Gabriel, once again, couldn’t sleep, which was why he was keeping watch. Of course, it was not really keeping watch since Hazel was awake, but he still refused to sleep and told himself that’s what it was. Broken dreams kept him restless, and things still felt too hauntingly familiar. Maybe it was being a stow away on a ship, once again, to evade assassins and even the law, on the Western Royal Channel that caused him to be so anxious.
Not that he slept much when this all started.
He stared out at one of the small window of the ship, imagining being able to see Ente Isla in the distance, his place of origin. His home he was forced to leave. Thinking about his time as an Imperial Guard. Talking and laughing with his fellow guards, his friends, his…
Would things have been different if he had stayed? If he had fought?
All the lives that cared for him. His mother. All the friends and he didn’t give enough, did he? He couldn’t even write a letter, but what could he have said? He couldn’t say goodbye to the people that cared for him, assuming any of them did.
His mother cared for him. He should have told her he loved her, like the good son she always thought he was.
“…Are you really sure you want to do this, My Lord?” Was he really serious about trying to take back the crown? Was he…was he really going to be crazy enough to try and overthrow…?
“I ain’t fixin’ to see my crown and my throne stay in the hands of thieves and cowards, Sir Gabriel. I mean to take back what’s mine.”
The response was immediate, with no trace of hesitation. Hazel had made up his mind, the night they fled the capital city--from the first moment he’d turned back over his shoulder and seen the looming shadow of the castle in the distance. He would come back, he’d decided. He would come back, and he would reclaim what had been taken from him.
They stole his crown because they thought they could get away with it. Because they thought he was weak and defenseless, a well-educated but politically worthless nuisance. Too old to manipulate through a regent, and no foreign monarch worth his salt would betroth their daughter to him, given the clear tension within their borders. They’d decided it was just easier, to kill him. Hazel was content to let his usurpers think that, for now.
(And after all--if he didn’t... do this, if he didn’t move forward... what else was he to do? What would his father have said? What would his father have wanted?
... That didn’t matter, Hazel decided. King Filbert was dead. This was Hazel’s matter to sort out.)
He adjusted his bag on the floor--the only pillow he would get here in the cargo hold. Laying down on his back, he folded his arms behind his head, gazing up at the ceiling.
“So, this was your home country? Tell me about it. What’s it like?”