“The Day I Decided to Go to War”
There are two things that I have learned in life that will bring someone success or opportunity. They are, be competent and be courteous. In fact, if you do only one of those things really well, you could still become successful or have opportunities thrown at you. We all know people who are incompetent but well liked and so they are still given opportunities because well, “They are such a nice guy/gal,” as well as the person that has no people skills, but they are so competent that it would be stupid not to give that person the job, or opportunity.
Anyway, for me, I am not sure which one won out or the combination of the two, but on a day in the Spring of 2004, those two things came through for me. I think all of my opportunities have come by word of mouth because someone, somewhere thought well enough of me to include me or to share the information with me to utilize. But going back to this particular event, it was 2004. I had been out of the Marine Corps for almost two years, which was a tough transition. When I had gotten out in the summer of 2002, I moved to Tallahassee to live with a good friend of mine from high school to start school in the fall. I had a few classes to make up because I was never strong at math and my writing wasn’t too great either at the time, so I spent one semester taking prep classes just to get me up to speed to start college classes.
Imagine living a life that is highly regimented for a length of time, almost five years’ worth and imagine that during this time, you also had a strong sense of purpose, that you were surrounded by a group with a common purpose, the bonds were strong, people had your back, etc. Imagine living a life that took you across the world to see and experience new things. Then imagine after experiencing all that, being on a college campus with none of that. Being slightly older than everyone else but having no common ground with those around you. Going from a highly team-oriented situation to being on your own, alone. Everything that you experienced and bled for, doesn’t matter because no one cares… or rather they are too wrapped up in their own lives that they don’t care about what’s going on in yours. That is a tough transition to get through. It’s easy to develop a chip on the shoulder and become rudderless in the sea of life. I have to say, I have done a lot of difficult things in life, but that transition was probably the toughest for me to get through. It took me a while to realize that I had to find my own purpose, my own reasons for getting up and moving forward. To be ok that people are wrapped up in their own lives and to be ok that I lived my experiences and they are living theirs now.
So that first year was challenging but I was surrounded by good friends and teachers that took interest in me and helped me survive. The second year, I moved back home to Pensacola and enrolled in the junior college for the 2003/4 school year. I became heavily involved in the Criminal Justice Program. I even joined and much to the surprise of the other members of a criminal justice association, I became the president of the association for that year. Things were good but, even as good as they were, I was still broke and trying to survive. I lived with my parents which was such a Godsend because I was broke. I never wanted to take out student loans because I just couldn’t stomach the thought of owing someone that much money. At the time, my dating life wasn’t going very well either. Something about living with the parents didn’t give me a whole lot of confidence.
That changed near the end of the school year. I was out with some old high school friends of mine at a local hangout place in Milton, Florida called Ollie’s. My friend from high school, whom I lived with in Tallahassee was there, as well as a couple of others. Midway through the evening, I received a phone call from a buddy of mine that I served with in the Marine Corps. That call changed my life. I remember him saying very distinctly, “Hey man, you want to go to Iraq?” My response was “uh, no?” which was really a half truth and he said something to the effect of “Well, I thought of you and thought you might be interested.” I trained and trained in the Marine Corps, but I was never deployed to a war zone while in the Marines. I had plenty of buddies of mine going over and serving and I felt that I was an unused tool. I didn’t like the fact that others were going, and I wasn’t. I wasn’t a warmonger, but I wanted to do my part. I didn’t want my friends and buddies in the military to go without me.
The conversation played out and he told me more about the opportunity. Someone had called him and there was a company looking for volunteers to go do protection work in high-threat areas around the world. It intrigued me. Then he told me about the pay… WHAT?! I was broke. I was single. This was a life changing kind of compensation. It wasn’t long before I thought, “Yeah, sure. Send me the information to look over.” When my buddy originally called, I stepped outside to take it. After the call, I went back inside and told me friends about what just happened. I received the information and I signed. At that point in my life, in my mind, I had nothing to lose. The process was lightning fast, and I was gone within a month, maybe two. A few weeks later, I had landed in Afghanistan in June of 2004.
I will always remember that night. It was the night that my life changed for better or for worse, it changed when I received that phone call. It was such a surreal moment. Most people would have killed for the opportunity to do what I did, and it was just handed to me… because I was either competent or courteous enough to be remembered when opportunities were being handed out.
