Lost Pause
“Sometimes, simply by sitting, the soul collects wisdom.” -Zen Proverb
I don’t know about you, but there are a number of provocations that pop up daily in my little corner of the world. Little things that require me to problem-solve. Bigger things that ruffle my feathers. Even bigger things, throughout the country and around the world, that strike a chord, reverberating through me.
Frequently, I feel myself rush to respond. In anger. In frustration. Because I think I have the answer. And maybe, instead, I need to pause. Pause before responding. Pause before making a decision.
Even as I type this, my own reaction is one of protest - but we need decisive action quickly. We need to formulate a response now. (#iMPULSE) There’s a real fear of appearing like we don’t know the answers (and being expendable) or of missing an opportunity, of losing (our hard-earned) ground.
Expediency is necessary sometimes, but there’s something to be said for giving pause to prevent reacting. Because the greater, graver risk is, I think, creating a slew of unintended consequences in our wake.
A lot of these provocations are single trees, and perhaps we need to pause for a beat and see, really see, the forest. We need to diagnose the problem and its parts correctly if we want to correct them.
It is easy to get caught up spinning our wheels in outrage. (#guilty) We don’t get anywhere, though, we just become more entrenched in our viewpoint. And we might come off as an unregulated hothead. (#alsoguilty) Sometimes this is cathartic, but outside of a few moments of catharsis, it’s not productive or effective in the long-term.
From what I have seen, this serves to garner more hopelessness and cynicism over time. (#UsvsThem) And when we’re in this mode collectively, and I think we are, it weakens us, weakens our democracy. #dividedwefall
That being said, it’s as important as it ever has been for us to consider what is and isn’t acceptable. What will and will not sustain us. We must ask ourselves what conduct is and is not okay. Then draw that line in the sand – and own it, without apology. We don’t need permission draw a line.
And if we are frustrated or shocked and outraged by events, it’s okay, those feelings remind us where our lines are.
But let’s not let those feelings be the end of the line.
There are tough conversations to have; there are difficult choices to make. Conversations and choices of consequence. As I continue living in the verb, I want to focus on the act of pausing. Take a beat to reflect on my lines, see the forest for the trees – and then respond, not react.