#gl anon!

[whereispearlescentmoon]

Can pearl be getting a spinal tap so I'm not alone

Pearlescentmoon is getting a spinal tap!

[soft-butch-cassidy]

As someone who hasn’t really had any crushes on anyone and is really confused about their sexuality I wanna know when did you figure out you liked women?

it was a whole lot of unlearning the homophobia i was raised to internalize. i figured out i liked women a few years ago, in about eleventh grade. i’d gotten out of a very unhealthy relationship with a guy nearly 3 years older than me (i think it was like 2 years and a couple months difference?) and i just could not figure out why i wasnt attracted to him at all in the way that he was to me. i found the term asexual and thought, well, im not attracted to my boyfriend, so i must be asexual! 

spoiler: im not

i stuck with that label for a while before realizing i still felt attraction, though bc of internalized homophobia i didnt realize it was sexual attraction to women. i thought it was just general romantic attraction to people, so i took on panromantic as a label.

and then i was really questioning a lot of that label as i saw a lot of other lgbt issues, and relating a lot to posts about compulsory heterosexuality. i got in a new relationship (two years ago in two days!!!) with a v lovely girl who is v smart and creative and fun. and i realized this was what a relationship should feel like. even if it’s long distance, its so much more real than any feelings ive ever thought ive had for a man. so i realized, oh, im not asexual, im not panromantic, or anything like that. im just gay. and im so happy i know that now.

figuring out your sexuality is a process. really look carefully at how you feel about people, and learn to recognize internalized homophobia. if you’re questioning being wlw, look into comp het. i dont really have advice for mlm. maybe you dont have attraction at all! and that’s fine, too. and maybe you don’t want a label. that’s also fine. maybe you’ll change your labels as you figure out new feelings and unlearn the garbage society feeds us. don’t force it!

[bsdmotivation]

oh man i am hot mess... any advice on how to stay busy this summer (bc i feel like i'm wasting away and my dad is nagging me to focus on something math and science related)? also, how are strategies for keeping in touch with friends over the long break bc i have this bad habit of disappearing over the summer and falling out of touch with friends? how do i buy makeup and apply it? where can i find inspiration for artistic ventures?

Hey dear, looks like you have quite a bit to do! It’s usually hard if you don’t know what to do with your time.

I think the first thing you have to do is make sure you’re taking care of yourself. No staying up late and burning the candle at both ends, you hear? Make sure you eat regularly, and drink water. Flowers of darkness still need to get some amount of sun, but don’t burn yourself.

As for friends, the best thing to do is to talk to them, be it through carrier pigeon or through the phones like you all do now, huhu~ whether it’s to just drink win- I mean, enjoy life or go out to the beach. Even just taking a long train trip or spending time with nature gets the creative juices flowing…

As for makeup, you could ask them to help you out and go shopping together! If you’re nervous and want to try yourself, I recommend starting off simple. Get some foundations and lipstick, and slowly work your way up. I tend to find that colour schemes and colour theory help a ton, as you can see by my own affinity for reds~ there’s tons of tutorials and even employees at stores that could try to help you out, so experiment and have fun! One day my dear, you will fly with those eyeliner wings~

I think you should try to divide your time. Have an idea of what you want to do, whether it’s a tight schedule or just writing a list of what you want to do, then take each day as a new day to complete one of those tasks! Brush up on some work, brush up on some blush, and have fun with yourself and friends! Have a beautiful holiday, and make sure that you stay hydrated!

[aussie-bookworm]

do you need to get *in the zone* to write? if so, how dya do it? any tips on just getting up off your ass and writing?

Oh yeah I definitely need to get in the zone to write. Some days are easier than others lol

As for tips… keep in mind these are my personal tips and it’s not one size fits all – you gotta figure out what works out for you personally

1. Have a good idea about what you’re writing

It might seem a bit obvious but having a good idea of what you want to write does help a bunch. I’m more excited to write if I know what scenes I’m working on and how they relate to the story.

Think about what scenes you want to include while you’re not writing, that way you have something to look forward to when you’re actually sitting in front of your word doc.

Scenes that I’ve been thinking about a lot just fly by because I’m excited to finally get the words out onto the page and I have a good understanding of how things might play out.

2. Set the vibe

Exactly what it says on the tin. Identify what helps you stay in the zone and ready to write and use it to your advantage.

Does listening to music help? Turn it up. Does a specific environment help you pay attention? Go there and if you can’t, try to replicate it. Is your font difficult to read or just plain boring? Change it Comic Sans!

(That last one is a joke but I’m not gonna stop you if you wanna change your default typeface to Comic Sans lmao)

Work on your own environment and make it as writer friendly as possible. But also never underestimate the power of changing things up once in a while.

For example: I typically write in my room where I know no one will distract me. I do short spurts of writing when I get home from work and do longer sessions on weekends. I put on a random playlist and shuffle it, but occasionally I change it up and play video game OSTs.

I tend to change the colour of my pages in Google Docs to be pastel colours so I can still see my words but feel less intimidated by the white of an empty page. I avoid snacking on chips while I write because I dislike grease and flavouring getting on my keyboard.

On the rare occasion when I’m on a weekend trip, I bring my laptop along so I can still do some writing during quiet moments before bed.

This is just what works for me. I’m well aware some of these environmental factors are very niche but you gotta experiment to see what works for you!

Speaking of your environment…

3. Minimise distractions but know when you need to take a break

As much as I would love to, you can’t write while scrolling through Tumblr lol. It’s a classic piece of advice but for a good reason. Focus on the page in front of you and put your phone far away from you if you have to.

But also recognise when you’ve had enough of writing. I’ve found that sometimes during a long writing session, I start to skip words or my descriptions start to not make any sense or something else. It’s a pretty good sign that you need to take a quick break and give your brain a refresh.

Go outside, put on a short YouTube video, do some chores, scroll tumblr, just do something short and sweet that will allow your brain a little break so you can get back to writing once you’re done.

If you are really struggling with staying focused and in the zone, I would recommend trying a writing sprint.

I only found out about these this year but they have been massively helpful in getting me to stay focused.

Set a timer for however long you want (I usually go for 10 minutes) and write non-stop until that timer goes off. You don’t even need to worry about grammar and spelling. Just get the words out and you can edit them later.

It helps identify when it’s break time and sometimes you’ll find that you’ll want to keep on writing after the timer has gone off.

Sprints also help out with the next tip…

4. Just get the dang words out on the page

I will be completely honest, it took me a really long time to understand this piece of advice because it felt obvious. Turns out I was wrong! So let me explain!

Your first draft is your worst version of your writing. No one else will see it so give yourself full permission to fuck up.

Write as many ‘he said, she sighed, they did x’ as you want! Write meta jokes for yourself when you can’t remember how much has passed in-universe! Write parts that you’re still on the fence about including! Write bad jokes you’re not sure will land! Write whatever you want!

Then, once you’ve finished writing and you’re onto proofreading, go through your work multiple times and note what you need to change.

Have you used the same word multiple times in this one sentence? Use another one. Do you like this theme that seems to have developed during the writing phase? Go back and include it more. Is this character repeating an action too many times? Find something else they can do that matches the mood.

Your first draft is supposed to be messy and incomplete. The proofreading stage is where you act as your own worse critic and fix any issues you see.

And if there’s still an issue you’re having trouble with while you proofread? Highlight it and come back later. It’s not going anywhere.

By actually focusing on your writing and getting words on the page, you are more likely to stay in the zone and keep writing! You just need to take that first step and start writing.

Hope that helps anon! At the end of the day, writing should be fun, so try to enjoy every step of the writing process, however you can ❤️

[stunningmlm]

im really sorry to put this on you and im sorry if you dont think youre able to give me an answer, but i just wanted to see if you could? i found out that im arospec a couple months ago, but i still identify as gay. is it still valid of me to call myself mlm even though im arospec? is that considered lying? am i just completely overthinking this whole thing?

well, i'm going to start off my reply saying that, yeah, i don't know much about this topic, so probably talking to someone who knows more about being arospec can probably help you too!

but! being arospec still can mean that you're gay, yes? my partner is aroflux and aceflux and also happens to identify as bi as well. so i mean, if you're like that, and you're aro but also am still attracted to men, then yeah! you can still be mlm!

i certainly feel that you have overthought this a bit. i myself have not identified myself as ace, but i certainly feel like i could probably id as somewhere on the ace spectrum. sexuality and attraction are really complicated, and you certainly don't need to tie yourself to only one label. your identity is complex, certainly not able to be covered by one encompassing label.

so yeah, i definitely think you can still identify as mlm. go for it! :)

[velveteas]

Do you even get a feeling,when you draw, that head is too big? Because I gets this feeling. Please help me .T,T

oh god, believe me! i do it literally all the time. in fact i’ve done it so much my friends refer to it as “pulling a jo/vel” when they do it lmAO

that aside though! i’m not sure if you’re drawing digital or traditional, but ofc with digital an oversized head is nothing the transform option can’t fix :,D either way, however, use guidelines and references! those are probably your best options to drawing something mostly anatomically correct