#haesi don't look

[callicocat113]

I have a little secret.

Some nights, if a friend texted me something late at night, I would just… leave it. And that’s fine, it’s late, after all. But the important part is the “something.”

A friend texts you “fuck” at 12 am. A friend texts you “I love you” at 2 am. And you just… can’t bring yourself to text back.

What happened to the girl with a heart made of gold, who knew what it was like to be at the brink in the dead of the night? What happened to the girl who would stay up all night if her friend needed it? What happened to that girl filled with love?

I don’t know where she went. I like to think she’s still inside me, somewhere. But I’m just so… tired.

Is that bad?

[callicocat113]

In another universe, we're closer in age.

In another universe, I'm not anxious or neurodivergent.

In another universe, I'm confident, beautiful, wholly me and comfortable in my own skin.

In another universe, there is no "platonic" or "romantic," only love.

In another universe, I tell you I love you, and you reciprocate as if it were as simple as breathing.

In another universe, we hold hands.

In another universe, you tell me all your thoughts and concerns.

In another universe, you remove your jacket and the silence you wear.

In another universe, we move together, and our colleges are within walking distance.

In another universe, you hug me first.

In another universe, we are content in our love.

In another universe, you love me as much as I love you.