#foreverinmyhead

[foreverinmyhead]

Discovered on

42°30'57.6"N 87°54'39.6"W via MacroPoint

[foreverinmyhead]

Arizona, US

[foreverinmyhead]

Wednesday, gotta make it worth

[foreverinmyhead]

[foreverinmyhead]

Relationships - Notes to myself

I see a lot of people struggling with their relationships whether they’re belong to that relationship or not. Some of people are missing the points of what relationship really is or how we become a victim by our behaviors like everyone else in life.

Each of us carries certain ideals within us about the kind of person we want to be or the kind of person we want the other person to be to “us”. These ideals go back to our earliest ages. We all feel that there is something missing in our charachter, something we want but cannot acquire on our own. We usually fall in love with a person who seems to fill this void. This process is not conscious and depends somewhat on luck. We wait for the right person to come our way, and when we fall in love with them, we hope that they will respond to our love or to our ideals. We’re giving them every inner parts of us we have to acquire those ideals and eventually we become a victim by our unconsciousness. So, “soulmate” are nothing but illusion for human relationships but we’re tend to believe it just to feel better or different or special.

Often our personality is shaped by “the way we are treated”. If our parents, spouse is defensive or argumentative, we tend to respond in kind to reduce the amount of stress we have because our cognitive load about to explode. Do not take people's expressed character traits as real. Maybe the characteristics they display reflect the behavior of the people they constantly come into contact with, or a sign of a trauma or maybe they hide the opposite. A harsh appearance perhaps hides someone seeking warmth, An oppressive, serious appearance may be trying to hide emotions that they cannot control. “The key is to nurture the aspects that are not presented to them or are suppressed.”

Humans do not have free will because all of our thoughts, decisions, and behaviors are entirely determined by biological and environmental factors. We do not have a free will but we have a power to fight against it. We have to learn how to act against unwanted behaviors which is the hardest thing to learn but that is the only way to be successful in our relationships and live a happy life.

[foreverinmyhead]

[foreverinmyhead]

The isolation level of living in a country you do not speak the language of and young people BARELY speak English...

[foreverinmyhead]

Some people "judge" me as nonchalant, but what they don't realize is that this "calm" took years of consuming immense anger, sadness, and pain to build