FROM ACROSS THE ROOM
summary: he’s so into you but all he does is admire you from afar. what a loser!
feat. yuno, nozel, fuegoleon, william
a/n: gn!reader except for yuno’s cuz i got lazy to change things
also, writing styles vary cuz i couldn’t write anything in one sitting like i’ve been adding sentences here and there at different points in my life. this has been a journey for like 2 years but now i’m at the finish line thank god.
anyways, as always, thank you to everyone who still reads my fics no matter how inactive i am ily <3
yuno could count all the times he felt nervous on the fingers of one hand.
one, when his necklace almost got stolen.
two, when asta insisted on roaming around outside at the dead of the night he was so anxious of getting caught he couldn’t breathe.
three, the magic knight exam.
four, that time one seemingly easy mission had gone awfully wrong.
five, you — his hands would tremble at the mere sight of you.
his demeanor seems to change every time you were around, every muscle in his body stiffening, while his consciousness floated away. in his eyes, a spotlight shines above you while the rest of the room drowns out in pitch black. he was so enamored by you, making him feel things he doesn’t quite understand.
klaus paused, annoyed by yuno’s sudden unresponsiveness. mimosa giggled and pointed to the person at the end of yuno’s line of vision.
“ah, y/n again i see,” he teased.
yuno turned his attention back to his 2 friends in front of him looking as if he was a deer caught in headlights.
“y/n is so pretty, isn’t she?” mimosa chimed in.
yuno felt his heart race but he just shrugged.
“i guess,”
“why don’t you ask her out? you seem to be into her anyway.” klaus quirked an eyebrow.
he almost almost got a reaction from yuno but as expected, he shrugged again.
klaus groaned then proceeded to return to the conversation he was having with mimosa. the pair walked away towards the snack bar while chatting, not really caring if yuno followed or not.
of course, he didn’t.
instead, he turned his head back to where you stood, wanting to catch one final glimpse at you. you were scanning the room, seemingly looking for someone when your eyes met his.
your eyes lit up, and began to make your way to him. yuno quickly averted his gaze, palms sweating as he pretended to look for his squadmates.
“hi,” you greeted politely.
yuno could barely move almost as if he was in a catatonic state.
“i wasn’t so sure when we’ll ever meet again but…” you paused, taking out a neatly folded clothing item from your bag. “i wanted to say thanks for lending me your cape that time i was feverish in the middle of our joint mission.”
“it’s no big deal,” he spoke softly. “you can keep it if you want.”
you frowned. “hm, i don’t think it would be right for me keep it. it is a personal item. it has the golden dawn insignia after all.”
you reached for his hands and placed the item in his palms. his hands felt cold and unsteady.
“your hands are so cold, yuno. almost like ice.”
yuno swallowed thickly. he could not speak, the words pooling in his throat could not be forced out. he wanted to carry on a conversation with you perhaps starting with mundane topics then progressing to more personal ones.
“thanks,” he finally said.
you smiled softly, bowed your head, and turned to leave.
“wait! do you—” yuno blurted out.
“hm?” you tilted your head back.
“nothing, nothing. i— have a good night, y/n.”
you had this look on your face. disappointment? sadness? hurt? yuno wasn’t really sure. he was too nervous to read too much into it.
“right. you too,” you smiled (in a sad way, yuno thought) and quickly walked away from him.
“you let her go,” klaus would have said. “she was right in front of you, and you let her go?”
yuno cursed under his breath. maybe he’d have another chance. there will be a next time, there always is, there has to be.
but even he wasn’t so sure anymore.
ever since the day nozel met you, he could not think of anything else but you.
you were taking up too much space in his head and he didn’t like that. lately, it was taking longer than usual for him to finish simple paperworks because truthfully he daydreamed about you in between his work. he felt so inefficient, so sluggish, so out of control. and he didn’t like not being in control.
nozel sighed for what felt like the 5th time in the last hour as he caught himself out of focus again. a knock on his door had pulled him back to reality.
“come in,”
the door slowly opened revealing a slightly disheveled but still charming nonetheless—you.
he swallowed thickly and turned his attention back to the mountain of paperwork in front of him. but as you inched closer to his desk, his thoughts became more and more clouded.
“captain nozel,” you saluted. “i apologize for the intrusion but i came by to submit my report of last week’s mission.”
as you rifled through your thick envelope of files, nozel decided to sneak a glance at you. he noticed the bags under your eyes, and the paleness of your lips. you had been working yourself to death no doubt. it pained him to see you this way.
at last you had found the document. you placed it on his desk, your hands trembling as you did.
“sorry that took a while,” you said as you combed your fingers through your unkempt hair. “the fatigue is finally catching up to me.”
rest, y/n. i can’t stand seeing you like this, he wanted to say. but instead, he gave you a quick nod not even bothering to look up from his paperwork.
you frowned at his reserved responses. you let a moment of silence pass and there it is again, that odd tension that hung in the air whenever the two of you were near each other. people have been definitely noticing; the more people pointed it out the more it bothered you.
his silence stretched on, and you figured he had nothing else to say. he was hunched over his desk, too focused on the papers laid out in front of him to even spare you a glance or wonder why you were still there.
but he did wonder. your presence was making him anxious. suddenly he could hear so much — the tick tick tick of the clock, the creaking of the floorboards as you shift your weight from one foot to the other, the rapid beating of his heart.
“captain?” you hesitated but spoke at last.
you continued. “may i ask you something?”
“go on.” he said, raising his head and finally looking at you.
your lips quivered, suddenly conscious now that his eyes were on you.
“i—i wanted to know if…” again, you hesitated.
“if?” he quirked an eyebrow, urging you to go on. he was growing impatient.
“if…” you licked your lips and continued. “…if i did something wrong? to you perhaps, or maybe as a magic knight?”
nozel shifted in his seat.
“why do you think that?”
it was now or never
“you seem to be cold and dismissive towards me which i noticed you are not with others. at first, i thought it was just the way that you are. i didn’t want to read too much into it but people have been telling me that they’ve noticed as well. and so, i wanted to ask if i’ve done anything to offend you…”
nozel was stunned. he wanted to tell you how he really felt about you, and all the love he has for you—the love he wanted to give you.
but he couldn’t.
“no, you’ve done nothing wrong, y/n. as for you performance as a magic knight, you’re at par with your peers.” he gave you a quick, stiff smile. “you may leave if you have no other concerns,”
you were in disbelief. you anticipated this but somehow, it hurt you.
but why are you hurt? where is it coming from? you don’t really know.
nozel heard the forceful shutting of the door. he sighed and rubbed his face in frustration. he wanted to scream. after a few moments, he rested his head on the desk and thought, it’s for the best, it’s for the best.
fuegoleon has been infatuated with you for quite some time now. from looking for you in a crowded room to his gaze steadily fixated on you when you were close by, he was absolutely smitten. he was pretty in denial at first; those seemingly harmless glances of his became lengthy stares, long enough for some people to notice his little crush on you.
“oh? what’s this?” mereoleona blocked his view and smirked.
fuegoleon was startled as he was quite engrossed with what he was doing.
“what’s what?” he cleared his throat and composed himself.
“oh don’t play dumb with me, fuegoleon.”
fuegoleon scratched his head. he was about to explode from embarrassment and wished mereoleona would just let it go. much to his dismay, she kept going.
“what’s with the hesitation? you’ve never had problems with romantic interests before,”
“i’m not hesitating,” (lie) “i find them charming but i do not wish to pursue them,” (also a lie)
mereoleona quirked an eyebrow. of course she can see right through his brother
“no romance has ever blossomed with just admiration from afar. you-” mereoleona forcefully poked his brother in the chest. “-need to get your ass over there and start getting to know them like any normal person would! you aren’t a coward, are you now?”
“r-right. i should do that,”
but fuegoleon could not move. his palms were starting to sweat and he could feel every beat of his heart. he felt as if he was going to pass out any moment.
mereoleona groaned. his brother was having a textbook petty school crush and she’s obliged to deal with it.
“for fucks sake, you’re a grown man! a little embarrassment will not kill you. now, go!”
mereoleona pushed his brother forward. fuegoleon relented and started to waddle towards you. at the last minute he wanted to take a detour maybe go to the loo to give himself a pep talk or jump from the balcony and cower amongst the bushes beneath.
as he got closer to where you stood, your gaze shifted from the person you were happily chatting with to him. when you and him made eye contact, your features visibly brightened.
this is the point where fuegoleon started to panic.
you were just about to open your mouth to greet him but he took a sharp turn and headed towards the balcony. what was that all about?
“oh…” you mumbled, partly confused, partly disappointed.
“what’s wrong?” your friend had said.
“captain fuegoleon avoiding me again for whatever reason.” you sighed. “i’ve done nothing to him as far as i could recall,”
“that’s strange,”
you nodded. “indeed.”
“maybe he likes you!”
you scoffed. “yeah right,”
outside stood fuegoleon, his hands gripping the railing so tight his knuckles turned white. he took deep breaths to ground himself but it was no use. even after a few internal monologues, he still felt unsure.
he craned his neck to take a look at you only to find you exiting the room from the other end, saying your goodbyes to the people around you.
it was too late.
perhaps he was a coward after all.
“captain william? are you listening?”
william snapped out of his thoughts and zoned back into what was an important squad meeting. langris had been reporting for the last 15 minutes but due to a lack of response from the captain he decided to call his attention. now all eyes are on him.
“5th of the month,” david whispered. “he has spaced out in every meeting since the start of the month which is so unlike him. i wonder why.”
“shush!” letoile whispered back and flicked him in the forehead.
david was right: william was not himself. it was quite unusual for him to lose focus during important squad meetings. he tried to ground himself, staring at langis as he spoke, mincing his words so he could digest them better. but he couldn’t bring himself to be present at the moment, no. his thoughts, his damned thoughts, would only circle back to you.
“apologies, langris. i’ve been preoccupied by personal matters. go on, you have my undivided attention now.”
while he did survive that meeting, most of the golden dawn members noticed a big shift in him. it didn’t take long for people to start talking though william didn’t pay them any mind.
“everyone’s saying that you’re in love,” the wizard king said. william knew better than to lie. julius, who spent his free time wandering about, knew everything.
william chuckled. “so i’ve heard,”
julius pouted. he was not getting the reaction he intended to get.
“y/n.” julius whispered.
“huh?”
julius caught a glint of recognition in william’s eyes and smirked. he was caught off guard for sure.
“that’s their name, right? y/n?”
beads of sweat had formed on his forehead. his ears turned red at the mention of your name. he quickly averted his gaze and steadied himself.
julius laughed heartily and patted william on the back. “you my friend are definitely in love.”
“give them flowers. i heard sunflowers are their favorite.” julius said as he bid william farewell.
so he gave you sunflowers.
every week sunflowers would appear at your doorstep — bright yellow flowers humbly wrapped in sheets of kraft paper that sometimes came with a note.
“a secret admirer. how romantic!” your friend had teased. “who do you think they’re from?”
you shook your head. “no idea. i couldn’t recognize the handwriting either.”
then you smiled softly. “but the gesture was nice and they made me happy so it doesn’t really matter.”
unbeknownst to you, this admirer of yours had been watching you from a safe distance, his heart thumping as you carefully picked up his little gift and cradled it in your arms. he saw that you were happy, and that was enough for him.
“don’t you feel a little weirded out with yourself? you almost seem like a stalker to me,” julius once said as he sat beside william.
he chuckled. “i could say the same to you, lurking around disguising yourself while being up on other people’s business.”
“hey! thats not—” julius groaned. “what i meant to say was why don’t you go over there and say hi? what could possibly go wrong?”
a lot of things, william thought.
he dreamt of you day and night; he dreamt of touching you, holding you, being with you. but he couldn’t make this a reality for himself. the fear of rejection ran deep in his veins.
“perhaps some other time,” william pursed his lips and stood, no longer wanting to be part of this conversation.
“eh? you’re captain of THE golden dawn, what’s stopping you?” the wizard king was genuinely confused
william sighed and pointed at his mask. julius’s features softened; he finally understood.
“i have places to be, i’m sure you do too. i’ll see you around, julius.”
he bid the wizard farewell and walked away, feeling his heart shattering into tiny pieces.
