide not to commit to something traditionally romantic like yeahhhhhh 😋

But then it was like "i don't feel anything"

YOU LIARRRRRRR

Hikaru would totally love to kiss especially if it was Yoshiki what do you mean....

I personally like to think of Hikaru on the aroace spectrum where he doesn't experience romance and sex the way a human would

The fics where their greatest form of intimacy is the hand on his chest is SO aroace coded to me...

[messitydepressity]

Ellie was definitely the type of baby to not only stick her finger into an electrical socket, but she also enjoyed licking them for the little zaps like the weirdo she is.

That child’s brain has been wired differently from the very start.

Joel never stood a chance.

[idkmyartwork]

Chris and Gut talk in the backyard, on lawn chairs drinking beer while Adrian plays with Gut’s two kids, Sarah and Connor.

Gut used the neck of his beer bottle to wave in Adrian’s general direction, “This is still so hard to believe.” 

Chris couldn’t stop the snort of disbelief, even if he tried, “You’re telling me.”

“It’s more like one of Adrian’s lies, so you two really are engaged?”

The pause was longer than necessary- more of an admission than anything else before Chris forced himself to reply with, “Yup.”

“That must be one hell of a story.” 

Chris couldn’t think of anything, so he stayed silent, causing Gut to turn and look at him for the first time since they began talking about Chris’ future nuptials. 

“Christopher Smith, the notorious Chimp Arm, silent on the topic of a conquest? I can’t believe my own ears.”

“Dude, this is your brother we’re talking about! 

“Yeah, well, you’re fuckin’ Thimble so I don’t know what to tell ya.”

Chris grimaced

“I don’t even know where to start.”

“You can start with the first time you decided to bang the walking basket case?”

“Dude, not cool.”

Gut rolled his eyes.

Chris took a big swig of his beer to delay the inevitable, “I didn’t know it was Adrian the first time.”

“What?!” Gut gasped then leaned in closer to Chris, “Are you telling me that fucker is kinky?” 

“Nor the second, or third- or well,” Chris pinched his face staring at the bottle in his hands, their story didn’t sound so great when he left out the superheroing part. Goddamn Vigilante. “Technically, Adrian wore a mask for the first couple years,” Chris said, averting his eyes. Was it a couple years? Did they bang that first year? No…

He didn’t think so.

“He wore-” Gut mouthed out Chris’ explanation as his mind wrapped around the idea that his baby brother hid his identity to fuck Dorian’s high school best friend.

“Now that I’m saying it outloud, it’s not that-”

“No-no. This sounds exactly like something Adrian would do. We both knew how obsessed he became with you right before you left for the army.”